So very long story, it would take too long to go into
So I’ll try and condense it
Partner & I bought house together(me house him renting)
I sold mine and put my 80k straight down for deposit and so that I would have NO Mortgage, we got mortgage for 80k in both names
BUT he paid full mortgage himself.
On buying the house solicitor set up a deed of trust to protect my 80k which he said at the time
So I pay all the mortgage? Solicitor said if you want .....,, to pay half that means so will in the end owe 75% & you 25%
He didn’t want that, so signed the declaration.
So this as been a massive problem in the relationship as he thinks I’ve conned him!!
Also 4 yrs ago he had an affair of 2 yrs which I always thought something was not right but when brought up the usual thing
Your mad, what you talking about
Anyway all come to light with a bit of me looking about.
He said he wanted to give it a go again and Know it’s 4 yrs on
Don’t get me wrong we have our issues both of us
I suffer anxiety/depressio(this I think lead to affair, as I was really poorly)
He as ocd, timing of things
Getting up, breakfast dinner tea. Clothes washing twice a day(3 if us) hides his things that he bought and few other things
Anyway the other day he said as I was going back to shop for what he’d forgot
Are you happy
I said I think we better sit down, as HE obviously as something to say/tell me
Basically he said
He is struggling with the affair????
I asked what he meant
He said, he’s struggling that I
Well this led to me crying
Saying oh your not doing this to me again, fucking my head up.
He then went on to say
Oh the tears as He’s coming home(my adult son)
Not that I am emotionally upset
He also brought up the
Deed of trust, saying I conned
Can’t see the passed him paying xxx in interest on a mortgage and if anything happens!!!!!! I get my 80k back @ extra
Doesn’t realise he was paying that 17 yrs ago in rent
Where he would get nothing from it
He also got low LTV % because of my deposit and using my name on mortgage because 17yrs ago he wouldn’t have got 80k himself
He just can’t see it
So it went from bad to worse, both of us bringing old shit up
We’re weren’t talking for 2 days, Sunday but more
Today, less I’d say
Never mentioned like normally if he’s having a day to himself
On going out, said just going a toot about
So relationship is in tatters
and he takes himself out
We’re both in our 60’s
Me 62 he 65
Another thing that’s struck me is
He’s 2 mths from government pension, he already get private pension
Just seem coincidental was he bidding his time till now ?
He very good at sweeping things under the carpet
and good at putting face on and talking more to my son
My heads in bits again and I don’t know what to do or even say
Clio51 Mon 14-Sep-20 15:21:21
Oopsadaisy4 Mon 14-Sep-20 15:38:33
Clio51 Mon 14-Sep-20 16:01:09
Oopsadaisy4 Mon 14-Sep-20 16:16:01
ValerieF Mon 14-Sep-20 18:13:14