splitting up at 72?

Umm. I read it too. [confusd]

Thanks so much to both silverlining and teetime for bothering to read and reply to my post. I am sorry to hear about your mum silverlining, that must have been awful for you to have to see. I feel sure though that you supported her and helped her and that would have meant the world to her. I went to the GP years ago to appeal for help and she said yes, he could go on for years. She sent me for counselling and gave me antidepressants but the problem-him- remained - I even tried al anon which was no use at all.
After the last incident of physical abuse which was in March, the police put me on high risk for 3 months. I told him the next time I would bring charges and since then he calls me names and slams around but does not seem to realise that this is still abuse. I am on tablets for high blood pressure and feel very tired and depressed and wonder if I could cope with selling up and moving.Quite honestly I feel I don't care what he does to me as I have no kind of life anyway. My daughters have their own families and busy lives and even my grandaughters are young women now.
I never imagined my life would end up like this it's so sad.

How is he abusive? You say he has nothing to do with you.

Why don't you just ignore him? Shouldn't be difficult if he stays in his own little room.Not ideal obviously, but if there's no other realistic way out, you will need to make the best of it. Cook nice things for yourself. Keep your bit of the flat looking nice. Look after yourself generally.

How has he spoilt your family life? Why can't you visit your children and grandchildren on your own? And invite them to yours? Give the grandkids strict instructions to keep away from his room.

Oh good heavens loobyloo I think you need help with this terrible problem. Is there some agency or organisation that could offer you the type of counselling that will support you in coming to your decision. You could start with your GP. I'm hoping some of the Gransnetters will know of just such a body you could consult. My very best wishes and I am so sorry you are having such a miserable time.

Oh dear looby I am sorry you have been living such an unhappy life for so many yeArs. it is very hard to make a move after so many years of marriage. Property prices are high in the south east but this misery could continue for another 20 odd years. It depends on how much you can put up with. My mum was in the same position and my father lived until he was over 90 and She developed dementia shortly afterwards, so never got any peace or happiness which makes me very sad. If you can be brave enough to make the move try to do this. You could have many years ahead of you, either of happiness or misery.
We offered mum to live with us , but if you can find a small place close to your daughter it would surely be better than waiting to become a Merry Widow, it could be years. Easy to say but not easy to do I know. Talk to your daughter again,