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Grumpy daughter .Part 2

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spabbygirl Thu 11-Oct-18 10:09:23

I would be asking her to speak to me with good manners at least, and making sure to tell her that you understand her stress but you also have feelings and don't want to be spoken to in a way in which she wouldn't speak to others.
I wish you luck, I have similar with my eldest daughter, they're almost more trouble when they're grown than when they're little!!

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crazyH Thu 11-Oct-18 09:25:03

Isnt your daughter a lucky girl to have so much help and support around her? And when she's tired, she is grumpy, and when she's grumpy, she needs a punch bag and who else but mum can take all the punches. I have a grumpy daughter too, who once went off on a tirade, because I didn't use a cutting board on her precious granite worktop. Couldn't find the cutting board, so I folded a thick teatowel and used that......but I have learnt over the years to walk away when she is in a bad mood.
I think your daughter is quite spoilt really. You should thank her lucky stars for you and her family. My daughter is divorced, with two teenagers, has to work 24/7 to provide for her children (ex husband hasn't contributed much, never did). So she probably has an excuse to get grumpy. Your daughter has no excuses.
We love our children, and so we tolerate all their faults. That's what we mothers do. Continue to support her ... what else can I say? flowers.

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Washerwoman Thu 11-Oct-18 09:02:11

Just needed a little vent again.I posted a few months previously about feeling like a punch bag every time my DD is feeling tired and grumpy -whichever way too often given that she lives close and I help with childcare at least twice a week ,including very early starts.Well things improved a lot when she reduced her hours .It was unsustainable for them as a couple given her partners very long days and early starts too.They have at times a volatile relationship,and whilst at times I feel exasperated with him I'm not blind to her faults.And I began to relax and enjoy her company again,or even fell less anxious just discussing arrangements with her.Honestly any conversation however innocent had the potential to cause offence.
Well she's pregnant again.And whilst of course in one way I'm pleased and excited,as is DH,we also are worried about how she will cope and furthermore how it will impact on us.I simply can't go through all the snipiness again.My other DDs has seen and been on the receiving end of her moods.And we're all holding our breath for how things will go with baby no 2.She's a lovely capable mum,with many good points .And I hate feeling critical of her,because she's her own worst critic .I know she doesn't need judgement but support. But she does also get a lot of help,not just from DH and I but her sisters and compared to a lot of mum's struggling with nursery drop offs,full time work, poor housing had really she has a set up many would envy.
I know I need to count to 10+ and walk away.My others DDs have told me to help only when absolutely necessary,and not offer any more.I know from previous replies my experience is shared. Just looking for solidarity as I'm about to go round to collect her dog and can tell she's not had a good night with the little one and morning sickness.Help !

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