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husband secretly buying lottery tickets

(15 Posts)
omega1 Sat 17-Oct-20 09:54:43

When my hubby a former smoker gambler and recovering alcoholic was in hospital I decided to tidy his bedroom and found loads of lottery tickets for £24 and £25 down the side of his bed and under his pillow which he hadn't told me about. When confronted he said he had been trying to win some money to give to me. I feel so disappointed that he has been deceiving me likek this. Do you think it is a big deall or am I making too much of it. He is very good in every other way

wildswan16 Sat 17-Oct-20 10:15:37

Yes, it is a big deal. He kept it secret because he knew it would be a major concern for you. I think you really need to have a conversation with him about going back to AA or GA.

If he isn't keen, then contact them yourself for advice.

silverlining48 Sat 17-Oct-20 10:16:30

I would be upset and worried snout the deceit too so Understand why you are concerned about this especially because of your husband’s addictive history.
That’s quite a lot to be spending and he must know the punter never wins.
I hope you can both sort this out and wish you well,

sodapop Sat 17-Oct-20 12:36:22

I agree with Wildswan you need to speak to your husband about some help with his gambling addiction. It's the start of the slippery slope Omegal nip it in the bud if you can.
It must be very worrying for you, I wish you well.

Hithere Sat 17-Oct-20 12:54:00

Sounds like his gambling days are not over.

He needs to address his addictions and gain your trust back.

SpringyChicken Sat 17-Oct-20 13:33:26

Yes, you should be worried, he still has a 'habit' and was hiding it.

Grandmabatty Sat 17-Oct-20 15:01:30

Yes, I think you should be worried. What also stands out is his lack of responsibility for this. He wanted to have a win for you. This is pushing it onto you when it is his problem. The time has come for a hard discussion I fear. Good luck.

Kseniya Sat 17-Oct-20 15:03:41

practically everyone once tries to catch their luck and win, perhaps this is the only case. don't get nervous yet and watch. but i mean it is often addictive(

merlotgran Sat 17-Oct-20 15:07:20

I'm not sure what you mean by the amounts, omega1. Do you mean he spent £24 or £25 on each ticket or were they winning lines to that value?

Sorry if this a dumb question.

EllanVannin Sat 17-Oct-20 15:59:57

This is only ruinous to his wallet compared to the other addictions where the health is concerned.

BlueBelle Sat 17-Oct-20 16:08:28

Of course it’s a big deal
He is gambling he still has the fever A gambler who is even spending £1 will be only a step away from increasing the odds and the fact that he has been hiding it tells you that he knows he has taken a step backwards
It really doesn’t matter what the amounts are or what they mean the fact that he’s still buying tickets and hiding them means he knows he shouldn’t be doing it and is probably into other gambling too but of course he will deny it and have a valid reason for it, because he’s a gambler
He needs help

Tweedle24 Sat 17-Oct-20 16:09:04

I can understand your upset but, it is not his deceit, it is that of the addiction. He can’t help himself and, as others have said, GA is in order but, it will only work if it he really wants to break the habit.

I am afraid that you either have to give him as much support as you can or leave him to sort it out for himself one way or the other. You certainly need to tell him that you know he is still gambling and let him decide whether he is willing to work at breaking the habit

Awesomegranny Sat 17-Oct-20 16:13:25

The fact that he’s hiding the tickets, proves that there is a problem. He wanted to give you some money it would of been better to give you the money he was going to spend on the lottery tickets, £25 every so often soon mounts up.Maybe tell him every time he’s tempted to buy tickets he gives the money to you instead and maybe you could open a savings account to save for a holiday or treat of some kind.

Aneweye Sat 17-Oct-20 21:34:56

Don’t be worried, be realistic, he needs help, he knows it, he’s been here before. He knew it long before you did. Do you want to help him or give up on him? Presumably it’s the former as you’re here being brave enough to open up.
Do we know you’ve proved strong and able enough to deal with this. If someone’s gonna have a relapse, then at least this time it’s likely been triggered by this abnormal world we are all now in. Yes he needs help, if you want to be be the first rung of that ladder, then give him a chance to relax. Explain you know where you both are, and as of now you’re both going to beat it once and for all.

TrendyNannie6 Tue 20-Oct-20 20:43:46

Yes he was hiding a gambling habit