My daughter and her boyfriend have been together since before high school. I have always struggled with a relationship with him and I know that's due to him lacking any real parentlng as a child. Now however he himself is a father and I have seen in the 4 weeks since Harley came home countless times when he has made excuses to not care for the child and support my daughter. My daughter recovered from an eating disorder that was so severe she was told she couldn't have children so little Harley is out miracle baby. I and my two daughters own a successful and busy/stressful online business. I take Harley two night and days each week as well and other times so they can go to the movies and have some time to adjust. I felt this worked well as I can manage the no sleep for that amount of time lol.
The issue is that he doesn't appreciate the effort I make. He is disrespectful, apologizing later once my daughter takes him to task and fails to recognize that I still have other responsibilities such as being at work tomorrow morning a mere 6 hours from now.
My D text (it's after 9 and that the house rule) to tell me that she is getting sick. I let her know that I would talk to her in the morning and that I am sure we can find a way to take care of this but that I hadn't gotten any sleep and that for now I am sure her boyfriend can offer some support till the morning. SO at 11 pm the phone rings (husbands up at 5 so not happy) and he said he will stay home and watch over them tomorrow (he works for our compnay) Okay great! He's going to step up! Nope 11:30 just fell asleep for the second time and he's calling again saying he "thinks" he "might" be getting sick and doesn't know what he can do. I responded that one think he can do is not call and wake everyone up when it's a non-emergency and everyone know I wake up to the sound of my phone alerts. At at that point he hung up on me. I am so done with the constant disrespect of not just me but my husband and all of the extended family. We all tolerate his behavior. I may love him as I have know him since he was a kid but this has to stop. My D agrees and is on board but I don't want to interfear with them building there family I just don't want to be taken advantage of by him. My D truly values what I do and makes every effort to take care of things if she can. He will take care of anything that is easy and requires no inconvieince. What do I do? How can I help her without ensuring that he gets to play dad while still being a rude child?
SO frustrated and I am sure the 2 hours sleep in the last 30 hours isn't helping lol. If i am way of base or you think I am wrong or out of line I need to know. I want to be a valuable support just not used.
Thanks
Harleysnana <3
p.s typos are being blamed on sleep deprivation lol
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