Gift Receiving Etiquette

If I wanted to gift someone X amount of money but forgot to sign the check, I would want them to let me know. Sure, I would be embarrassed but I would be glad I could fix my mistake.

The etiquette is to shred the cheque after posting a note of thanks.

Some interesting stories and solutions posted here, thank you everyone who participated XX

Oh yes I have always thanked the sender of my annual cheques for their generosity. I make a point of writing a thank you letter every year, sometimes with photographs of what I bought for myself with their gift or if I can't print off a photograph, a detailed description

Welli think he wa quite right to mention it. Many people check up (excuse the pun) and would notice it hadnt been cashed. This happened to me once and the sender phoned me to ask if Id received it (also i hadnt thanked her of course!). She immediately wrote another saying 'I wish youd told me sooner'!

When we were furnishing our second home we asked a carpet company to lay the carpets throughout. They did a good job and it was a three hundred mile round trip, DH gave them the cheque for several thousand pounds but I got a phone call the next day to say that DH hadn't signed it. I was mortified as they had really gone the extra mile for us

While in no way would I ever urge anyone to commit a crime I recall that after a year at her new secondary school my daughter showed me her homework diary which had been signed with my signature - but not by me.

The joke is that she did every piece of homework conscientiously often going the extra mile but she had not wanted to bother me as I worked so hard - as a TEACHER.

I can remember a thread on here about people not saying thankyou for chequers sent to grandkids.someone suggested sending an unsigned cheque,and they would get in touch to get it signed.no one guilty of not saying thankyou I hope?

Thats terrible Gillybob - but Barclays always did have an awful reputation amongst the other banks. I worked for Lloyds, and can confirm that they should have never accepted the cheque and once they had they should have been liable. You were not to blame. Of course, back in the day banks and their employees were respected and not challenged, which is what they relied on to wheedle out of their responsibility. - then they started with the selling insurance etc and forgot they were a service industry - at which point I made a swift exit.

I sent an unsigned cheque to my DSiL for my niece and nephew. She rang to thank me for it and mentioned I hadn't signed it I apologised and asked her to destroy it and I would send another, signed one. Of course I would expect to be told if I had sent an unsigned cheque.

That's what you would think caoco but Barclays insisted that it was my fault that I had signed the paying in slip therefore I was liable. I wanted to deduct the pay from the employee who received the money even though he knew it was not his. He must've sought advice and presented me with am letter forbidding me from doing so. i did get it all back but it took years!

Gillybob - If the bank accepted a cheque made payable to XX Ltd and deposited it to Mr YY's account then the receiving bank i.e. the one that accepted the deposit would have been liable and should have refunded the full amount iimmediately.

The banks must never check 8mumofmadboys*

Many years ago paid 2 cheques into the entirely wrong accounts. One was for someone at works wages (£300 ish) and the other was for several thousand pounds made payable to a company. I handed each over with the payment slip but got the 2 mixed up. The result was that the worker ended up with several thousands of pounds he knew were not his but refused to hand back (we got it back in small amounts over 5 years) and the company I was supposed to pay received the smaller amount. I had to sent them the full amount the following week.

Ah, money is a cause of such consternation. My elderly friend recently asked if she could leave me £100.000 in her will. I said 'you can leave what you like to people but I am not family' and she replied 'do I have to have the £100.000'

So I think that one was resolved quite quickly.

I thought bankers cheques were the same as cash and not like an ordinary one, they cost £25 now so they musy be rather special.

My mum used to send cheques for birthdays and Christmas, but one year when she was starting to suffer from dementia, she wrote my DS's address instead of the amount. We gently told her and she changed it correctly.

I had a problem some years ago as I always received a check from abroad (first from Kenya then from the USA when my friends moved there). The bank had always cashed these, though their cut took a large proportion. For the past few years the banks have refused to cash cheques under a certain amount so I thanked the sender for their kindness over the years but told them that I could no longer cash the cheques, as I realised they would probably notice if they weren't cashed. I had thought, and indeed hoped, that this would be the end of it, but now they send sterling.

Mumofmadboys - that brings back memories of working in a high street bank in the eighties. All the cheques drawn on the branch that came through the clearing system were sorted alphabetically each morning and divided into bundles. Each bundle was allocated to a member of staff - usually cashiers - who would then have to check every one for technicalities - date, not out of date or post dated, contain a payees name, words and figures matched and that they were signed in accordance with the mandate for the account. You were supposed to be familiar with all the signatures for your clearing bundle! Any problems meant the cheque was returned unpaid.
Eventually the system was altered and only cheques over £100 were checked and then later only over £500 - goodness knows what they do nowadays.

I read about someone who was so cross that when she sent cheques to her relatives as presents she never got a thank you. She deliberately didn't sign them one year so they had to make contact then. Seriously been tempted to do it a few times myself!

For a while I used to write cheques at work which someone else signed and I found myself doing it with my own cheques out of habit. People never believe that it is an accident but it was just absent mindedness.
It's always worth giving people the benefit of the doubt.

If I sent someone a cheque but forgot to sign it I'd be very apologetic if they mentioned it to me, as it would clearly be my fault.
If I found out later that they said nothing, in case I'd done it on purpose, I'd be offended that they had thought that about me.

If someone did leave the cheque unsigned on purpose, they are the one who is ill-mannered and who has lowered themself.

That's what I would have said, Luckylegs. Phone first and the embarrassment is out of the way before you ring the doorbell.
I haven't seen a cheque for decades - they are no longer in use in Germany.

I think I woukd have rung up and said many thanks for the cheque, but unfortunately it wasn't signed.

I don't understand how it is scrounging, the giver has intended for it to be cashed, and is probably taking it into account when checking balances etc hoping it'll be cashed soon (because people who take ages to cash cheques are annoying) so I think it actually messes the giver about to NOT get it signed and cashed, when they're budgeting for it to come out any day now.

We once received an unsigned cheque for goods that we had sold. When I asked for a signature, from a valued and repeat customer, the person signed it but with bad grace and never bought from us again. He was obviously affronted that I had pointed it out.

My parents once very kindly sent me a cheque as a present but made it out in my maiden name (I had been married for at least 30 years at the time). It was a bit of a problem to know what to do, but in the end I did tell them about it and they were mortified! They sent a new cheque forthwith and were very grateful that I hadn't just kept quiet about it. My father would soon have noticed if it hadn't been cashed, as he was always aware of what was going on in his account and had just had a senior moment.

An elderly family friend always used to send a cheque at Christmas for me to buy a present for the children when they were young. One year the usual Christmas card arrived with the usual note saying 'please give the children £10 each'. Unfortunately no cheque was enclosed! She was such a nice kind old lady that I couldn't possibly mention her lapse to her.