I haven't used dating sites (yet) but I am active on Facebook. Every now and then I get a friend request from a random man. If the profile picture shows a man holding an assault rifle or in front of an oversized American truck I can just delete the request. There was one recently who said he had found me through a Christian group. I chatted for a while but it only took a couple of days before he was suggesting sex.

I met my husband on a dating so there are many nice, genuine men and women looking for love and friendship.

However, just like in the real world, you have to be aware that there are con artists and nutters about. I met/talked to some lovely men but I also had my fair share of nutters.

My first date was with the most boring man in the world. He had absolutely no independent thoughts and ran his life by timetable. He also seemed somewhat obsessed with my bum lol. I sent him a sensitively worded 'Dear John' message saying I didn't think we had enough in common etc. He replied that in his opinion I was frigid......he certainly got that wrong as I was just entering my Jezebel period lol.

There are those who want to show you their bits but you just say no and/or block them.

The same goes for the scammers. Common sense tells you that if someone asks you for money they're up to no good. They're very clever as they get under your skin and use what they know about you to create the scam. In my case he asked for money as he was working in Nigeria and had knocked down a seven year old girl outside her school (he knew I was a primary teacher). She needed emergency surgery or would lose her leg. It was a cracking story but also an obvious scam.

Then there was the Geordie manager wanted me to join his stable of lady wrestlers. I didn't have that sort of wrestling in mind lol.

People let their guard down on the internet far more than in the real world You have to remember that not everyone will be genuine and not allow yourself to get carried away with dreams of romance before you know that your knight's armour is real and not made of cardboard and aluminium foil.

Remember even on Gransnet we get the odd dodgy poster. Think how most school holidays we get asked about acceptable school shoes.

I too wrote to someone
a friend of mine asked if I would write to a soldier her 'boyfriend a Dr in the American army had a few friends who were lonely , so though I was not looking for anyone I did not mind befriending a lonely soldier in Iraq.
As soon as he contacted me something did not seem right his command of the english language and it was as if I was speaking to two people. Then I asked for a photo and what he did he said he was a Dr but the photo he sent was of of Staff officer and the rank was wrong he was talking of being a professional golfer because I played golf and said he wanted to marry me not a cat in you no where's chance when I spoke to my friend she was mystified so was her boyfriend who she met and had been to England several times .you really have to be careful .

I worked with a very quiet man in his late 50's who had never been married. He too got involved with a young lady in Nigeria (where else) and fell for her stories about wanting to come over to the UK to be with him. Over the course of a few months he sent her hundreds of pounds but of course there was always a reason why the air ticket never materialised and she then needed more money. He wouldn't listen to anybody's advice, telling us she was real as she had sent photos to him. I think she/they pretty well cleaned him out and then of course all contact ceased. Very sad and I often wonder if he did eventually meet someone for real.

This story is so familiar. My friend who is over 60 spends a lot of time on these dating sites but finds it all funny. Luckily she doesn't take it seriously. She has had young men asking for money with sob stories, but she hasn't got any, so that doesn't work. SOme ask sexy things like is she sitting there in a see thru negligee, she tells them she is in flannellette and bed socks. One guy reckoned he was in the US army and a sent a photo of the overall supremo of the American forces in Afghanistan claiming to be him. Apparently, there is a website, where when you get contacted you can look up the scammers asthere is a record - people add them on it so you can check their aliases and photos. I told her she should keep a record and we could write a funny book.

Thank you for sharing your story. It may help others. Only this weekend, my daughter found out her 13 year old stepson was on a very dodgy chat site, and thought he had met a girlfriend there. His father spent hours explaining the dangers, and eventually his son began to believe him. Hopefully he has seen sense and won't go back on to this site.

Whoa, Isobel, this is scary indeed. Thank you so much for posting. And well done for listening to your gut feeling that things weren't quite right.