Could DD and her daughters move closer to us?

I think it's only a legal problem if she decides to take the children abroad - but it may depend whether any specific terms had been set by the judge when they divorced

You only need permission if you are taking children abroad and 80 miles is not far. If the other family has turned against your DD, it’s the most natural thing in the world for her to move near you for both mental and physical support, if that’s what she wants to do. The father can skype and collect as agreed by them both. Staying close to the “ fire” will affect her confidence, it’s care and love she needs not being ignored and her plans over ridden when she is legally the main career. How utterly wrong and disrespectful to make arrangements without consulting your DD.

80 miles is a long way when you might be travelling up and down a couple of times a week to ensure the DC have contact with either their mother or father.

He (and his parents) have just as much right to see his children as often as mum does - lots of parents these days share the childcare arrangements - part of the week with mum and part of the week with dad. Mum can't just decide she wants to move if she doesn't consider how to maintain contact with Dad.

Agree with Muffinthemoo. Legal advice is vital. What the courts look at is very different these days and moving away may not be deemed in the best interests of the child if they have had very regular input from Dad and/or his family.

She can live and work anywhere she chooses

Nanna and SpanielNanny have the right of it as regards the basis of the law.

Your DD should see a solicitor about this matter - and in relation to untangling their financials and any joint property - ASAP.

She may need some financial help to do this if she cannot get legal aid. This may be something, if you are in a position to help her a little financially, you might want to offer her. The facts you give about her situation would raise my concerns that the other grandparents may fund any action takes re custody in order to protect their own access. This is not uncommon as in the UK it is legally difficult for grandparents to secure access in their own right.

Her position in what she does next is greatly strengthened if she takes advice before she acts.

80 miles isn't far. Our DGC live 200 miles away and we see them regularly. It is more to do with the journey. If it is either end of a motorway, it is no problem at all.

However she could move nearer without coming all the way. If she moved 60 miles closer to you, choosing the place that makes the father's journey as easy as possible, she would then be within easy reach of you and her friends and making life easy for their father.

If the move is to be made, it should be as soon as possible. It is difficult to change schools, but do it now, the younger child will be unaffected and the elder will adjust, with sensitive handling.

Having seen from a distance someone with a young baby move from her home to be near her parents the courts deemed the father had parental rights (they're not married) and granted access. She has to get the child to him twice a month at her own cost then go and collect her after the visit. There wasn't a problem with her moving however so I would think your daughter would be in the same position. Best to get legal advise first though.

Not necessarily. A friend did move "home" after a split and it was used against her in the family courts later.

She needs legal advice not forum opinion. She should be able to get 30mins free & to find a legal bod near her that specialises in family law search the Law Society website.

Best of luck

I may be wrong, but I believe that some of you have the law confused. When a baby is born to unmarried parents, the father doesn’t automatically have any parental responsibility. But once he has been named on the birth certificate he has equal parental responsibility as the mother does.

Getting legal advice couldn’t hurt. Especially given that you dd’s inlaws sound like they may be going to make things difficult. Good luck to you all.

Citizens advice have got a really helpful section on this.

If a couple can’t reach agreement they will have to ask the family courts to decide and the decision will be based on the best interests of the children.

Joint custody means that both parents share responsibility but a Residence order is something different. That is when the courts decide who a child should mostly live with.

Agnurse lives in a different country to England I think, so there well may be laws there that have to be obeyed. But not here. And definitely nothing to do with area.

I should have said all areas of England, not UK.

Surely any laws regarding access to children when a relationship breaks down would be the same for all areas of the UK.

Eighty miles away is not that far. The father could still have access at weekends. I don't see how he can prevent Alima's DD from moving if she can provide them with a stable home and family support.

He is their father. As long as he's not abusive to them, the children have at least a moral right to have a relationship with him.

Your daughter would need to check laws for her area. If the father is named he may have rights to the children and may have the right to request access. This could limit her ability to move.

I would strongly encourage that she seek the advice of a solicitor.

Just to say:
If he is named on the birth certificate as the father, then he has parental rights (since 2002)
This means he does have a say in where the children live / are educated / other rights.
If he objects, then the parents have to either come to an agreement, or take the situation to the family court. A number of factors will be considered, including travelling time and family support.
So if he has parental responsibiity, and is likely to challenge any move, your daughter might do well to seek the opinion of a specialist solicitor. It will help if she has a clear picture in her mind as to how access & visits would be managed.

Sorry door and not fair.

If they shut the fair in my face, they wouldn't get another visit, if hey arranged to take my children away without consulting he, they wouldn't be going. Good manners and civility cost nothing. If she wants to move, get the ball rolling, tell them when it's sorted, if she wants to stay, put ground rules in place.

I cant imagine anything worse

Hands up ,I have been known to shut the door on my sons ex when she drops off their daughter,she is a nasty piece of work and often turns up hours late to collect their daughter ,on one occassion 7 hours late ,meaning I missed a friends vow renewal .Maybe they have an issue with your daughter your not aware of? Dont apportion blame until you have both sides .

Agree with what has been said with regard to legal advice. It is essential in matter like this, especially where children are concerned. The fact that they are not married will probably reduce his rights, I would also think that she can move where ever she pleases within this country. On the other hand, he is their father and will reasonably want access. I can see a battle coming on, but is she prepared to fight it?

CassieJ see my earlier post.

This is what DD was told. It's her ex who moved her children aawa.

He can stop them moving away if he decides it is unfair to him and stopping him seeing his children.
I went through the same thing with my youngest, though luckily my ex agreed to the move.

Your daughter has to show it is the best interest of the children to make the move [ not her ]. She must have schools in place and a contact agreement to show that she will carry on with access arrangements.

She really needs to get legal advice with a solicitor who deals in this. If she just moves, her ex can take her to court.

If they are shutting her out now, imagine how bad it's going to get in the future? And if the father can't stand up to them, he's not going to be much help (no matter how loving a father he is). She's setting herself and them up for a miserable future. If they're not married, then the father has no legal rights over the children (sorry, but that's just how it is). A move is always difficult for children but they are far more resilient than we give them credit for (I know - I moved twice before I was 11) and it will be upsetting for them as they come to realise how their father's family is treating their Mum. Sometimes, as a parent, you have to make difficult decisions on the part of children - they'll miss his family to begin with but I'm betting that, within 6 months, they'll have made lots of new friends and their Mum will be happier too (always a bonus!)

Thank you all, there is some wonderful advice on here. Good to know that she could relocate here if she decides that would be best. Excellent idea for her getting her own solicitor. It is good to know that she and the girls will come out of this in one piece. Judy Judy, I don’t have a son. I have two daughters. One was physically abused by her nutter of a husband before she got away and is now living in safety. The elder daughter is going through a really bad time miles away from home. Her partner has the support of all of his family, now closing ranks against her.

Noone on here has said he’s a bad parent Judyjudy in fact the original post said that he is a good parent but being a bad partner does infringe on parenting and overbearing in laws shutting the door literally on the mother as she delivers the children for a visit is enough to want to get away
Children change schools all the time and whilst not ideal is certainly doable
Usually when parents live a distance apart they make it a holiday thing as obviously weekends wouldn’t be viable but if he’s travelling in his job perhaps he isn’t home all the time anyway and although the grandparents will want to see the children they have no legal rights