What planet do men come from?

Early days of marriage , I suggested housework shared( both working full time) his response was, you look after house, I look after car! He has improved....a little .

I agree with your last comment Synonymous turn things on their head sometimes and praise for a job well done. Positive reinforcement, it works well.

I recognise that one too ginny. DH has lost some of his hearing and always says I have not said things so now I have started writing them down which is better for my blood pressure than any pills!
I have a 'Daily meal planner' now on which I write what we have planned for each meal so that when he asks I can ask him what I wrote on it. Best £1 I ever spent at Wilko's! The calendar has all the appointments written on it. I have all jobs listed (with a tick box by them for when thry are done), telephone calls etc.,etc., etc. My lists are now infamous and now when I am told that I have never said something I just point to the list.

I have also had the 'your bin' scenario which has stopped since I told him he must not use it if it is mine and to get his own if that was how he felt. I say that for anything that is suddenly 'yours' and that seems quite effective.

To be fair he does so much that I cannot complain and we have a cleaner who is a gem. I find that there is always something to complain about if you try hard enough so I now concentrate on praise which works much better and just try to make sure we communicate well.

ginny I recognise that lol.

Since DH retired I have realised that he comes from a little know planet . It is one where they know what you are going to say after you have said two words of a sentence . At this point they wander off answering a question you haven’t asked. A while later they return and swear black is white that you didn’t say any thing of the sort earlier.

It's called strategic incompetence. When I explain how necessary it is to clean the outside of the toilet, the pedestal, where men drip their wee, I'm met with sulks. Men cannot be trusted to clean properly so we women sigh and just do it themselves.

Yes mine often sits them on top of the basket lol.

Anyone’s other half actually put his dirty washing by the side of the washing hamper? This is what mine has been known to do, why he can’t pick up the lid I don’t know ?

I think Gransnet is great Pollyperkins for sharing and learning about relationships. As well as advice, sharing viewpoints, etc. Its great ?

The more i read about otger peoples husbands/partners the more I appreciate mine. He is very tidy and helps a lot and is supportive. Yes he has some irritating ways (Im sure I do too!) And we have our arguments, but the pluses far outweigh the minuses!

I remember staying at a boyfriend's flat for a weekend . On the Saturday I was looking for an earring that I thought had rolled under his bed. Oh my god ! Piled from the floor to mattress were socks and underpants , I had wondered about the musty smell . Now to my horror I'd realised why. I didn't stay a second night.

i.e. Look at the marks on the window when the suns out they always look much better when you do them.
Don't have to clean the windows now.
Hate this gloss paint always looks streaky when I do it. (no glossing for me).

Gabriella Yes we have a morning routine between us whuch is great but it doesnt cover everything. Also need to fit in on a regular basis the following- washing bathroom and kitchen floors , wooden floors, window sills, outside doors, hanging clothes+ bringing in+ folding+ ironing, cleaning fridge food shopping, wash kitchen unit doors, empty bins wash bins, clean bathroom shower toilet, cutlery drawer,dust blinds, change beds. Its exhausting sometimes. Small things add up.

This planet.

I live alone and the AC, GC and GGC all live well over 100 miles away in different directions, so rarely here for me to clean more than I do.
I do do windows weekly, vac every other day (cordless and quick) and wile everything with a microfibre cloth with a bit of windolene sprayed on it. I have 5 large mirrors plus glass side and console tables and I like them sparkling.
All in all it takes about 40 mins tops including watering houseplants and making bed/loading washing machine.
There is no dust under furniture or behind sofa cushions as I do everything regularly as I did when married with 5 children. Old habits die hard.

Its a fair compromise I think. grannyactivist. Sounds a darling. Mine is like that.

The Wonderful Man is cycling across France right now so my house is gradually being cleaned, one room at a time, in the sure and certain knowledge that it will stay that way until he returns. He is very, very untidy and just leaves things lying around all the time. However, he is also more than capable of washing, ironing, cooking and cleaning - and if he notices things that need doing he will set to with a will. He does the lion's share of work on our allotment, takes complete responsibility for the car and works endlessly on our big old house, which is a bit like the Forth Bridge and in need of constant upkeep. So, no complaints here, but I do wish he would learn to put things back in place when he's done with them.

OldMeg I assume you're joking?

Mine can’t leave the house for more than a few minutes without calling me on his mobile, for example ‘I’m just leaving Tesco/the petrol station/the allotment now’ ?...as if I’m interested.

But this weeks he’s managed to lock himself out of his mobile ??? so he’s gone golfing and I’ve no idea how long he’ll be, nor do I care!

I have no complaints about how this house is run. He does a lot of jobs around the house without me asking and no fuss afterwards. I think it was because he didn't marry or live with someone until he was in his 40s and was use to looking after himself.

Count my blessings every day, esp after reading this thread. We both retired at same time and have got into habit of he cleans downstairs and I do upstairs. Kitchen sparkles when he's finished with it but he does get twitchy when I want to use the hob when it's just been cleaned. Sadly I am a messy cook. I'm also untidy and leave drawers and cupboards ajar. I love to tidy up and get things straight but can't seem to keep them like that. In my defence, the bathrooms are usually pristine.

Yes Neilspurgeon I've heard that one too. Intelligent argument ?

I have certainly wondered not only what planet some men come from, but from which century?

Spills something. Only Hoovers that little bit -not the obvious dirt around it.

I am not bothered about that. It’s the selfishness, stupidity and sulking that get me.

Today, me: can you fill up the watering can please
Hubby: why?
Me: because you left it empty yesterday
One word MEN!