@BlueBelle - I think you have read between my own obscured lines to be honest, for which I thank you.
My relationship falls into the better than nothing category to be honest. And, yes, I have thought hard about what I'm doing.
I am actually very busy with many things, even aside from full-time work and I am not short of acquaintances. I suppose I am jealous in some ways - that these other women seem to be having a better time socially that I am.
For now, I'll stay on the sidelines until I feel strong enough to take some positive action.
Thanks all for your comments and suggestions.