Care home for husband ?

You could try cutting back on the other demands on you. You have a ‘ very lively dog to walk and control’. Maybe you need a trainer to help you control it? Perhaps you could have a dog walker some days? Maybe you don’t need to help daughter and gc quite so much.

I don't know how this will help the OP - she's understandably resentful of the caring that she already does and her husband will then expect 24 hour attention, which would be intolerable.

I would suggest you get a benefits check if you haven't already. And ask your gp for a referral to social services.

Notjustaprettyface if he wants you to be his carer I can’t see him agreeing to go into a care home which he would have to do so you need to consider all the options. Have you spoken to your doctor about the situation? Has there been a proper assessment of your husband’s needs and future prognosis?

You could try cutting back on the other demands on you. You have a ‘ very lively dog to walk and control’. Maybe you need a trainer to help you control it? Perhaps you could have a dog walker some days? Maybe you don’t need to help daughter and gc quite so much.

Be clear what you want and how much you are prepared to do and make sure you have an input into any assessments of your husband’s care.

You could speak to your local Carer’s Association as well.

You don’t like him very much now do you ? but unfortunately it’s kinda for better or worse isn’t it ? unless you divorce him or just leave him and let him find his own way of getting care
He sounds like an old pair of shoes that you don’t really want and asking if they should go to a charity shop or the bin Maybe it’s the way you worded it
As you are only 63 bi can understand you are resentful of looking after someone old enough to be your father ( and who you don’t really live) but that’s the life you chose.… poor man maybe any of us would be grumpy after breaking a hip losing mobility and having a wife who is resentful
I think you should find some nice carers ( they can’t all be useless my Dad had lovely carers) and do your own thing You don’t love this old boy and it’s hard to be in a relationship where your care is needed if you don’t really like someone
Make some decisions but you can’t bung him in a home because he doesn’t fit in your life any more

This is a warning to those in an unhappy relationship. Get out now.

It is hard living with resentment , please look at what you have written here !
He isn’t a parcel to put on a shelf out of the way , talk to him , see if you can find out why he is so grumpy,
look to see if some of his friends or relations could visit and take him out for an afternoon to give you both a rest
Get some help with a cleaner to give you a few hours of freedom

You can't just put someone in a home if they don't want to go unless they lack capacity.

That is hard. As Sodapop says maybe try some respite care.

We have tried carers but they were useless and he didn’t like them around
He wants me to be his carer !

That seems a better option dragonfly but I'm not sure how much care the OP's husband actually needs. Sounds like you are unhappy notjustaprettyface and this is what you need to address. Would your husband agree to some respite care to give you a chance to recharge your batteries and both of you think about what is best for the future.

A care home seems a bit extreme unless he is happy to go. Could you get carers in to help him morning and night.