Now retired, my husband wants us to travel - I will miss Grandchildren!

Are there grandparents on the other side? Perhaps they could give extra help while you are away.

I think that as Araabra says 'your husband, partner, lover and best friend' does matter and going on holiday with him, following your joint dream, is not 'giving in' , 'sacrificing' or 'being a Stepford wife'.
They must have waited at least about 30 yrs for this- they haven't gone off and left their child at home. She is fully capable to manage now, and has said so. You need to be fit for a trip like that - not a good idea to put it off indefinitely. The baby won't know they have been and they can Skype the 3 yr old regularly. Many grandparents have grandchildren in different countries and have to rely on this for far more than 12 week stretches.
The best thing that we can do for our children is have parents who still love each other and have fulfilled lives of our own. OP seems keen to give her DD date nights- now is the time to have her own!
3 months is no time at all - we have just booked something for 3 months time and I know that we will be there before we know it! It isn't as if they are going off on a gap year!

Willsmadnan, what a lovely list, bet your grandchildren love the time they get to do spend with you. Your Breaking News was spot on.

JaneA
It was Willsmadam who made, as I just put it, a 'virtue of wifely loyalty'. Apologies for attributing that to you.

JaneA said:

Would you like it if I called you an earth mother, conjuring up a picture of a drab, saggy- boobed woman with a baby sling and sandals?

Firstly I did not 'call you' a Stepford Wife, although in making such a virtue of 'wifely loyalty' your post does echo the sentiments of one.

It wouldnt worry me if you think I and the other posters who dont have any great desire to engage in long holiday trips with husbands/partners but prefer to maximise time with our GCs, sound like Earth Mothers, since I dont share your negative stereotyping of such women.

"a number of posts attacking the OP for not going along with her husbands wishes."

Nobody attacked. OP said they planned on travel, I think posters are saying what about your husband, your partner, your lover, your best friend? Doesn't he matter?

or to give them a date-night

I am so jealous of these 'date-nights' that so many young couples seem to want these days.
A date night for us was me choosing a different recipe on a Saturday night and cooking it, with a bottle of home-made wine.

I am sure they can manage without one for a few weeks.

I think the Stepford Wives were robots
Did the men kill their wives or microchip them? Can't remember

I think they removed their brains and replaced them with a programmed computer.

Mair I too find your posts insulting. I am not 'a dutiful little wifey', for your information.

I was jesting, and it wasnt directed at you JaneA, but at the tone of a number of posts attacking the OP for not going along with her husbands wishes.

Sorry 'indispensable'

I don't think that it is anything like Stepford Wives!
OP had wanted to go- she says it had been their dream. (Not just her husband's dream).
I think it is a shame that having had years of putting her DD first they are now free and yet she still can't put her DH first - just for one small time. Her DD is quite happy for her to go and will manage. Most people don't live so close anyway- I am nearly 200 miles from my mother and so only see her about every 3 months anyway.
They haven't got years and years ahead of them to do a long trip - who knows how long they will both have their health to do it? When will be a good time?
If she feels guilty about not doing the childcare and letting them have a date night she could leave some money for babysitters.
I would be highly annoyed if my parents had put off a wonderful opportunity when I had 3 young children because they felt indespensible - I was an adult- quite capable of coping!
I agree with willsmadnan and JaneAinsworth

Blackpool even ( or maybe Morecambe, my late Mother always thought it was more upmarket.)

Settled for a long weekend in Blackppol?

Bet they haven't!

perhaps they've gone to Mexico!

We need the OP to come back and say what she thinks now about it all.

Mair I too find your posts insulting. I am not 'a dutiful little wifey', for your information.

Being married to someone is not about getting your own way all the time, nor is it about sacrificing your own wishes to those of your partner. It's about respecting your partner's point of view, while still maintaining your own self-respect, and coming to amicable compromise.

I'm glad that my two DCs who have children of their own, while glad to see us and grateful for any help we can give them from time to time, are capable of managing their own lives without our constant input.

I think the Stepford Wives were robots

Did the men kill their wives or microchip them? Can't remember.

Perhaps he'll go on his own then, rather than face a retirement of never going anywhere because of the DGC and never fulfilling any of the dreams he has had for years.

I really take offence at Mair's Stepford Wives' jibe. Maybe you should actually watch the film, Mair rather than firing from the hip without substance. As I recall the SWs were tranquilised from the start and totally subservient from the first night they joined the Stepford community. Now, as its a really long time since I decided to live with my partner (53 years to be precise) my recall maybe a bit dodgy, but I'm pretty certain we fell in lust. And children were the last thing on my mind back then in the 'Swinging Sixties. It lasted until last year when he passed away.
I was his partner, in bed , home and business and I never thought twice about leaving our children (3 at the last count)with suitable carers, to accompany him where ever we wanted/ needed to go.And no, I never wore a pinny, stilletos, or a basque! But , we took our children on holidays, enjoyed family events, whilst I was essentially a partner before I was a Mum. So because of that, how dare you label those of us who have had fulfilling lives with our partners, rather than side-lining them for a nest full of children.
Would you like it if I called you an earth mother, conjuring up a picture of a drab, saggy- boobed woman with a baby sling and sandals?
I stand by what I said in an earlier posting ....when some posters have said they couldn't bear to be away from their GCs for more than a day or two, to me it shows the driving reason for marrying was to have children, and ultimately grandchildren. They obviously prefer to be the centre of their children's universe, rather than an adult in a grown-up situation sharing the last years of their lives with someone they (probably) fell in love with,however fleetingly. Each to her own, but don' t you pin a label on me FGS.
Breaking news !..... unfortunately we all die. What are those dependant ACs and GCs
going to do when we pop our clogs? Carry on regardless, I guess.

It is difficult to be away from them, I agree, although I have never been for more than 2 months and you will miss them a lot.
But heartbroken? That is quite a strong word to use.

"We are just retired and my husband wants to go away for 3-4 months to Mexico (as we always dreamed of doing when we retired). But now that the time has come I find it difficult to be away from Grand-daughter (will be 3) and Grand-son (will be 7 months). My husband thinks i am being unreasonable, but i am heart broken. I am just wondering if other grandmas feel like I do."

I think other grandmas feel as you do, you can discern that from the replies.

However, as you and your husband planned this together, some thought must be given to his feelings as well as yours. Compromise can be found.

I agree Jalima, she may well, but she's not likely to enjoy a long trip IMO missing her DD and GCs.

she may enjoy it more than she thinks
Especially if they compromise and go for 4-6 weeks

Compromise - that's what it's all about!

Jalima
As Gillybob pointed out 'dreaming' was one thing, the OP hasnt confirmed if she ever really planned this.

I am shocked at the number suggesting she should be a dutiful little wifey and go to keep her husband happy, a compromise, yes, thats good, but not four months!