Sunday lunch today

Don’t feel bad Hilmix, you are not alone. There are times my feelings get hurt after slaving away at fixing some special dinner only to receive the “It’s ok” verdict. Not sure why I bother to try either, but I do. My husband is a meat and potato kind of guy and a picky eater. I know this so I need to just quit trying to change his eating habits. We need to slap their quick fix dinner in front of them and eat our own prepared feast. They are like children sometimes and we need to pick our battles.

What a nasty way for him to behave after you went to so much trouble, I have a kind and generous husband who treats me with respect but a response like that would have seen his meal being tipped in the bin that's for certain!

Don't let him treat you like this and make you feel inadequate and upset, None of us are perfect but a little kindness goes a long way X

I don’t do roast Sunday lunches unless extended family are coming over. Otherwise it’s chops or sausage and mash.My husband has never appreciated my cooking which is still better than his mother’s was...e everything that woman touched came out of a tin or packet...it’s how he was brought up and he’s seems not to appreciate fresh meat and veg and the preparation that goes into it. Even after forty years he would prefer a ready meal. I think it must be sloppy veg and salt content that attracts him. I have been told by my daughter and grandchildren and friends that I am an excellent cook...my son has surpassed me now I think and my son in law runs me pretty close.

I think I would be telling him to cook his own lunch in future!

Your husband sounds a right misery hilmix, if you can take the trouble to cook a special meal then he can take the trouble to eat it.
But oh dear, isn't Leonard Cohen a bit miserable? I think I'd need something jollier to lift my mood.
He can cook his own damn dinner if he's so fussy. True, there's a lot of sadness in this world but his attitude makes your world feel unhappy. Tell him to buck his ideas up.

Well hillmix my hubby can be inclined to moan a bit but my answer to him is 3 moans and i wont be cooking that meal again since most of what i cook are his favs he usually shuts up

Hilmix you say you started early with your Sunday lunch preparations in an effort to please your husband.

I would like to ask you - what does he do in an effort to please you?

You could let him know that his comments made you feel.... unappreciated, disrespected and unloved. If he doesn't apologize or otherwise make it up to you, then suggest he cook for himself going forward, because you just quit!!

My husband does that ALL THE TIME. Nothing’s ever “quite” right, there is always one bit that lets the meal down. And if there miraculously isn’t, I am asked for a different mustard, another knife, a beer, etc., or told the meal is cold (on its red hot plate that he can’t touch)! Always something I must get up for. And it’s no good saying “Let him do it”, because going anywhere involves using the walker, which is a pain in the bum! So now, before I do sit down, I tell him to look at the table and tell me what’s missing as I really am not getting up again!?

Next Sunday tell him he can make the lunch while you watch tv, then complain about everything he's cooked.

I could only think of one reply and that being to tell the miserable, ungrateful * to prepare and cook it himself.

'Maybe me having my choice meant I had to be punished. Who knows?' - I'm sorry but have you got 'victim' tattooed on your forehead! If you think you deserve him to treat you this way, without standing up for yourself, then perhaps, in a subconsciously your allowing him to do so. Next time cook your own and let him cook his. There is no difference between badly behaved adults and badly behaved children -they need to learn lessons!

Get him to take you out to lunch from now on....you definitely deserve to be looked after.

Can I come and have Sunday lunch at your house? I promise not to criticise. ?

As he enthused over the shop bought pudding and synthetic cream, maybe you should buy him ready meals instead of going to so much effort ?

Unkind, ungrateful and unreasonable springs to mind! I think I'd be telling him to cook it himself next time!

What an ungrateful, miserable old sod he sounds, Hilmix. Next Sunday, suggest he takes you out for a Roast and let him pay and see how that suits him! I certainly would not be spending all morning preparing a meal, only to be criticised when it was served up. Keep listening to dear old Leonard and have a few glasses of something nice! If the old misery refuses to go out for lunch, just get some microwave dinners and see how he likes that! Or tell him to cook it himself. Good Luck and don’t let him treat you in this way. xx

Was the meal your choice? if not take it in turns to have what he wants one week and what you want the next. Personally as the cook since my dh is useless in the kitchen I give him a couple of choices from what I want to do and it is simple or complicated depending how much time or how I am feeling or what I fancy. I like a roast dinner myself so he is lucky but at least dh rarely complains or if he does I don't feel it's my fault. If he likes his vegetables cooked to a pulp then take yours out first how you like them and leave his in for a bit longer. Just don't let him get to you. If he says the steak is tough tell him you won't buy it from that shop again. Give him a sharp serrated steak knife everytime and ask him if there is something wrong with his teeth as perhaps that's where the real problem lies and why he's behaving like a grumpy old git. Do soft meat like chicken another time, no more steaks since he can't eat them!!

Hilmix, I suggest you buy your husband a ready roast cooked meal from M&S or Sainsburys. You cannot then be blamed as to how it has been cooked!! You can then have what you want, cooked the way you like it!

Give him a cookery book to read!

Pubs do some super Sunday lunches now and no washing up. My friends all widowed or divorced stopped cooking on Sunday when we became independent. It's a day off for goodness sake.

I’m a useless cook anyway but I seem to enjoy it more now that we have a new kitchen. My hubby hardly ever complains because I used to say “well if you don’t like my cooking then do it yourself”! We take in turns now and whoever doesn’t do the cooking, does the washing up!

Hi, not wishing to scare or upset anyone, but my dad started like this and would complain about savoury foods but devour sweet stuff as if it was going out of fashion. He sulked like a child. It turned out he had Alzheimer's, so start keeping a log of his behaviour and see if there is a pattern. Sorry you had to endure this kind of upset after putting in so much effort. Your listening to your choice of music might have upset his balance of 'normal', just a thought. Good luck.

It is never about what it seems to be. He is down, emotionally tired or sad. I eeds when I feel depressed or down, nothing pleases me. So, the real issue needs to be addressed. Find out what that is and his meal will be good.