Technology concerns

If you’re having them for a full day then you definitely need to set limits on usage time. And get them out of the house and seeing and doing other things.

If it’s just after school then I’d let them use tablets to unwind.

I have two like this. I just asked my son if they have a limit - they don't. I'm not in the business of " changing the world" so I let them have the iPads for as long as they like. I do suggest other things, but if they decline I'm fine with it. I'd suggest that you do what their parents do.

Our GC come to stay (with their parents) in the school holidays. After one particular visit when they spent all day every day on phones and tablets, we set a 'technology rule' - to be used for no more than 2 hours a day either in short sessions or all in one go. It's sometimes difficult to enforce when their parents persist in carrying their phones everywhere with them, but our GC now play in the garden or on the beach, do crafting activities with me or play board games etc. They are more active and sociable, they laugh more and they get along together better. They are also using their technology less at home so their parents have set the same rules there.

We must be lucky here, ipads etc haven't arisen when our 7yr old GD comes. She plays with Lego, building blocks, DH plays board games with her, we often have a walk to the local charity shop, sometimes she paints. She has never asked to watch TV - ours is an old set, she probably thinks it doesn't work! If the 17 yr old comes she usually has school work to do and intersperses it with her mobile. She has a TV in her bedroom which I disapprove of. At home DD and SIL turn off the WiFi at bedtime.

BlueBelle The games you mention were not antisocial, if your mother asked you a question you could stop and answer, even show her what you were doing. Whereas for older children at least, the games on the computer seem to require their full attention.

I think you are all forgetting the hours we played with colouring books, drawing, dot to dot, dressing paper dolls head in a book I was an only child and lived on a main road where there were no kids to play out with, this is only a variety Just because it’s a different form of all those things doesn’t make it wrong only different they can play word games, interior design. dressing dolls, maths , even drawing because it’s not in the same formas we had doesn’t make it bad
I do however think they are given to kids of to young an age not necessarily because they are bad for them but I don’t think a three year old should have such expensive breakable equipment

As a child I always had my nose in a book (only child brought up in a village with only a few friends my age) however when I was old enough we used to go for long walks & explored the countryside, you wouldn't let GC do that now.

I also learnt to play cards, I still play Patience but on my laptop these days

My DGS is allowed limited time on his tablet at home & his Playstation. I don't look after him at my house so the problem of limiting time on his tablet doesn't arise. He is also an active child, loves playing football & swimming.

We are in the "our house, our rules camp" Discuss the matter by all means with their parents, but do make it clear to your grandchildren that you like having them and want to spend time doing something with them and that watching them playing on their ipads is not your idea of fun.

We have had success doing things the children's parents don't have time or the know-how to do: engraving on glass, cooking, baking etc.

In summer there are other options. Some kind of sport/dancing/music class is great for structuring the day and gets all those endorphons dancing
. If you have a little money, think of bowling or crazy golf if you have anything local.which are lots of fun.
At home have both children do a little cooking or baking.
Wet weather, then the cinema. Most have special childrens shows now. Do you play cards? A hand of cards with grandma could be very exciting.

Let there be an assumption that there will always be activity at Grandma's. Then a blast on the Ipod is down time.

I also have this problem.
Devices are not allowed at dining table ( honestly they really thought it was OK- they don't do it at home!) They are not allowed to disappear to their rooms with their gadgets so I can monitor who they are speaking to & they are not allowed up take them up to bed with them after I found my GD still playing on hers 2 hours after she went up.
Having said though I have noticed that they are using them less now & even came without them last time they stayed here. I'm hoping it was just another phase.

Definitely go for: "Grandma's house, so it's Grandma's rules". (Or "Grandma Rules!!") End of story!

I look after my 6 year old GD after school. All she wants is to play with my ipad. However the games are fun. One of them she is shown an empty room and has to chose the decor for it. Another was painting by numbers. She was choosing the colours for the picture. She does jigsaws too. To me it is her chill out time after school. Sometimes after a while she will jump up a go to play on the trampoline.

When I looked after my grandson, then aged 12, I tried to limit his time on his ipad, x box etc. One day my son said he should have a limit of 2 hours, and we should go out to the park for some of the time. My grandson, who is on the whole a pleasant, polite child, just would not stop playing on his ipad, every time I gave him a deadline he wanted to ‘just finish’ the game he was in. Eventually he put it down to get something to eat and I grabbed it and hid it. What did he do? Go to his room and start playing on his X box ( whatever that is) . In the end I turned the electricity off at the meter and told him it was a power cut. We finally got to go out and he became a normal person again for a while. When my son came home he was not amused that various things on timers were disrupted by the loss of power, and thought I should have been able to control my grandson better.. It blew over quickly but I would never bother to try and stop my GC from being on his ipad again. When I visit he is on his ipad, son watches sport on tv, neither wants to talk because it is ‘interrupting’ what they are doing. DIL goes out to yoga etc and I don’t blame her, She makes an effort to be sociable for a while after dinner, then goes to bed early to watch what she wants on the tv in the bedroom. Frankly I don’t see much point in visiting them anymore. The only time we all socialise is if we go out for a meal - but whatever sort of restaurant we go in all they want or will eat are pizzas or burgers! If this is modern family life it is very sad, no wonder there is an increase in mental illnesses and obesity, since watching tv is not social or fulfilling in itself and is usually accompanied by endless snacks and drinking. It was not always like this, at one time they did make an effort to play games and do something different.

For myself, I have no option but to read my kindle when I am with them.

Its quite good that my GC don't have their own ipads etc and they think our TV won't go till 4 30 in the afternoon so they've given up asking. They're still quite little. They play with paints, playdough, card making etc and we go for long walks and get muddy. I've got a good supply of books from the op shop. If they had their way though they'd want to spend all their time watching a screen. When they do watch tv they won't communicate at all, they completely ignore anyone talking to them.

My grandson also loves his IPad and if he could would spend all day on it but one morning he woke up early went on it and had a seizure and was taken to hospital......now it’s very limited
To how often he can go on it

My parents were very happy that my nose was always in a book. Many of which were pure entertainment, or even 'trashy'. Don't get too hung up over screens.

I've got a 3 year old and 11 year old too and they love using tablets, phone, computer or xbox. When it's after school looking after them the older one says he's tired after a day at school and the travel to and from and he gets grumpy if not allowed to play Minecraft etc most of the time. He does play nicely with the little one though for 10 minutes or so and it's only a couple of hours then until mum comes home.

If I have them all day we do something outside the house on the way home to my house, like go swimming, where there is a soft play area to climb on too. They both enjoy the water and the climbing but then there are tablets for kids to play games on next to that area! They end up on those and the 3 year old screamed all the way to the car when we left last time . The big one carried her though and I ignored it as was used to one daughter who used to have kicking on the ground tantrums, and as soon as we got home the little one was fine. She's got lots to play with there, does watch a bit of Peppa Pig, but mostly plays pretend cooking, shopping or drawing on the white board we got for her.

Just turn the internet off when they are at your home and say. ' Oh dear it's not working today, let's do........instead'. They'll soon get used to it. Why do children think they are in charge nowadays? My grandchildren do what I say when I am looking after them and they have a great time too. I have a swing at my house, lots of toys and craft materials and I spend the time to play with them.

you cant stop them using their pads/games consoles ,Its the 21st century for heavens sake not 1950! Children need these tablets etc for school work and playing on them helps them become competent .By all means set times for use but only with the parents back up .

I think a blanket ban sucjh as suggested by agnurse is unfair and would likely result in GC not wanting to visit you. Times have changed. What do their parents do?

mali24.
As its only one day a week , and you have transport, kids need fresh air not stuck in doors so weather permitting let your GC say where they would like to go for the day within reason. Take a picnic or get a take away but tablets will stay at home. If its stay indoors weather, have they paints? any board games? Tablets do not inspire children to be creative and there are alternatives in keeping boredom at bay. You need to have words with their parents as to what they can suggest .It shouldn't be left entirely to you.

I say to my grandson you can have 30 mins or 45 depending, then we will do xyz as you need to do other things. (we walk, read, homework or bake). He is 10 and although would rather be playing he does engage. I always give him a 5 minute warning when time is up and perhaps let him finish a game if that is appropriate.

When they come to my house I hide my table phone and lap top and if they asked for it they can have 20 mins each. I have lots of craft projects ready for them, they have construction toys at mine and I set competitions to build the biggest tower. the older ones make and bake. Before bed is quite time an hour with no Tv or technology just books or family board games.
I get them out to the park, messy church nature walks. The point is I distract them with other activities. They love it at mine and tell my daughter how fun it is. Nanna house nannas rules. I sometimes think putting them in front of a screen is just the easiest option.

Thirty minute timed sessions for our four grandchildren. Their parents set this time limit too. A five minute warning is always given.
But they might be allowed to use this twice a day (or even three times sometimes).
They seem happy that this is fair.

I look after two DGS’s of 4 and 10 also. Bit of a different situation, parents are separated so boys come to stay for weekends to see their father who doesn’t live with us. The iPad comes too and although the older one is sporty he says he plays on it at our house because his friends aren’t around. The little one asks to use mine and I do ration it or tell him the battery needs charging. The other grandchildren use iPads too. I suppose it’s a sign of the times and at that age I would have been the same if electronic games had been around.