Mambypamby, your problem sounds very familiar to me and my experiences with past relationships. For a few years now I have been single and have tried to work on my need for unconditional love from someone, as I found that when it has come up in relationships it has been a very painful experience, but that I can learn to 'parent myself' and be happy within my own self. I feel that those who have very happy relationships are the lucky ones, most people seem to find varying degrees of dissatisfaction with partners. I think not expecting too much from another flawed human is a good starting point - the rest we need to provide for ourselves. There is much we can do - cultivating close and supportive friendships, developing skills and talents and relaxing hobbies, even, if you are that way inclined following a spiritual path. Well, this is all stuff that helps me. Having said that, I would love to be in a good relationship with a partner, but not prepared any more to put up with a bad one, so am being very careful in my choices. Good luck with your life.