Poor relationship with my daughter

dont take sides but support both of them

It's good to hear that you care about their relationship.
When I was going through something similar as a mum, I found my DMs words of wisdom very comforting.
She would remind me how my brother had been as a teenager and look at him now! A respectable middle aged man with responsibilities. Here I was battling with an unreasonable teen at the time
Their DGran loved them even when I found it hard.
I hope you find a way through.
Most of us survive luckily.
Welcome to GN by the way.

It’s hard to comment if you’ve had past issues with your daughter, so only you know how far you can go without doing further damage. I have always had a fractious relationship with my Mum, so I always turned to my Nan (her Mum) for advice etc and we were very close, which my mum resented. Are you able to say to your daughter that it hurts you to see them arguing so much ? If not, as others say, just be supportive to each one individually.

I had 3 teenage DDs on the go at one time - I lived to tell the tale!!

I remember this scenario so well, as others have said keep your own counsel Dottie try to support them both without taking sides. I reminded my daughter what she was like at the same age, offer advice only if asked.

I'd stay right out of it. At 15 , girls and boys can be utterly painful - you only see the nagging going on but your daughter is the one dealing with all the day-to-day problems.

All you can do is to be a listening ear to BOTH of them, not just your granddaughter. The worst thing you can do is to take sides / let your granddaughter know you are disapproving of her mother. There lies very rocky ground and you could end up with "no contact". Tread very lightly or you can lose them both.

Mothers and 15 year old daughters!!! Nightmare stuff. Try to be a supportive listening ear for both without taking sides. Unbelievably, most truly ghastly 15 year old girls grow into perfectly reasonable adults -eventually. From one who knows. Sigh.

Isn't it normal for 15 year old girls to have mother problems.they dont like being told what to do at that age and if I remember correctly they really need a lot of guidance so "nagging" is the order of most days
.My daughter was a nightmare at that age and it took a good couple of years for her to grow out of it.
Try to get her to see that her mum is very likely worried about her and its a good thing that a parent loves her and wants to keep her safe,THEN tell your daughter to try to remember what being 15 was like and hopefully they'll find common ground.
You shouldn't get involved in the arguements or decisions ,just be there as a shoulder to lean on for both.

Oh Dottie- mothers and daughters eh? This is an age old problem. I have it with mine and she has it with hers ?Actually, my granddaughter is the same age as yours - 15. Does your daughter have a partner. My daughter is divorced...her ex is a waste of space. Got some woman pregnant etc etc.
Advice.....just be there for your daughter and granddaughter...give them love and support. That's all you can do right now.

A sad situation but it sounds to me as though your daughter is stressed out about something. You don't speak of a husband/partner ?
Ask your daughter if she has any problems/worries about anything that you'd be willing to support her if you knew what was troubling her. There's usually nothing that can't be resolved one way or the other. You're all going to be ill.