Eddiecat that is very sad indeed.
I do wonder how our daughter will feel when we die but I honestly don't think she will care too much as we have offered so many olive branches,
That so sad at funeral though.
Good Morning Saturday 16th May 2026
Gransnet forums
Relationships
Such a sad story Eddiecat 
for all the grieving mums/nannies on here and everywhere else in the world too.
I know, my ED would only be there for guilt or greed and I don't want her there for either of those.
I'm sorry that I've made people think like this, this thread was supposed to be about moving on.
I am so looking forward to starting my own life in a few weeks when my son leaves for uni. He too, as many of you will know, can be hurtful and has been recently over bits of things, things said. So, I have done my time, been there for them both each and every day and so it is now time for me to reap my own rewards and look after myself and enjoy my own time doing what I want for a change. It may not be much at first, I will probably be too shattered to move for the first couple of weeks but I have bought new bedding and intend making some meals for the freezer to heat up, but wholesome grub to improve my well being, and then, with your help, get stronger by the day, hopefully.
I do think, as parents, and particularly mums, that we do give ourselves a hard time. We don't learn to take. We give and give until all is spent. I feel like a Duracell battery in a pink rabbit that has worn down so much I can hardly hit my drum. (That's not Ann Summers, that's the advert! 
) We need to learn to be selfish once in a while. Take a little. If nothing else, then some time for ourselves. But we should ask a bit of other people instead of doing it all. Or get some help in if no one is willing to help out.
We go over and over things in our minds to think if we have done anything wrong, said anything, could have done things differently. But the truth is that no matter what we have done/said, things still would have been the same. I do think we live in a throwaway society now and maybe the younger generation do think it ok to throw away relationships too. I have heard that if romantic relationships are not going well with younger people, then they just get rid. There's no working things out or tolerance like there used to be. No accepting each other for what they are. It's a case of "you don't agree with my point of view so goodbye". Oh well, good luck to them, that's what I think. They'll not get far with that attitude. I intend looking forward, to the future, my future and whatever that holds. It's exciting for me too, but then I don't have dreams, being only a mum. 
Morning ladies. Don't apologise for asking if we've had any discussions about what we'd want when we die regarding our EC Ruby. We've had talks about inheritance in the past and it's important that we take onto consideration all aspects of estrangement.
Moving on entails looking forward so I think it's good that you raised this topic. When we first talked about it, I told Mr. S. I didn't want our ES at my funeral and he said he would like him to have the opportunity to go to his if he wanted too. A few months ago he told me he'd changed his mind because he'd been thinking about how hard it would be for me and family members, for him to be there if none of us had had any contact with him up to that point.
I wouldn't be surprised if some viewed a decision not to have an EC at their parents funeral as a means to inflict one final punishment on them but estrangement has such an enormous impact on the entire family, everyone has to be considered.
On the regrets about estrangement thread, someone referred to an AS who'd had no contact with his father for many years, attended the funeral and was distraught. Perhaps he'd realised what he'd done too late, the realisation that his father was dead and there was no going back, he would never see him again no matter how much me may wish too.
It's all so very.
You should have dreams Ruby and if you don't have any at the moment, get dreaming. You're not just a mum, you're a wonderful mum. I'm pretty certain I wouldn't have had your level of tolerance if one of my boys had behaved how your son has. You'll have mixed emotions when he goes off to Uni I'm sure. I hope you'll enjoy some peace and that he will begin to appreciate what a fab mum he has, when he's so far away from you.
eddiecat.
Wow Yogagirl what a poignant story, you put on some really lovely posts.
We've thought about leaving something to our GC Celeb but haven't made any firm decisions apart from DS inheriting everything. If we leave it at that, he'll be able to pass something on to them if he wants too. Thanks for the lovely pm, didn't have time to come on line yesterday so I'll replay later.
I feel as you do Mumsy. Saying 'goodbye' to our ES was my final acceptance that he doesn't want me in his life and our relationship is over. I feel so much better about everything now. Thank you all, for your posts of support and encouragement.
We're back at our holiday home, arrived yesterday just 2 days since we'd left. Perhaps we should sell everything, furniture etc., not buy the new house and just live here
.
That sounds like a plan Smileless. I hope you enjoy a lovely weekend and have a well deserved rest.
I plan to maybe get to Dunelm and buy some more things for my kitchen for post Son. Thank you for your comment, it made me well up a bit really. You're right, I am a great mum, lol. X
What are others planning to do with their weekend? to all. X
No such luck Luckylegs and it isn't looking too promising for next week either. Just had an email from our agent and she seems to think it's the solicitor for the people buying our buyers house who are holding things up
so she's going to chase them up on Monday. Sadly patience is not one of my virtues but I do have others I thinkpossibly, maybe. I'll ask Mr. S. when he gets back from work .... perhaps not.
I'm exhausted just reading about your social diary Celeb good for you and your lovely hubby. Hope you get your tooth sorted out soon. I had toothache once and it really, really hurt. Coping well with physical pain is another virtue I don't possess.
That made me*Yogagirl*, thinking of you flying up to God but not for absolutely ages of course.
We're going out for a meal tonight, just the two of usand I'll have a very quiet day as Mr. S. is through to the semi finals of a bowling competition so wont be back until tea time. Hopefully I'll be able to skype DS in Aus. Oooh I do miss him, why is Aus. such a bloody long way away.
Lovely pic Celebgran of you and D & baby.
Smileless always a waiting game with moving, just think about the day that you've moved in and you and Mr.S have a nice celebratory 
and it will all be over and you can begin your new life.
I went to stay with my sister in Whitstable Kent on Friday/Saturday. It's lovely down there, she is one back from the beach, has a little gated walk way through to it, so nice. We went to a lovely Moroccan Restaurant and had a lovely evening. My sister told me about a reunion she had just had with her Playboy bunny friends from London. One she had last seen just after she had a baby boy. Turns out now the baby boy has grown to a man and has his own children, he has cut her out, she has never seen her GC and has no idea why she was cut out, she had done nothing she can think of to warrant it, She thinks her ex, the AC father must have poisoned his mind against her, along with her d.i.l & her mother! Think he's her only child
Morning ladies, hope you all had a good weekend; sounds like you did Yogagirl. How sad about your sister's friend. It really is frightening how many parents are suffering in this way.
Mr. S. was out most of the day so when DS skyped, I had him all to myself for 2 hours. We had a lovely talk. He knew about the recent correspondence between Mr. S. and ES but not that I'd emailed him last Sunday and said goodbye.
He was clearly upset by it. Like all of us, he never expected it to go as far and for long as it has. I know he's upset that we're moving because he feels that as long as we lived so close to them there was more of a chance for a resolution; even though nothing's changed in 4 years.
He was saddened that I'd said goodbye but supportive, understanding the need to try to find closure. It was a lovely 2 hours, I miss him so much and it's still 5.5 months before we go to Aus. and will see him again.
Feeling a littletoday. Mr. S. lookedbefore he went off to work. He said he's OK, just feels that everything is building up at the moment. I think we did, and are still underestimating how stressful buying and selling houses can be. As you say Yogagirl it's a waiting game. I'm hoping we'll get some encouraging news from our agent today.
It's lovely and
here this morning but still feeling rather chilly. I noticed last night, that the nights are drawing in already. I wish our summers were longer and warmer.
Have a good day everyone.
Smileless selling up and moving house, with all of the uncertainty, waiting, tension and sheer hard work it involves is one of the most stressful things in life. That's without all of the heartache and grief associated with the loss of your relationship with your son. No wonder you are both feeling
I hope it all goes through quickly for you.
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