Continued support and fun aspects too of rebuilding lives after estrangement can't believe 4 years and we still here to offer help, friendship and support.TWO

Thanks for this,Smileless.

I haven't had time to read all the posts yet so will be back on later. Just wanted to let you all know that Celeb is about to go into surgery and Mr C. will be able to see her again about 3.00 pm.

She sent me a text about 9.30 saying she was nervous, bless her I bet she is. I am just thinking about her

I'll keep you all updated as soon as I hear anything.

Norah,to clarify,I meant privately to yourself meaning you didn't wish your thoughts and feelings to be revealed to neither your daughters or their husbands/partners...we all have to do this sometimes,think it could be called diplomacy in other circumstances.

You are welcome to express them here.
Do understand you may feel differently about exposing yourself on this forum.
Think it would be helpful to us to learn and share in order to help each other.

You are welcome to pm me if you wish.

5 years ago I would have been horrified to think that I was writing on such a forum, but know there are are others silently joining us.

We may not always agree and are open to criticism.
Being judged for the situation we sadly find ourselves in is a constant,as we are the keenest judge of ourselves.
No one beats us up like ourselves.

Enough navel gazing,the sun is out,let's seize the day?

Yoga, NS said "maybe privately" naturally I wondered if she meant a pm?

Norah why do you feel the need to pm Northernsoul?
Is it shame, as your 4D have cut out their husbands parents & your on a thread for those 'cut-out'

Message deleted by Gransnet. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

NorthernSoul, Do you mean answer your questions in a pm? I can do, I have done before when ladies here asked me questions.

Yes, I see this from a different view. One sil married to dd already co and over many years the other 3 sil have co to their parents.

You must be telepathic,Yoga!
Was just musing on what Norah wrote about having a small view on estrangement as her four sons in law have cut their mothers/parents out...you see what we need is the view from the 'other side' and think you could contribute to this,Norah. I am not being sarcastic, but this would put another perspective on the situation.
From what you've written,unless this has changed,you'd rather not upset the situation or status quo.
Not knowing your relationship you have with your family and daughters in particular,it's difficult to form an opinion on what your view is.
Maybe privately you'd like to suggest the pain this is causing.What you have read on here has given you an insight to this.
Are there grandchildren involved too?
This is not an attack on you Norah, think you are in a unique position of having not one but four sil's cut off from there mothers.

Smileless,Perth is a wonderful place.We were lucky to stay there as part of an Australian tour.Cottesloe beach brings back happy memories.Loved being in Australia and found the people very friendly and helpful.

Giving Celeb positive thoughts,really felt for her when she said she was very scared..we would all feel that way too.

Have a good day ?

Celebgran when you read this your op will be all over, in the past, thinking of you right now and wishing you all the best God Bless xxx

Anya - what`s with the comment about "pity party"?

We seem to have had a few days of people being snipey with each other (perhaps it`s the weather) - can`t we aim for a week of being kind?

Celebgran I'm not bitter or angry, I'm grieving, different emotion! And I didn't apologise to GrannyGrace, just saying sorry for her sad situation of not seeing her S as much as she would like, I know that's almost zero, but almost is more than us who are estranged and see nothing of our loved ones.

Nice post Northernsoul

"HAPPY ANIVERSARY" Rhinestone
Wonder if what you say is the reason we mums on here are cut out, as we seem to all be the really caring mums, always there for our C & AC when their grown, yet when you see/hear of some rotten mums that treat their C bad, their C would never cut them out and can't do enough for them So maybe because our love & care is on a plate they feel it can easily be chucked away, and maybe got back later

Norah If I wasn't estranged, my 3 AC would inherit equally, as you are saying for yours, but that's not the case for me, I have only one AC in my life this last near 5yrs, so for you to pipe-up about you are dividing equally, on a page for estrangement, you are on the wrong page, no relevance on this page! Let us know what your 4D's husbands, cut out families are doing, and that would be relevant.

A pity party - that's not an actual party.......is it?

Rhinestone, congratulations on your special day. You say you are having a big party, who are all these people that are coming? They will be people who care about you. I am sorry about your son, but children don't normally bother with wedding anniversaries here unless it's a milestone one. I alway send both my children them, but never had one back. Birthdays are different, more easily remembered. So don't get upset it's just they have busy lives. I am estranged from my daughter, will never get a phone call or a card. I ask myself everyday what was it I did so wrong, I don't get an answer though.

I'm having a pity party today. Yesterday was our anniversary.My DD and her two children called. But no call or card from my son, mother or brother. My stepdaughter texted us. This is the second year my son has forgotten even we give everyone a calendar with our photography on it along with the dates of everyone's birthdays, anniversaries etc. I would excuse my 88 year old mom but she never misses her doctor appointments or dates with friends and she has a bigger social life than we do. I'm feeling like the more I do for everyone the less they care. As long as I can take care of them is all they want.
And yet we rented a house in a beach town to take everyone on a four day get away. What's wrong with me? I have spent my life making sure everyone was happy but me.
We did this with ESS and look where that got us. Sorry but I had to vent as I'm feeling very down today.

Wishing you courage, celeb. Pretty soon, it will all be behind you except for recovery.

What a beautiful thing for ds to do. No wonder you are proud of him!

Grace, it did sound as if you see ds and dil, occasionally. Is that not the case?

Not sure about your comments being bigger person
But you have. MAde effort g grace and I certainly wish you no harm or,nastiness

To be estranged from a child is horrrendous pain I have not had time read all posts today buT gather you do not see your son and am sorry you have that to deal with,
Well done for coping,

I just have to focus on those that do love me this week it will be difficult enough without breaking my heart over a daughter who no longer wants me,

However it's tough.

Thank you g grace I have v good memory

Thanks do much all of you I am v scared
Yes so,proud of my son

Celebgran why such nastiness toward me, I assume yogagirl apologised as she thought I had regular contact with my son. Perhaps my post wasn't clear enough. You do like to rake up history Celeb,I'm not the only one to get posts removed,you yourself have as well. But I like to think I'm the bigger person,so I wish you well for your op.

celebgran What a lovely thing for your son to do, such a tiring drive.

for tomorrow, good luck.

Wondering why your apologising to Grannygrace

She was so rude to me that the thread was deleted.

Have you forgotten smileless and Yogagirl?

However I am not going drag up past nastiness far too stressed panic is setting in,
Yogagirl hope you do go to party

Bright spot is all support you lovely ladies have given me and my dear son is coming 200miles taking days off work to visit?.

Every cloud.

Yogagirl please please try for sake of your health to let that bitterness go, it will eat you up.
I don't blame my s imlaw or my daughter not anymore they don't like or want me in their lives their loss as well as mine, it is what it is,

Yoga, of course I am not estranged, my sils are. I can see a small view.

I hope we would lean to equal inheritance as GrannyGrace. Nobody cares to estate remainders if the estate has been well and happily spent on the way. Most much prefer their benefactors to be alive to a remainder, in my experience.

Thank you Starlady yes always depressed due to this estrangement, but I take my therpy on this thread, with grans that understand, some in the same sad boat and others that just have sympathy & understanding. I have always thought that a professional therapist, unless having the knowledge of estrangement themselves, wouldn't help much.

Can someone push me off the settee so I can go out!

So sorry GrannyGrace