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List for Ageing

(78 Posts)
Googoogoo1 Fri 27-Jul-18 20:37:59

This came up on my Facebook feed and it just seemed so appropriate and poignant to us that I would like to share it with you. It's long but worth a read! G

Many of us are between 65 and death, i.e. old. My friend sent me this excellent list for aging . . . and I have to agree it's good advice to follow. The guy who sent this hi-lighted #19.

1. It’s time to use the money you saved up. Use it and enjoy it. Don’t just keep it for those who may have no notion of the sacrifices you made to get it. Remember there is nothing more dangerous than a son or daughter-in-law with big ideas for your hard-earned capital. Warning: This is also a bad time for investments, even if it seems wonderful or fool-proof. They only bring problems and worries. This is a time for you to enjoy some peace and quiet.

2. Stop worrying about the financial situation of your children and grandchildren, and don’t feel bad spending your money on yourself. You’ve taken care of them for many years, and you’ve taught them what you could. You gave them an education, food, shelter and support. The responsibility is now theirs to earn their own money.

3. Keep a healthy life, without great physical effort. Do moderate exercise (like walking every day), eat well and get your sleep. It’s easy to become sick, and it gets harder to remain healthy. That is why you need to keep yourself in good shape and be aware of your medical and physical needs. Keep in touch with your doctor, do tests even when you’re feeling well. Stay informed.

4. Always buy the best, most beautiful items for your significant other. The key goal is to enjoy your money with your partner. One day one of you will miss the other, and the money will not provide any comfort then, enjoy it together

5. Don’t stress over the little things. Like paying a little extra on price quotes. You’ve already overcome so much in your life.You have good memories and bad ones, but the important thing is the present. Don’t let the past drag you down and don’t let the future frighten you. Feel good in the now. Small issues will soon be forgotten.

6. Regardless of age, always keep love alive. Love your partner, love life, love your family, love your neighbor and remember: “A man is not old as long as he has intelligence and affection.”

7. Be proud, both inside and out. Don’t stop going to your hair salon or barber, do your nails, go to the dermatologist and the dentist, keep your perfumes and creams well stocked. When you are well-maintained on the outside, it seeps in, making you feel proud and strong.

8. Don’t lose sight of fashion trends for your age, but keep your own sense of style. There’s nothing worse than an older person trying to wear the current fashion among youngsters. You’ve developed your own sense of what looks good on you – keep it and be proud of it. It’s part of who you are.

9. ALWAYS stay up-to-date. Read newspapers, watch the news. Go online and read what people are saying. Make sure you have an active email account and try to use some of those social networks. You’ll be surprised what old friends you’ll meet. Keeping in touch with what is going on and with the people you know is important at any age.

10. Respect the younger generation and their opinions. They may not have the same ideals as you, but they are the future, and will take the world in their direction. Give advice, not criticism, and try to remind them that yesterday’s wisdom still applies today.

11. Never use the phrase: “In my time.” Your time is now. As long as you’re alive, you are part of this time. You may have been younger, but you are still you now, having fun and enjoying life.

12. Some people embrace their golden years, while others become bitter and surly. Life is too short to waste your days on the latter. Spend your time with positive, cheerful people, it’ll rub off on you and your days will seem that much better. Spending your time with bitter people will make you older and harder to be around.

13. Do not surrender to the temptation of living with your children or grandchildren (if you have a financial choice, that is). Sure, being surrounded by family sounds great, but we all need our privacy. They need theirs and you need yours. If you’ve lost your partner (our deepest condolences), then find a person to move in with you and help out. Even then, do so only if you feel you really need the help or do not want to live alone.

14. Don’t abandon your hobbies. If you don’t have any, make new ones. You can travel, hike, cook, read, dance. You can adopt a cat or a dog, grow a garden, play cards, checkers, chess, dominoes, golf. You can paint, volunteer or just collect certain items. Find something you like and spend some real time having fun with it.

15. Even if you don’t feel like it, try to accept invitations. Baptisms, graduations, birthdays, weddings, conferences. Try to go. Get out of the house, meet people you haven’t seen in a while, experience something new (or something old). But don’t get upset when you’re not invited. Some events are limited by resources, and not everyone can be hosted. The important thing is to leave the house from time to time. Go to museums, go walk through a field. Get out there.

16. Be a conversationalist. Talk less and listen more. Some people go on and on about the past, not caring if their listeners are really interested. That’s a great way of reducing their desire to speak with you. Listen first and answer questions, but don’t go off into long stories unless asked to. Speak in courteous tones and try not to complain or criticize too much unless you really need to. Try to accept situations as they are. Everyone is going through the same things, and people have a low tolerance for hearing complaints. Always find some good things to say as well.

17. Pain and discomfort go hand in hand with getting older. Try not to dwell on them but accept them as a part of the cycle of life we’re all going through. Try to minimize them in your mind. They are not who you are, they are something that life added to you. If they become your entire focus, you lose sight of the person you used to be.

18. If you’ve been offended by someone – forgive them. If you’ve offended someone - apologize. Don’t drag around resentment with you. It only serves to make you sad and bitter. It doesn’t matter who was right. Someone once said: “Holding a grudge is like taking poison and expecting the other person to die.” Don’t take that poison. Forgive, forget and move on with your life.

19. If you have a strong belief, savor it. But don’t waste your time trying to convince others. They will make their own choices no matter what you tell them, and it will only bring you frustration. Live your faith and set an example. Live true to your beliefs and let that memory sway them.

20. Laugh. Laugh A LOT. Laugh at everything. Remember, you are one of the lucky ones. You managed to have a life, a long one. Many never get to this age, never get to experience a full life. But you did. So what’s not to laugh about? Find the humor in your situation.

21. Take no notice of what others say about you and even less notice of what they might be thinking. They’ll do it anyway, and you should have pride in yourself and what you’ve achieved. Let them talk and don’t worry. They have no idea about your history, your memories and the life you’ve lived so far. There’s still much to be written, so get busy writing and don’t waste time thinking about what others might think. Now is the time to be at rest, at peace and as happy as you can be!

REMEMBER: “Life is too short to drink bad wine and warm beer.”

Cherrytree59 Fri 27-Jul-18 20:45:43

Or to read along advice list on how to live my life or spend my moneyhmm

PamelaJ1 Fri 27-Jul-18 20:46:19

But how will we remember?
Must print it off.

GrandmaMoira Fri 27-Jul-18 20:50:25

Very good.

janeainsworth Fri 27-Jul-18 20:51:06

It does seem to assume that we’re all well off and have achieved great things in our lives.
I particularly disliked the reference to sons & daughters-in-law who might have plans for our money hmm

PamelaJ1 Fri 27-Jul-18 21:00:52

You’re right Jane, I don’t think mine are waiting for us to die, not yet anyway! We're too useful to one of our Dd’s and not as well off as the other one.
One son in law is only15 years younger than me, statistics say he’ll die first?.

Googoogoo1 Fri 27-Jul-18 21:13:26

I think there are various points more appropriate to some than others. Some for me are spot on, some not so much. What might seem unthinkable can sadly be reality! Kudos for reading it through though, it looks a bit daunting. G

OldMeg Fri 27-Jul-18 21:19:13

Take what you want from the list....it’s your choice.

MawBroon Fri 27-Jul-18 21:21:33

Patronising!

annodomini Fri 27-Jul-18 21:45:25

We can't think for ourselves of course!

agnurse Fri 27-Jul-18 21:57:30

My dad's parents lived this philosophy. Grandma read quite a bit and was often up on current events. They watched the news and read the paper. They took trips as long as their health allowed, even taking a trip to a remote part of northern Canada. Grandma lived to be almost 90 and Grandpa lived to be about 93 or 94.

Jalima1108 Fri 27-Jul-18 22:34:50

Patronising!
It assumes we can't think for ourselves or have no common sense.

I do get rather fed up with reading all this philosophising on FB urging us how we should live our lives although this is a good point: “Life is too short to drink bad wine and warm beer.” or to read stuff like this.

Jalima1108 Fri 27-Jul-18 22:36:11

22. Get a good night's sleep
moon

Synonymous Fri 27-Jul-18 22:49:43

Thank you Gx3 smile Some of us do need more encouragement and more than others.

paddyann Fri 27-Jul-18 22:59:19

Its a bit money centric.I'm not materialistic so I wont be spending all my money any day soon ...on things or holidays .I get great pleasure from buying/doing things for my kids and GC.Last week when my kids were all on holiday we decorated and refurnished my GS's bedroom.We DID ask his mother and step father if it was OK with them before we did it.It was fantasic to see the delight when he saw it...transformed from a wee boys room to a young adults.
W e will continue to spend ON them and leave what we can FOR them because they are the centre of our world.Im not interested in holidays or handbags so please dont assume we are all the same .Some of us think our families are the most important part of our lives .

MissAdventure Fri 27-Jul-18 23:01:34

Well, I've got bugger all money, so that doesn't apply.
smile

PageTurner Fri 27-Jul-18 23:18:42

Googoogoo1, Thank you for sharing this.

MissAdventure Fri 27-Jul-18 23:20:42

Its all good advice, I think.
The kind that is given frequently, but in smaller doses on here.

annep Sat 28-Jul-18 00:15:06

I'll read it tomorrow!? goodnight.

Synonymous Sat 28-Jul-18 00:31:19

I dudn't really register the money side of things it was more the 'get up and go' ideas but then we don't have enough dough to worry about! grin

agnurse Sat 28-Jul-18 03:35:12

I don't think it's so much about money per se as it is about enjoying things. My mother told me when we got married that you should use the good china. That's what it's for! She uses her and my dad's wedding china and crystal for Christmas dinner every year.

Grandpa always said he didn't believe in having tons of stuff because the more stuff you have, the more you have to worry about it. He and Grandma preferred to invest their money in experiences - trips to places they enjoyed visiting and college funds for their grandchildren.

absent Sat 28-Jul-18 06:30:55

I think that is massively trite and second rate.

wot Sat 28-Jul-18 06:52:48

I thought it was very good and well worth reading. Thank you.

wot Sat 28-Jul-18 06:54:35

How rude and ungrateful to crtitsise what someone has bothered to write.

annep Sat 28-Jul-18 07:23:09

Mostly good common sense. won't all apply to everyone of course. And we can think for ourselves but its a reminder. Sometimes people need that.
And of course some people live for their families. Others love their families and are good to them but feel guilty if they want to enjoy their money. But why shouldnt they? And yes you may not know any but there are those who don't like to see their inheritancedisappear. I know some personally (not friends). So really you can take what applies to you. We are all different. Thanks for taking time to post..