Meeting other like minded people

I've lost touch with all my friends over the last twenty years. They all moved to various parts of the country before the days of emails. We kept in touch by phone for a while (expensive before the days of mobiles) and cards for a longer while but that eventually tailed off. I would love to be in a friendship group, if I knew how to find one! for emailing and, post pandemic restrictions, meeting up.

I have found a couple of friends through YOURS magazine where you can ask for friends locally or further afield. One lady I wrote to has become a firm pal as has her husband and mine, we meet up for lunch and have shared cruise holidays to. You have to make a first step though..

Saying “I went out looking for friends and none could be found, I went out to be a friend and friends where every where”

Good luck

It is hard making new friends.
If you have a common interest it helps. It’s easier to chat about something which isn’t personal.I’ve met lots of folk now having a dog.
Also the U3A when we can meet up is brilliant as there are various interest groups.
Developing a friendship takes time but having a shared interest can give you an excuse to go somewhere for an hour or two if there’s a show on or a walk you’d like to do.
Good luck.

Hi Molly
We are much in the same boat as you,
Would love to make friends with you.
All the people on here are friendly .

Junie

Jeannie59

I joined Gransnet to chat to others and My posts never get posted or replied to
So I am wondering if this site is as clichey, as the outside world

I dont know what you mean by "not posted". There's no pre approval of posts here sonas soon as you hit the "post" bitton tjeu should be there.

Unfortunately there's no facility to reply to a specific poster unless someone decides to quote them (as I have done) or tag them in so replies will jist be among the general chat

Jeannie59 I’m wondering if your posts/questions appear to be unnoticed could be because you are inadvertently posting in the wrong place.

I was touched by your post yesterday about your husband’s recent diagnosis. Unfortunately you had inadvertently posted it on a thread discussing ceramic tiles. I replied to you and suggested if you started it as a new thread you would receive helpful advice from other posters in the same position as yourself.

Another poster, I think CrazyH, came along shortly afterwards and posted similar to you. Sorry you are having a tough time. Please do try again with it as a new thread and I’m sure you will have a helpful response ?

Hi Jeanie, I'll reply to you. I posted on here about meeting up with people and received Rude replies about being in lockdown and there's always one! It was obvious I asking about meeting when able. Can't win them all.

Jeannie59 I dont respond very often as its too much hassle I can't even work out how to respond to anyone.

Agree with everyone who has suggested joining something to do something that interests you . Then you make friends through the shared interest and the pressure to make friends is off. Have moved a lot - reading groups have been great. Join one or start one. Good luck

I'm friends with a local childless couple. We met through walking the dogs and we do have a lot in common.

I think they feel a little sorry for me as I'm on my own (although I'm perfectly happy). I think it's sad that they only have each other, and no surviving family. I do try not to harp on about the kids and grandkids when we talk!

I joined U3A with the hope of finding new friends but immediately lock down started and none of the activities have started up again. I would love to make new friends in my area (near Ely).

Not sure what happened there, curse you predictive text. That should read, whereabouts in Lincolnshire

Hi Molly

Where about sun Lincolnshire are you. When we were able to a few of us from Lincolnshire have met up and I hope that we will be able to do so again. So hopefully you will be able to join a meet up?

Bbbface

Please ignore if sensitive but did you choose not to have children? If so, do you now regret?

OP clearly states that she could not have children!

I'm in the same boat, although I'm in my own. I have friends, but they are all in couples and have grandchildren. They are busy with their families and I go weeks without hearing from them. I send messages, etc trying to keep contact and hope I'm not being a nuisance. I've looked at groups before, there were very few and things I'm not interested in. I meet others when I'm out with the dog, I've met another divorced lady like myself and we have said when we are allowed to we will go for coffee. Love Gransnet, you feel like you belong somewhere and I do enjoy the chats.

4allweknow I cannot understand how that happened because I am aware that some other GNs are/were in a similar position. That is disgraceful if that happened.

Jeannie59 may I suggest you read the Good Morning thread and also soop's kitchen. You will be welcomed on both threads.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ReadyMeals, I like being anonymous on here - so have no wish to transfer to 'real life' meetings at all. I really do value all the different views and life experiences I read about here, though.

Hello Jeannie59. I have bern on GNet for quite a number of years now and I too find it strange that no posting I have submitted has been highlighted. Dd died coming up for 2 years ago and even posted on the bereavement site asking for help on an issue. Not one acknowledgement or response.

The vast majority of my posts don't get replies but that's mainly cos threads are just people posting experiences of a particular topic like "who has ever seen a ghost" etc. Not really much to reply about someone's account of an experience. As for making friends on here, most of the people seem very pleasant and fun, but as this is one of the few sites I don't identify myself on (due to some of the very personal family topics) I don't really see how a friendship on here could move into real life territory.

readalot and Jeannie59

I am sorry to hear that you feel ignored. Your comments should be visible if you have posted - you can check immediately after posting that it is on the thread.

I simply comment when I feel I can make a contribution, but don't necessarily expect a direct response. If you start a thread you should get replies, however I noticed there are unanswered posts... just one of those things I am afraid.

I guess we all click on threads which sound of interest to us personally, and ignore other threads. In defence of those who don't read all replies, I don't always have the time or patience to read through 5+ pages of discussion... sorry.

Jeannie59, when I was first on here my posts seemed to be unreplied to and made me waddle off sadly like Billy Nae Mates ! But it balances out , lots of replies and super wise advice usually . Molly , I don't know how to make friends either so am reading with interest - good morning to all !

I forget offering to help with teas at local sports clubs or flowers at church.
Some public spaces (inc cemeteries) need the help of amateur gardeners

From the experience of several of us (some work in lockdown, some dont)
Find somewhere to learn a new skill - not necessarily a craft
Get a dog and walk it at roughly the same time each day
Start a neighbours' group - WhatsApp or find a reason to contact a lot of neighbours eg I'm new to area, and I need a reliable plumber
Volunteer
Start a book group or a lunch group
Get to know local independent shop-keepers, they have a wealth of knowledge of local needs eg bonus granny previously mentioned
Offer to listen to children read in local primary (I think you'll need a DBS)
Good luck

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