Limerence ..... the shame and embarrassment of it

GrannyH50 you are not alone. Yes it happened to me and I think I must have been in my early 50s. Now I wonder if it could have been a hormonal imbalance at that age. I have never, ever mentioned it before to anyone because I also felt ashamed
I was at the time happily married but was completely in awe of this person. I kept this completely to myself. Eventually it all just faded away which also makes me think it could have been hormonal. Don't feel so bad - you are perfectly normal as I'm sure this must happen to others.

Not seen this many deletions since the day after Brexit!

I wouldn't be very pleased if my husband had a limerence .
Unless it was on me.

We are all human - having a crush on someone seems to be part of the human condition - no need for shame.

It is what you do (or more importantly not do) about it that matters.

A little bit of icing on life's cake and harmless if dealt with sensibly.

Oh dear, outside of politics I've never seen so many deleted messages in one thread.
I agree it seems a silly word to dignify a crush or fancy. It is harmless if you keep it under control and don't hurt anyone. It would be a dull world if nothing sparked our fancy now and again.

I‘m another who has never heard the word before. It seems to mean ‘infatuation’, and it has no roots or etymology whatsoever. The inventor of the word (in 1979) admitted as much. I read the Wikipedia page about it. What a lot of meaningless nonsense. A quite unnecessary new word.

Yes, I have had infatuations on and off for most of my life, though not for many years now. It’s pretty harmless.

Then why the shame and embarrassment ?
Does that mean I’ll have to take down my David Cassidy posters?

not photo, women

I don't see why everyone's getting in a Tizz about it. I googled the word and it just means 'taking a fancy to someone'- what's wrong with that.....men and photo of 70+ are limerencing all over the place so why not someone in their 50s. Good luck !

Hello Granny, I saw this word for the first time the other day and had to check it up! I don't think the feelings have anything to do with our age but our emotions. If you have warm feelings for someone surely that means you are capable of feelings. Good for you! I am not sure why you need to feel embarrassed unless you made your feelings known.

I think, Maw we may have to dream up another tag word - the current one is triggering deletions methinks. Think I'll change into my pj's now

Two harmless posts deleted on this very silly thread?
I did suggest OP might read through the one I gave a link to.
Other than that, what else is there to say?

GrannyH
Have you heard the expression ^ when in a hole, stop digging^
Now is the time.

GrannyH I'd bow out gracefully if I were you. You haven't had the responses you wanted (whatever they were ?) so you may as well give up.

Another example of a belittling reply.

Message deleted by Gransnet. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

It means a crush? But you said crush in your post why give it such a strange name ?

Sorry but why do you need understanding for developing a crush ? It’s quite normal. Well I hope it is

GrannyH you say you are over its so what ever ‘it’ was forget about it, hearing others stories won’t help you
Have a glass of vino, snuggle up to your husband and dream about your grandkids
And no most people on here aren’t nasty they will be very kind caring and helpful to anyone with a problem but let’s be honest yours isn’t a problem is it

I’m not sure why you are so upset at the responses as you really told us nothing in your first post, apart from using a word we didn’t understand. Obviously in a public forum, too much detail is unwise, but all we know is you had some kind of “crush” or obsession with someone and feel embarrassed about it. Or maybe I’ve completely misunderstood.

Haha, think you may have hit the nail on the head there Elegran ???

Then may I (politely) suggest you follow Elegran’s advice and walk away - both from the situation and the thread.

Please leave me alone. You have no idea how you’ve made me feel. I was looking for understanding. I’m so upset, you’ve no idea.

As you are over it now, the best thing to do is to put it behind you and forget it. No need to get other people's stories and chew them over, that just collects them together for voyeurs to pore over and pass around their friends for a giggle. You don't want that to happen, do you? Do You?

You admit to feeling ashamed and embarrassed.
Why is this I wonder?
Could it be because you recognise that your feeling and behaviour might have been inappropriate?

So why are you surprised if others think the same?

smug ?