Would love to find a partner

I’ve been on my own just over a year I do miss having someone to do nothing with, and holidays etc but I do like that I make all my own decisions and don’t want to go through the loss of a beloved partner ever again so I’ll stay happily single.

I met my OH 15 years ago through a newspaper ad as online dating was in its infancy then. There were no photos to look at so I did meet a few ‘unsuitables‘prior to hooking up with Mr Right! ? I would say go for it but proceed with caution! We have been happily married for 11 years now.

Oops should have previewed that - I am now 56!

I'm single and while I am lonely I realise I've lived too long on my own and it does seem to me most available men in my age range are looking to date women in their forties or younger.

I married young and was divorced by 35 in 1998. I've been on my own since then (now ages 46). Eventually I tried online dating. On reflection I met a couple of wonderful men in all of that but was too damaged by my marriage to see that. I'd encourage anyone who wants to, to try to seek companionship.

Yes Happygirl79 I agree with you. I am with third husband and its as good as any other marriage I suppose but if I was single I wouldn't bother with men any more.

Dublin29, yes there are difficulties when it's assumed that you have an 'other half'. I divorced my first husband and the second died young.

I can remember being upset in a card shop (getting an 8th birthday card) rejecting the 'For our dear daughter on her birthday' ones. Then, no more invites to any 'couples' do.

A wedding invitation from my niece for me and my ex boyfriend (I'd moved on) came as a surprise. At the time, I was dating somebody fifteen years younger than me (and, I suspect, the 'wrong colour') obviously unsuitable for her special day photos! I just went with my children, of course.

More recently, my friend (who has always been single) came with me on a weekend break. I'm sure that the people at the B&B thought we were a lesbian couple!

I was happily married for over 50 years. Now I am happily single, loving the freedom and independence.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

That was a lovely post hallygirl79 I’ve got friends married and widowed.Have seen both sides of the coin.

MaggieTulliver - you will find someone to fit the bill I'm sure - you're still young and I have never believed that marriages (relationships) are made in heaven. As a counsellor I know that not to be true - but you have two choices and one may bring you a relationship sooner than the other. Getting out and about is obviously what you're doing now but as you know, becoming a member of a choir, joining a book club, or a board game group, or being a regular visitor to your local library or community centre will not necessarily expose you to someone who is looking for the same thing as you are - so that's a waiting game but has the advantage of allowing you to see a potential 'friend' in several situations before you make the decision to go for it. The other alternative which people have spoken of is to advertise yourself, either via online dating or a simple ad in the local newspaper. One thing about doing it this way is that you can be as straightforward as you want and can say you don't want friends with benefits or the mad axe man - you have the power to say no before you meet someone and to say no afterwards if you want. So it's a question of whether you trust yourself to make judgements that will be good for you in the long run, and not whether the people you meet will be genuine and want the same as you - you can say what you want. I've never used a dating site but I would in your position, and I have a relative who met his second wife that way (20 years ago). It's worth a try - why not do that as well as getting out more?

Getting a dog is a great idea - you meet masses of people walking dogs, quite often men on their own, so is joining a group - a widowed friend of mine met her new chap with the local rambling group - but you need to find something that interests you. You probably won't meet any potential new partners in a sewing circle! Volunteering is another way but online seems to work for lots of people. It is worth asking people what site they used. A lot of my country friends have used Muddy Matches! - and with great success.
Good luck with it and hope you find someone nice

Hetty58 so refreshing to read your comments. I know we’re all different & individual, but I wonder how much us 50-60 + age group, want a partner as society expects it? Many things are aimed at couples, likely due to marketing & business/profits interests. In some ways, I find it sad & annoying that just because you are not part of a couple, you’re somehow inferior/less than? This is just not the case.

You could end up like Hector11 with some new partner leaving his or her mess all over his nice previously tidy house lol. Just joking. Hope you find a nice companion.

I would like the same, but on looking around when i am out in town,i feel like i am in the film Cocoon,
Although i am the age i am most of the men i see seem old, and i mean act old,
This town is full of old people retiring here,
The council are trying to attract younger people, in some way

I was widowed in 2016 just after my 60th birthday & couldn't imagine finding love again. However I missed companionship & adult conversation ( my daughter & 3 young grandchildren live with me so I wasn't lonely), but our house is always like bedlam. With trepidation I joined a dating site & had a couple of outings which were non-starters, then I met a lovely man, who had been widowed after 30 years of marriage & then had a disastrous short lived marriage. We've been together now for 14 months still living in our own houses 20 miles apart, but spending at least 3 nights a week together. I consider myself very lucky to have found him. I'd say 'go for it' - happiness might be just around the corner. Good luck x

I've just given up on something like round 3 of the dating websites - I tend to do 6 months on, take a break, try again and see if anyone else new and local has popped up.
I would avoid the free sites like the plague - there are of course good men on there, but it feels like they're swamped with weirdos and scammers. The Guardian and Saga sites are the best IMO.
I've found a couple of good friends, but no-one where the attraction was mutual. Living out in the countryside, I have literally run out of men on these sites within a half-hour drive or so. I'm contemplating giving the whole palaver up and getting a dog - it has to be cheaper...
Good luck in your search, Maggie!

My advice would be go for it (carefully) but don’t move in together! There are a lot of pitfalls e.g. financial, property etc especially if you have children. Remember that people change and their true colours may not appear for quite some time, unless you are one of the lucky ones. Make sure you have a lot in common, especially your values. Good luck.

MaggieTulliver. Given your age assume you are still in work. Lots if friendships start through the workplace, is this not a possibility for you. Seems newspaper adds are popular with good results, perhaps they keep the catchment area to a more local level and you may have mire in common. That you are thinking about it surely means you should go for it.

I’m not being flippant here, but seriously suggest that if you want some unconditional love and devotion, get a dog! They’re also a great way of meeting other people - dog walkers/other pet lovers, keeping fit and seeing some beautiful countryside on walks. Building the bond with an animal, and working on training together so that you are both ‘in tune’ is really life enriching.

I'm 61 and have been on my own since my marriage broke up 36year ago. I didn't intend to stay single but I was too busy raising my 3 sons to go dating. Now it's a case of I like my independence and not having to consider anyone else in my plans. Don't get me wrong there are times I would like someone to do things with, go places talk to but after so long on my own I'm not interested in the process of dating. If you have the opportunity I would say go for it!

It can't be true that all single men of your age are undateable OP.
Everyone has their own take on partnership and relationships.
I would say TRY online dating. There are many different sites for seniors and some for interests you may have in common. DO have an idea of what you will and won't put up with. DO be realistic about the type of man who is likely to be single at this age.
Here's an idea... apply for the TV show First Dates??
Whatever you do, make sure it's on YOUR TERMS. Life really is too short to be unhappy ?

Go for it! Nothing to lose...but just be careful if you meet someone online that you don’t put yourself at risk in any way when you first meet up..Goodluck!

Married twice. 2 grown up children 3 grandchildren
Blissfully single.
No one can spoil my life because they are grumpy and unfaithful
I am 66 and happier and more content with my life than ever before
Good luck there may be a partner out there for you as you are open to meeting someone.
I just couldn't.
Too much hurt and pain in the past
But life is beautiful if you can share it with someone special too

well I am a lot older than you, but hey wants wrong with female companionship? that is what I like ....likeminded people, the gender is immaterial,, o.k. I have no need for sex... but there is nothing wrong with that,,,, if you want sex.. but be careful!

Is Guardian Soulmates still going? Those ads often sounded interesting.
I'm not single and not looking but I go to a couple of Blues clubs locally and I noticed there are quite of lone men so that kind of thing might be worth a go. And music venues are pretty good for women turning up on their own, I think. I've met lots of lovely people at the ones I go to - both men and women. Good luck!