Niece spotted with someone else

Maw Broon It was a long time ago, when I was slim, elegant, no elastic waists trousers and no grey hairs! Oh those were the days!

I like the "glamorous"!!
I trust it wasn't many years ago?

Absolutely stay out of it. Its not your business hun. Also unless you have seen it for yourself you don't rely on gossip as fact. You won't be thanks for sticking your two pennorth in and causing trouble.

Years ago, I met my husband in town and we went for lunch near his office. Someone spotted us together and went back to the office, telling everyone the boss was having an affair with a glamorous redhead.

When I was in my twenties, my dad took me out for lunch near where he worked. Someone he knew 'spotted' us and thought I was his bit on the side! It gave us a good laugh

Question: Does your niece know this 'close family member' well, i.e. would she have recognised her as such when they came face to face? If yes, then she must suspect that this encounter may have been reported back and presumably she is prepared to brazen it out. Even if you did force things to come to a head she could always deny it, causing a great deal of embarrassment to you, not to say resentment within the family. If it had been you who saw her holding hands with the other man then perhaps it would be a different story, but as it is - let well alone.

Many years ago an old school friend said he was coming to this area to do a job, he asked could we meet for lunch, hubby also invited, but as it was a working day he couldn't make it, he said you go, I asked was he sure, he said of course, I went, when I met the friend he gave me a big hug & we sat down to lunch, chatting non-stop quite sitting close to each other as the place was busy & noisy, someone there saw us & reported to my hubby that I was with another man, he laughed at them knowing full well what had gone on, I had even told him what we were talking about, he knew there was nothing in it, BUT if I hadn't said anything, just gone along for the lunch this lady could have caused huge problems for something completely innocent.

Say nothing.....the fallout always rebounds on the one who said something, particularly if you don't know the full story.

I agree that you should say nothing; too easy to make mountains of molehills, could be a mistake, and if she's having second thoughts, better to find out now rather than later.

Please don't say a word to anyone.

Please, please, please, don't get involved, it could be completely innocent, the close family member could be wrong or trying to stir up trouble or it could be completely innocent. Either way, it isn't your place to interfere, unless you see it yourself leave well alone.

I don't see why you can't have a general chat about a wedding with your sister, is your niece excited, making any plans yet etc (weddings are booked long ahead now) and just see if you get any feeling from what is said. It might set your mind at rest. I would agree it could be a work colleague or old friend if they hadn't been holding hands, also if she is engaged then surely she is not free.

The OP said that the other relative came face to face with the niece while she was with the man. Did the niece look guilty? Whether she did or not the niece must have known at that time her secret was out - if there is a secret that is.

I would say nothing, but it can rebound both ways, damned if you do and damned if you dont
I would keep quiet, and if it all comes out in the end, you can truthfully say you were told by someone else but didnt believe it was anything serious, or might have been exaggerated so didnt want to cause trouble

You don't have any explanation for what you saw so you may be completely misreading the situation. Keep quiet. If you MUST say something to anyone, approach your niece.

icanhandthemback - totally agree the woman herself probably needs support as you suggest - but at the same time would not thank you, and if she is innocent it would all rebound on you.

icanhandthemback - totally agree the woman herself probably needs support as you suggest - but at the same time would not thank you, and if she is innocent it would all rebound on you.

icanhandthemback - totally agree the woman herself probably needs support as you suggest - but at the same time would not thank you, and if she is innocent it would all rebound on you.

icanhandthemback - totally agree the woman herself probably needs support as you suggest - but at the same time would not thank you, and if she is innocent it would all rebound on you.

icanhandthemback - totally agree the woman herself probably needs support as you suggest - but at the same time would not thank you, and if she is innocent it would all rebound on you.

icanhandthemback - totally agree the woman herself probably needs support as you suggest - but at the same time would not thank you, and if she is innocent it would all rebound on you.

icanhandthemback - totally agree the woman herself probably needs support as you suggest - but at the same time would not thank you, and if she is innocent it would all rebound on you.

'Last time I looked, having a fiancee means you're still not married!'

Yes Willa45, I agree. But when you have been living with a person for a couple of years, bought a house and spent money on doing it up, looking for wedding venues I see that as a commitment. That's my opinion and may be very different to others'.

While I intend not to say or do anything about it, it's not something I feel at ease with. I just hope that she will make the right decision for herself, or hope that what was seen is a mistake.

As has been pointed out it's none of my business. Thank you all once again.

If you decide to say nothing now be prepared for the possibility of blame/anger coming your way if it proves to be true. I am saying this as in my ex's family one nephews fiancé was playing away, one of the other close family members knew about it (it was with their son whom she later married) but said nothing. When it all became general knowledge someone let slip that family 2 had known all along and family 1 was incensed that they had not spoken up. Very frosty relations ensued with both families barely speaking to each other over it

'seen twice'............doing what? FGS, its not something witnessed by the OP, its heresy by someone else who could have their own agenda. Say absolutely nothing. If there was a problem you would not help....and if there is nothing then you will be seen as a nosey relative who makes snap judgements.
People have friends of both sexes....see my first post......its not the 1930s when girls had to ask permission to 'walk out'. In the words of the song......'Let it go.............'