Estrangement / Cut off Mum

grr. That isnt much clearer either.

I dont need the as well in the last post.

My post about mothers and mils was to Araabra as well. Sorry I didnt make that clear.

Smiles yes, I responded to your questioning, in the post containing your questions.

LOL! I'm not WendySue! Iv seen some of her posts and agree with some of what she says. But she's much gentler than I am.

However, I don't see where Iv said anything harsh here. I think some people are personalizing statements that aren't about them.

I see you did respond, in part Araabra on the thread in AIBU.

I think it's pretty obvious what I meant Ankers has she wrongly cut out her parents or in laws without justification.

I wouldnt have thought there is any mother or mother in law anywhere, who thinks they have never done anything wrong.

Is Araabra a dil who knows she is in the wrong?

mcem.

Araabra, none of my fellow posters are my "cohorts", they are my friends. Some of our friendships are more than 4 years old and began because we all have the same painful and tragic thing in common; we have been cut out of our AC's and GC's lives.

Do you honestly think that your ill informed, cruel and malicious posts are going to hurt us? If you do, you are sadly mistaken. You know almost nothing of my situation and in truth you don't want to know do you. I asked you a question; why can you not see any correlation where a woman, before cutting out her in laws and pressuring her husband to cut out his parents, cut out her own parents, and has done so on more than one occasion.

I asked you what your frame of reference is, again ignored. We are talking of our own personal experiences; I'm wondering what yours is. If you're an AC with absolute justification for ceasing contact with your own parents or your in laws, why don't you say so?

Those that are, and in order to bring a sense of balance to this discussion reiterate their story, are always treated with respect and empathy. Or perhaps you're an AC who without justification has abandoned her parents so you're trying to make all abandoned parents and denied GP's look bad so you can feel better about yourself and what you've done.

You are not bringing anything of worth or value to this discussion, just your insults.

eddiecat's post is certainly worth considering, maybe "the sensible ones among us should abandon this thread", I wasn't going to post again but then I thought 'no'; I'm not leaving the last word to the likes of you and Bibbity.

What did you come on this thread for? A bit of 'granny bashing'? Surely you both didn't come on here to publicly demonstrate your ignorance and cruelty, or maybe you did.

It's lovely reading the mums here need no input on what they may have done wrong, that they are perfect, and everything is faulted to the c i l. Good news, no introspection, selfreflexion, or apologies. Brilliant.

Mcem what lovey post thank you

None of us know what lies ahead do we?

I thank god we have wonderful son and family and good friends also share my twins grandchildren but lots people have been estranged and are left with nothing.
No one is entitled to put the outrageous rude ignorant posts that we have seen on here as luckylegs says it says so much about them.

Shame on them,

As someone who is in no way involved with this thread I'd like to say to those who think they should weigh in and impose their views - please just stop and think. This is primarily a thread for people who clearly need the support of others in the same sad position.
No amount of advice criticism from posters who are not sharing their pain will help in any way so why not just 'walk away'and thank your lucky stars you don't need that support.

A and b take note please.

Yogagirl you don't have to explain yourself to bibbity he or she will only turn it round as a further insult,

Thanks Cari fro pointing out yes these are support threads.

Oh dear Luckylegs I'm so sorry you are feeling down , I feel the same, into the 5th year of estrangement Yes it does help to write it down and get it off your mind, so carry on on here. These young mothers on here A&B will one day be a GM themselves, as will our AC, so I take it they will feel it right and proper when their AC 'cut them off!

Thank you Celebgran

Sparklygran Thank you, I got your name mixed up but not your posts, I remember you have had a hard time and are in the same sad boat as us all on here, I felt soooo bad when it was pointed out I had put the wrong name, so sorry if it upset you, till it was sorted

Thanks for pm Smileless and you are quite right of course.

Bibbity my now estD phoned me each and every morning when she first moved from my house into a bungalow with her now abusive husband, she would phone during the day too and my darling little GD would do the same, from that to totally 'cut out' As someone else said on here, that just doesn't make sense! and sorry, but in my eyes blood comes before stepfamily, when my darling little GD grows up and learns the truth, the enormity of what's been done to her, what's been taken from her, she will feel the same, with no doubt what-so-ever! Her stepdad even took her name away from her

Yogagirl please ignore the ignorance of some of thes posters those that know you realise exactly what happened and that's all that matters.

Seeing the bullying ignorance of the posts on hear makes me realise how vulnerable children at school get driven to suicide it is horrendous. What sort of low life
Gets pleasure from another's heartbreak?

Please just ignore yogagirl they really are t worth getting g upset over.
How bored or empty must their lives. Be? Nooone normal who is enjoying life would make comments like theynhave,

Unlike you who have amazing career, beautiful daughter and Grandchild.

Sadly the threads are never moderated unless complaints made,

A and B posts, best just ignored, they seek to cause distress, which says more about their state of mind than ours. Reading through the last few days posts I was pleased to see the one by Monica, because I have been so very down, depressed and not feeling well and not seeing any point in carrying on, just me to think of, just the phone calls from my son, this feeling has gone on since before Christmas. Whilst many posters on here have adult children manipulated but their partners, which I have witnessed in the past with people I know, in my case that is not the case. My daughter just hasn't wanted me in her life for a long time, she has lots of money and her friends are the same, I was fine when I had a good job and looked glamouress, but those days are gone and I don't fit in, particularly not without my husband, who was a lovely man and everyone liked, she told me that she had no intention of looking after me as I was getting old. I have never needed looking after, I have always been independent. It has been like this for so many years but as I get older I find it harder, this is a permanent state of affairs and I do think somehow it must be my fault, but I can't see how, what matters is that for whatever the reasons it is hard that someone you love so much, can write you out of their life and I can't see for the life of me what I did, it will never alter. Those of you, most of you with these manipulative sil and dil, I feel that in time your estranged children will break away, I can understand how it must feel to be bullied and get so low that it is easier to go the bullies way, but eventually, perhaps as the children get older and they start to question, the circle will break, I do hope so, meanwhile I think what Monica said is the only way really. For whatever reason, no one should have this pain, if there was only an explanation for any of you it would help, but just to be written off without explanation, Is cruel. I had my explanation, but it was so final and there is no solution, it just is. I have to keep going, just for me. Thanks for listening, it helps getting it off my chest.

Ohhhh yes. S i l must have real magic. Drug her away from mama with his magic.

Ahh yes. Label everyone whom challenges you trolls.
The same thinking that blames the magic virgina/penis

Eddiecat leave the trolls to it

Yogagirl no problem, all sorted I thought I had a naughty twin!

Eddie Brilliant. Better that than any insight into your entitled drama.

OK - I think the time has come for the sensible ones amongst us to abandon this thread

Smiles Bippity is spot on. You and your entitled cohorts ask way too much from your AC. That's where the rubbish resides.

I think what ridiculous is the absurd amount of entitlement that bleeds from some of these posts.
Her GC, her namesake, her blood.
The fact yogagirl thought it was appropriate to post pictures of those children without their parents consent to this site again speaks volumes.
The way she repeatedly states that the girls step father is not her blood in such disdain speak volumes. That man married her mother when she was young, has taken her on and clearly must care for her.
The fact he isn't blood means nothing.