Baby’s name could break up my family

Collecting DGS from school 2 weeks ago there were a group of women coming from a local nursery with little ones. One little boy ran ahead and his Mum shouted on him, Adolf, I kid you not I was so surprised I stopped to hear more.
Now that choice would worry even me.

Is the OP a member of the royal family?
Would you really cut off your grandchildren because the parents didn’t use the name you chose?
Is this a wind up?

I am trying to think of the worst surname in history Dilly.

For goodness sake don't encourage this pettiness within your family normskill parents can name their children whatever they want. Enjoy your grandchildren and don't stress about such things.

I chose plain names for my sons that can’t be shortened. Plain but they have a terrible surname so I couldn’t saddle with something that would cause more teasing on top of having one of the worst surnames in history.

Welbeck, I certainly hope it is a wind up, I have seen and commented on a few of the MIL/DIL posts recently I think you’re referring to, but I actually can believe this one. My own mum broke the traditional naming conventions for her family with my brother and I and it caused a ruckus in her family for years! I also had pressure put on me about my own kids names and now regret not giving my DD the middle name I wanted because I caved to family pressure, so she only has her given first name and no middle name at all

is this a wind-up.
there seem to be a run recently as if competing for the most unreasonable, or should i say unbelievable, GM/MIL.

I don't think any expectant parents should feel obligated to give their child a name that follows a family tradition, there are too many children saddled with names they have to spend their whole lives explaining. I can't stand silly, faddish names or individualised spellings either, but that's another topic!

MawB my mum's name was Gladys Hilda.

She hated it. Apart from her family and closest friends, she was known as Mrs. H........
We used to laugh with her, we said she must have had a wicked mother.
Shame really as her sisters had pretty names.

The parents of the baby are your son and dil.

Not you, not your daughter, not an uncle, etc.

They name their baby and you, your daughter or anybody else has no input in it.

If this is the event that breaks your family, the family is not very strong to start with.

Watch out with making it a big deal as you may jeopardize the relationship with the child and the mother.

Perhaps your DD's name is not a name which either your DiL or DS like Normskill?
As others have said, you have no say in their choices. Sorry.
My MiL has always enjoyed suggesting awful names for DGC and now her DGGC. She's incorrigible.
She wanted me to call my DD Blanche.
I didn't

my son told me and he’s conflicted between appeasing his wife and considering his sister’s feelings

Unless his sister was there during conception she can but out and he better get his priorities straight ASAP.
They both agreed to GS name. And they both get to agree on GD name. If your daughter wants children named after her she is free to go and create said children, birth them and name them herself.

Oh for goodness sake. Let the parents decide whatever name they wish for THEIR baby. Maybe you wont like their choice but it's not for you to choose. Just be happy for them and look forward to all the wonderful granny times you will have.

I hope the advice others have given here have given you food for thought OP, it would be such a shame for such a lovely event to be overshadowed by petty bickering over a name.

If your DD has an issue my advice would be to steer well clear and let her sort it out with her brother. Getting involved in any squabble could cause a serious rift - they’re both adults let them deal with it.

It has long been tradition in Scotland that family names are given as middle names ,there are at least 12 men and boys with my late dads name ,mainly because he didn;t have a son to give it to
.Our children didn't follow the tradition and our gd'S have names of their own with no family connections my GS has his GGF's name as his middle name but that was because my mum was still alive and used emotional blackmail on my daughter .As she did !

We have two sons.

Before we even met, my husband always thought that if he had a son he would like to call the baby by his own middle name. I had no objections and didn't want to spoil his long-held dream so that was a decision made. It was even more precious as I'd had three scans while I was pregnant that all predicted a girl, so to have a son was a huge surprise!

When we had our second son he said I could choose. I liked the names of two of my former friends from school, he had no objections to them so that was decided.

I think that royalty are the only families where names, usually the middle ones, are chosen to honour (or appease) other family members.

Appeasing is an odd word here.

I'm in complete agreement with the other grans' comments and thank you MawB for the chuckle "... or if she is, what a charming name!"

my son told me and he’s conflicted between appeasing his wife and considering his sister’s feelings.

Is it actually your son who first thought this would be a problem, and you are following his lead?
Or would you have felt upset anyway?

Either way, he needs to discuss it calmly with his wife and come to a joint decision with her.

You and his sister need to accept whatever name they choose and be happy about it.

Am I hearing right is your family born in a different century
normskill ?
family values have got nothing to do with naming a baby it’s absolutely nothing to do with you and no pressure should be put on your daughter in law
Stop this nonsense immediately you should never have expected her to give the boy a name of your choosing either These expectations are so naughty keep out of their business
and be happy whatever shes named

Oi, MawB there's nothing wrong with Mabel and it's becoming very fashionable again!


I'm not to keen on Normski, sorry but I'm not. Is it short for Norman or Norma?

I'm sorry, but I'm not getting the gist of this
Why would giving a baby a certain name, break up your family?
Parents get to choose their children's name, it's their prerogative
Bet you chose your kid's names, did you not? It would be rather odd if you didn't
You get used to it, it eventually suits them
Don't sweat the small stuff
My daughter has taken up a cause and raised over £7,000 to help a little boy called Stan, whose only chance at life, is for his parents to raise £500,000 to get him to Singapore for treatment. He's only two and I don't know if against the rules, but come on lasses #save our stan
He hasn't much time left to fly over there, time is of thr essence

The naming is the right of the parents. The extended family delights in the precious new life and celebrates without bringing their emotional baggage along.

Your little granddaughter is going to be born soon, which is really exciting and you're dreading the name being announced. And it hurts. Really??!

Let your son and DiL enjoy choosing a name without feeling stressed by expectations. It's totally unfair. This is meant to be a happy time and you're spoiling it. Their choice of name is nothing to do with anyone else.

I think you're confusing family values with family 'traditions' and crossing the line as a grandparent/in-law. They are becoming a little family who will make their own traditions. Sit back and just enjoy your grandchild.