Fussy eating grand daughters

I would cook something I know they really like but not for them, just give them bread and butter.88)))77

We have our grandchildren every other weekend. I have a number of strategies that seem to work well.

1. We have a policy of encouraging them to try everything, if they don’t like it that’s fine, but they are praised (but not pushed) for trying new things.
2. I give them a couple of choices about what they have for meals (prior to cooking) saying you can have X or Y (from things I know they like).
3. I don’t overload their plates but they know more is available if they want it.
4. Bits and bobs, plates with lots of little things on, tiny sandwiches, a cube of cheese, a few cherry tomatoes, carrot sticks, a few crisps, not too much and enticing.
5. If they are unwell they eat what they want.
6. Yoghurt and fruit are offered when they’ve eaten a reasonable amount of food.
7. We eat together, even if I want to eat later I sit with them and have a cuppa, meals are sociable occasions we enjoy together.
8. I don’t make a big deal of it if they don’t eat - they won’t starve.
They are 8, 5 and 3 and the above seems to work well, but maybe I am just blessed with lovely Grandchildren ?

I think children have very simple likes and taste buds are undeveloped so trying to make them like strong meat or spicy food or strange textures is a highway to nothing.
Bland and boring works best. It works for oldies too.
Gt grandpa loves my pancakes.
I can still remember being force fed carrots as a child and vomiting!
Never have battles over food. No child will deliberately starve itself. Relax and don't try so hard.

DGC is the child who asks politely for toast at parties. They also came out of school with a ‘Very Fussy Eater’ badge in the first week. I guess that prevented over zealous dinner supervisors from hassling them!

i don't like dairy free ice cream either. It is not nearly as nice as proper ice cream. Unless they are also dairy intolerant why not let them enjoy normal ice cream and keep dairy free for dil. Cook and offer food as normal if they refuse make nothing of it. Do not offer sandwiches or alternatives.

Granarchist I’m surprised that the toddler didn’t appear to be welcome in the French restaurant. I have always found the French very accommodating of children, who usually eat whatever the adults are having. No chicken nuggets on most of their menus!

It's a funny life isn't it, I've just seen an article in the paper which says overweight people are being allowed to join the Army. My grandson passed his exams for the Air Force but failed the medical because he was underweight.

Does fussy equate with “spoilt” Nanny 41?

My 4 year old DGD has become very fussy recently. She sleeps over once a fortnight and we have her and her 16 month old brother the next day. I just don't worry. Her mum was fussy at that age. At the moment she loves cereal and milk and also macaroni cheese. It will probably be something else next week. At home her mum is stricter and she has to have one or two mouthfuls of "proper" food. But I am her gran. It is my job to make her feel really happy, at ease and loved when here. One idea, her mum got my DGD a plate from Aldi. It was like a pathway with lots of little compartments. The final one had a little cover on it and was for a special treat. The child has to eat a bit from each section before reaching the hidden treat.

I agree with grannygravy advice, just do a simple buffett

I'm with the "if you dont like it - leave it" but definitely no cooking separate things for different people. Luckily my two DGDs are still at the eating everything stage to the extent that the 3yr old came to a restaurant in France with us and there was only a tasting menu of about 7 courses! She ploughed through pretty much all of it to the extent that the patron came out to applaud her efforts. He had looked very unhappy at this crazy English family bringing a toddler to his restaurant but her efforts to eat whatever came out next won him over completely!!!!! No doubt she will start to be fussy at some point but luckily not yet.

All our yoghurts were - the wrong flavour orcthe right flavour but wrong brand!
Oh goodness, ours always thought it very exciting and a privilege to be allowed one of 'Grandad's yogurts'

They are very special

I try to serve meals that I can dish up at the table and ask one of the parents to serve their kiddies. I check privately with parents what will be eaten before visits and am just very matter of fact on the day. I initially made the mega mistake of trying to please everyone and ended up having my food go cold whilst first GC ruled the roost. I could have screamed, mum & dad cajoling this master manipulator to try this or that, could he have something else? ,(Id already been given a list of approved toddler meals, snacks and drinks, all pre prepared and expensive,) What else had we got? All our yoghurts were - the wrong flavour orcthe right flavour but wrong brand! We don't play these games any more. We check they eat it normally and don't get offered snacks instead, if they make a good effort they get a well done & can either have the same as us for pudd or ice cream in a cone usually with a mini flake or jelly baby stuck in. They still try it on though and I must admit doesn't make for stress free meals.

Be relaxed because it might make parents stop coming for meals if you stress them all out. Just ask the parents (not in front of kids) what to do. It sounds like you want control and it's making you upset that you don't have it. Don't feel hurt. They are kids. Whatever little control they get, they like. So give them the option to choose, buffet style and make zero fuss. Perhaps the bread and butter can be put out along with all the other options. Then the kids see they don't have to hold out to get whatever they really want. They might select more than just bread and butter that way. The kids won't starve, but they might purposefully stop eating at your house. If you persist and insist, they WILL resist.

Such spoilt children, give them bread and butter,like it or leave it.

Ignore them at meal times. If they complain just say you know they don't like ????. They will neither say 'I Do' or just not bother. Don't stress over it. They will surely grow out of the phase.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

I buy in exactly what the list I am given says, and stand back and watch them refuse it. Then they are gone and we don't waste anything any more.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

My almost three-year-old GD used to polish off anything, and loved salads, vegetables and fruit. Within the last few weeks she has suddenly become very picky, and wants to eat mainly cheese, chicken, hard-boiled egg and crackers. She refuses all veg and fruit with a ‘don’t like it.’
I think it may partly be due to a lot of upheaval over the last two months. I have stayed with them since November, and so have my SIL’s Peruvian parents and brother, who speak only Spanish. Perhaps taking control over what she will eat is her way of dealing with all the unsettling changes.
I’m hoping that, once they are back to normal again, she will revert to her healthy eating habits again.
The suggestions you have received are mainly very sensible ones. We are just ignoring GD’s fussy habits and I’m sure that they will all start to eat normally soon.

Marjgran I agree and you sound like a very lovely Nan/Gran

Oh goodness some replies are so intolerant. My brother (pushing 70) was the pickiest eater. Not just a current problem. I pity some of these grandchildren, treated like creatures to be broken in.

PS Forgot to say - don't fuel the problem by giving them lots of attention around this issue but don't forget to praise any behaviour that you're happy with.

This is often a phase that kids go through when they learn the power of refusing food! You can't force them to eat and parents/grandparents are generally anxious for them to - so it's a win/win situation for the children (they are in charge, for a change!) I agree with others - don't make a big thing of it.

Why not ask them if they would like a little peanut butter with their bread and butter?

There are a lot of nourishing additions to bread and butter ,and some delicious breads. Just ask the children what they would like. If they won't eat they wont eat.