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Younger friends

(54 Posts)
kittylester Wed 02-May-18 07:41:29

Yesterday, I bumped into the young woman I worked with (I was a volunteer, she was paid) quite closely, for over a year.

As we are friends on fb, I messaged her to say how nice it was to see her, how well she looked and how I missed working with her. We exchanged a few messages and she suggested meeting for a cup of tea during her lunch hour.

Now, I'm having a crisis of confidence and wonder whether she is humouring this 'old dear' or whether she really wants to meet up! Does she think I'm a sad stalker?

She is the same age as my youngest daughter ie 30 to my almost 70.

What do you think?

stevierichards1954 Thu 07-Jun-18 07:03:33

Great kitty. The new friends I made make me stay young at heart. And love to hear my stories of experience lol

kittylester Thu 07-Jun-18 06:55:01

I'd forgotten I'd started this thread so I thought I'd update.

I did meet my friend and we will meet again. In fact we got together with some other (younger) colleagues and had a great catch-up. They paid me the huge compliment of acting amazed at my great age (69)!

stevierichards1954 Thu 07-Jun-18 05:55:16

Last year I got invited to a summer BBQ from my sons friend. I thought would have been a wide age range to my age. Why I don't know. Turned out I was the only one out of 20 odd people that was past 35!!!
I had a blast after I got over my shyness. Even joined in with some of the games. Went to four more. Some of them I see for coffee or they come to mine for a smaller BBQ.

notanan2 Mon 07-May-18 22:45:38

The funny (but nice) thing about "work friends" is they arent necessarily the type if people you usually would gravitate to outside if work.
But with "work friends" you're forced togethet for long enough to over come your first impressions and preconceptions.

So your work friends may be more of an eclectic mix of people than your usual type. But thats what makes them so special.

One of my favorite work friends holds political views that I find distasteful. Had I met her at a party I would probably have wandered away to find someone more "my type" to chat to. But having to work with her 5 days a week meant that I couldnt do that. And I got to find out all the other fantastic things about her!

Age is far less of a chasm than fundamentally opposing politic.

Grandma70s Thu 03-May-18 09:11:09

I only have one real friend younger than I am. She is 18 years younger. We met decades ago when we were singing in the same choir, and happened to be sitting next to each other. She was 23 and I was 40-ish. We clicked straight away, and have been friends ever since. She no longer lives near me, but we keep in touch.

On the whole, I don’t meet younger people.

ginny Thu 03-May-18 07:54:52

Friendship has nothing to do with age. I have friends of all ages. I belong to a craft group and the ages are between early thirties through to nearly 70. We have a weekend away each year and have some great discussions and so much fun. Enjoy your meet up.

Elrel Thu 03-May-18 01:23:43

Kitty: I expect she's looking forward to seeing you again!

Shizam Thu 03-May-18 01:08:43

Have friends from both sides of the age divide. Oldest is in 80s. Youngest in 20s. It’s who you are and what makes you laugh and tick that makes the difference. Go and have a good natter!

poshpaws Wed 02-May-18 19:43:49

I still miss my late friend who was very close, and 40+ years older than I was. Friendship comes in all ages and shapes!

BlueBelle Wed 02-May-18 19:37:07

One of my closest friends who I did lots with (music festivals, cinema, volunteering,family parties, lunches out, camping etc etc) was half my age in fact she was younger than two of my children We hit it off straight away, she came from Bulgaria and knew no one in town I said if ever you want company you know where I am We we’re close friends for about fifteen years then she and her husband moved to NZ now we are just fb friends I never thought of her as younger we had a lot in common and seemed to think with the same mind set we had lots of fun especially camping with a glass of wine under the stars
I miss her

Yellowmellow Wed 02-May-18 19:22:18

Agree with the other Gransnetters. Just go and enjoy yourself. We do different things with different friends. I have friends of all ages, and some are old work colleagues of all different ages. One of my best friends is nearly 80 nearly 16 years older than me. We have had such fun over the years. This lady suggested the meeting, just enjoy catching up with her.

Granash Wed 02-May-18 15:53:59

Most of my close friends are younger than me which I'm hoping (probably foolishly) means that I'll pop my clogs before they do.

annemac101 Wed 02-May-18 15:46:25

I am friends with a girl the same age as my daughter,34. I met her when I volunteered with a charity and was assigned to help her. After I finished volunteering we became firm friends, I don't feel the age difference between us. I am also friends with people 15/20 years older than me and still feel no age difference. She didn't need to ask you out she must have wanted to so just enjoy the friendship for what it is. People are always saying that age difference means nothing when you fall in love with someone so it stands to reason that friendship is the same, some people just click no matter what their age.

Gillcro Wed 02-May-18 15:10:50

Go and meet your friend kittylester, she wouldn't have asked to meet if she didn't want to, age shouldn't matter if 2 people get on and like each other.

winterwhite Wed 02-May-18 15:08:45

Not ‘old dear’ at all! What a thought. You will surely have talked about families, children and so on when you worked together, she prob just wants to catch up a bit. Nice thought.

goldengirl Wed 02-May-18 14:47:49

As someone has already said: Age is just a number. I enjoy friendships with younger people and older ones. Every one has something to offer - and to learn from!

quizqueen Wed 02-May-18 14:43:33

I used to clean for a lady in her nineties. When I started working for her I was late fifties. She was quite a character and we became good friends and I enjoyed her company.

Grannyparkrun Wed 02-May-18 14:01:55

For all you know, your friend may be thinking exactly the same as you, but opposite, ie that you’re just humouring her, that you can’t possibly really want to spend time with a much younger person etc! We all have these crisis of confidence & they can stop us just having a nice time. Enjoy her company?

craftynan Wed 02-May-18 13:43:41

Two of my dearest friends are in their eighties - I’m early 60’s. One I visit as she’s less mobile now, the other I visit but also go out with for a coffee or lunch. Both have children similar in age to me and I have the bonus of being friends with them as well. Enjoy yourself, Kitty, remember she asked you and ignore negative comments on here cafecupcake

Eloethan Wed 02-May-18 13:36:17

kittylester She suggested it so she obviously wants to meet up with you.

I think the criteria for getting on with people and wanting to be friends with them is not how old they are but how well you "click". There are people within my own age group who, even if they have the same views and interests as me, I don't feel that comfortable with. If you really like someone and enjoy their company, chances are they feel the same.

I am nearly 68 and I have a friend who is well into her 80's. She now lives in Canada but since she moved 8 years ago we have written to each other.

Gabriella I think the tone of your post was abrasive and uncalled for.

123kitty Wed 02-May-18 13:34:55

Lose the negative attitude- go and enjoy a catch up

jinnyifer Wed 02-May-18 13:22:46

Hi Kitty, just to reassure you, age makes no difference in a friendship, one of my dearest friends was 40years older than me. We had such fun together, and I learnt so much from her. Originally, she was born in Canada, and lived there until she was 5 when she was adopted and moved to England. I treasure all the stories she told me about her life, the great times we spent together and how she became one of my best friends in the whole wide world.

cornergran Wed 02-May-18 12:53:43

Go and see kitty Nothing to lose. You’ll soon sense if she wants to be there. My guess is she does and you’ll enjoy a chat.

silverdarlings Wed 02-May-18 12:06:06

It sound that you still "click" Kitty --I think that you should

go and enjoy a cup of tea and a laugh+

Bbbface Wed 02-May-18 12:03:17

Ignore Gabrielle

She’s probably a dear old biddy that doesn’t really understand the internet and talk forums.

I’m 37 with two young children and I love getting together with by 70 year old neighbour

Having friends at different stages in life is something very positive and should be embraced

Enjoy