Daughter appears not to like new man

You say you get on with your daughter. In your position, I would ask her straight out if there was something she disliked about your new partner.

Let's hope she hasn't really got an answer for that one.

Unless she comes up with a good reason, there is no excuse for her to be "off" with him.

What does her brother think about her behaviour?

Some excellent answers here but I think I might be tempted, if it were my DD, to try to talk to her about how you feel. It must be horrid to feel hostility between 2 people you care for but you should not be treading on eggshells to appease the younger one.

It will be hard for her not to be jealous but that is what it sounds like. Not an easy time to meet people either so double reason to feel resentful. I hope for all your sakes that she can move on when the end of lock-down comes and I am sure she will then appreciate you much more.
One word replies indeed!
I get those as texts from my DD.

I expect it comes down to jealousy that she now has to share you after all those years she had you attention. At 22 she is not a child but maybe she’s been allowed to behave like one. Which seems to be what she is now doing. As for someone commenting that one word responses are not rude! I think most people would say they are very rude and a very passive aggressive way of makeing someone feel very uncomfortable. Try to ignore her as your partner is doing and don’t whatever you do let her spoil this happiness you have found. It’s not easy to find so make it your priority. Shell move on to a life of her own which she should make her priority and leave you to your life.

Thank you for all your replies and thoughts. In answer to a couple of questions:

Yes, my daughter does still have a good relationship and sees her dad regularly (not at moment of course) and co-incidentally she did have a serious boyfriend but they broke up just as I met my partner so not the best timing and I think there may be an element of jealousy as we used to do lots together and don't so much anymore although I try to make time and do special things with her too as much as time and finances allow. Also, I've told her that we have no plans to move in together so she shouldn't be feeling anxious about that.

I think I will just try not to worry so much about it, what will be, will be after all and, as someone said, I can't force things either way. They will just have to get on with it to some degree and hopefully it will all work out in the end.

Thanks again Gransnetters.

My daughter has a history of being jealous of anyone I'm close to. She did in fact have quite an unhealthy degree of attachment to me UNTIL she had a baby. Now she's less bothered about my partner. She still dislikes him in theory but has no real interest in being unpleasant anymore.

I just don't combine the two of them. I spend time with him, frequently (usually, not at the moment) with my grandson. Daughter has no objection to it and sees it as a good thing.

I'd just try to ignore it. If she isn't being actively rude, pass her off to him as a stroppy teenager. At some point her own life will take over for her and she'll be less bothered about what you/he are getting up to.

Does she have a romantic relationship of her own?
Maybe she's just jealous.

I'd say try not to worry or try too hard. She'll find her own level with your partner.

About your title: it is not correct.

Your dd seems to like your new partner just fine.

Please dont tell her she doesn't like him because she is not as giddy buddy buddy with him as you would like her to be
You are the one in love with him, remember?

He is your partner and there is a romantic bond between both of you.

Your dd is an adult and she can decide what kind of relationship she has with him.
He is not her partner, you are.
Just because you are with him, it doesnt have to translate into an instant happy family.

You have a relationship in mind you would like your dd and your partner to have. That's not the one your dd wants to have.
If you force your idea, you will spoil the chances of them getting along in the future.

Step back. Dont interfere.
Let them get to know each other in the way they are comfortable, at their own pace and decide how they want to behave around each other.

You can’t make someone like someone, as long as she’s not outwardly rude to him just ignore it she should be moving out soon if she’s 22 anyway I personally wouldn’t talk to her
it ll put her back up even more and look like your taking his side pretend it s not happening don’t get too hurt on his behalf unless he starts complaining to you about something really rude One word answers aren’t really rude it’s just not engaging
Your son likes him so one out of two ain’t bad

Leave her be. Don't try too hard or pester for an answer.
She's 22y and will be off one day soon on a path of her own making.
Is it worth a falling out now?

Your partner seems ok with it, so go with the flow!

I'm glad your happy

You need to have a straight talk with your daughter Notsgranyet12 she is an adult not a child to be humoured You have been divorced a long time so deserve a chance of happiness.
If she does have a problem with your new partner then she needs to be up front and talk to you about it. I'm sorry but find this selfish behaviour from your daughter, maybe it's time for her to move on and be independent.

It’s lovely you have met someone nice after so long. Children even adult children can be awkward sometimes but unless there is something specific your dd has against him then assume it’s just as calendargirl says.
Don’t be tempted to end your relationship because of this.

No experience of this sort of thing, so just observations from your post.
Does your daughter still see and have a good relationship with her dad?
Is she worried that if you do move in together, she might be expected to move out?
If you are close with her, she could just be resentful after 10 years that you have met someone else, and she would rather you haven’t? We’re all a bit selfish at times, and she might be thinking of her own happiness before yours. Of course, it might be different if she then met someone and the positions were reversed.