My sister is 5 years older than me, and has always been demanding and bossy. My dad died when I was 8, leaving my mum with three girls to bring up, which she did brilliantly, holding us all together like a matriachal elephant.
My sister has had many illnesses throughout her life, so always needed the attention, quite rightly. However this turned into using her health as an excuse to dodge things later in life as my mother needed assistance. I took responsibility for power of attorney through to care homes, and finally funeral. Although I didn't mind doing any of this, the unpleasantness and griping has poured out of my sister for years. The funeral and wake saw some very nasty verbal assaults which really was the final straw for me.
This was 4 years ago, and I have only seen her once, before lockdown.
I was dreading having to face the expected contact when I retired but of course lockdown saved me. I have spoken to her on the phone to check she is ok, and text from time to time, but always me that instigates the contact.
I would appreciate any views from outside looking in please, as I know she is going to expect me to visit eventually. My family all say let her drop, but I have a sense of duty and obligation pulling me.
She has many friends and a son, although she never really comes out of the village.
Do I just suggest neutral ground for lunch with my eldest sister joining us?
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