Travel to see daughter and GD

Do you get on well with your daughter? If you are on good terms, I think you could possibly ask her if she could come twice a year.

If you explain that it is getting harder for you, she is likely to understand.

I hope things work out.

Have you tried turmeric for arthritis pain? There is a facebook group about organic turmeric powder being taken as a ''golden paste'' - mixed with organic coconut oil, organic freshly ground pepper and water. Also given to dog and other pets for arthritis.

Sometimes when you keep in touch regularly on the phone you almost forget that you haven't physically seen the person. Keep chatting on the phone!

I empathise with you.
I am now 82 and my D lives a similar distance so I see little of them.
We are both now on our own and I would like to see more of her but she works very long hours to manage and has two teens.
I have a knee replacement and an scheduled for a hip replacement in Feb.
I have accepted that it is as it is and make the most of it.

I wouldn't fancy a three-train journey. Perhaps you could explain how it's getting more difficult and that, sadly, you feel you can't do it as often. Maybe you could stay a day or two longer instead.

Meeting in the middle, as sodapop suggests, is something that we do. We tend to do it as a single day out, but a couple of nights in a town where there are things to do might be really enjoyable.

It does seem quite an arduous journey London1948 could you compromise and each visit the other twice a year. Failing that maybe meet somewhere halfway for a short holiday instead of one of your trips.

Is your partner her father?
How long have you been together?
Why is he so invested in this subject?
Have you talked to your dd about the frequency of visits and whom goes to whom?
How old is your dd and her dd?

Have you spoken to her about it? Is she financially able to travel more often? Does her partner create a problem for her if she goes away? There could be any number of reasons why she doesn't come more often.

Hi, London! So sorry about your worsening arthritis! Are you receiving treatment for it?

Regardless, I can imagine how difficult that triple trainride must be. On the other hand, I know it can be difficult for a young mum to travel w/ a child. Besides, no matter what your partner thinks DD (dear daughter) should do, most likely, she's going to do what SHE thinks she should/needs to do. You could ASK her to visit more often, but chances are, she'll decline.

So, IMO, any change will have to be on your side. I suggest cutting back on your visits (w/o insisting that she increase hers). Right now you go to her 4 times a year or more. Perhaps cut back to twice a year and stick to that for a while? See how you feel? It will mean you only see DD and GD in person 4 times a year (their 1 visit and your 3), but it might make things easier for you. Maybe let DD know you're going to try cutting back b/c of your arthritis, but it's not written in stone. If the 3 visits are still too much, you might cut back to twice a year, etc. Or you might add that 4th visit back if you miss them too much and DD is ok w/ it.... Food for thought...

If you enjoy going to see your daughter and are able to do it, then why not? If it is becoming a struggle then you may not be able to manage - but many parents do not see their adult children more than once or twice a year.

Maybe your husband is concerned you are doing too much travelling and is trying to persuade you to cut down by encouraging your daughter to make the trip. Does she have children who would be accompanying her?

There is no rule as to how often a daughter should visit her parent, or vice versa. It can only be a mutually decided solution. Do you think your daughter would come to you if you asked? Why haven't you already asked her?

There's only you knows if it's worth the effort or if the knee pain is making it all too much.
Why don't you talk to your Daughter and ask her, if there came a time when you couldn't physically manage the quarterly visits, could she perhaps visit you more often.
I hope it works out for you.