Where do I start?

My best friend in the world is gay

How does he feel about younger women, I will swap him for my H in a heartbeat

Thank you all for your advice and wisdom! Online sites can be both nightmares and dreams this forum is a dream for me!
Thank you all again, cheers!!!!

Kandinsky

I’d carry in seeing him as a friend if you really like his company, but be honest with him and say he’s not really your type ( intimately). Online dating is known for bluntness so he won’t be that bothered.
Also, I agree with a pp about straight men using online apps. They usually want much younger women as they’re looking for sexual relationships - so the fact that he’s gone for an older woman is a bit unusual - are you rich?
Seriously, just enjoy his company for what it is & carry on looking for George Clooney.

Ha ha, not rich or looking for George Clooney although I would not turn him down! I will enjoy his company and see what happens but I am going to just say.."platonic would be awesome if he would be willing to hang out with me"

Why should an interest in gossip, fashion, cooking, baking and home décor indicate a man is gay? I mean, I am a woman who likes cars, football and airfix kits, and I can assure you, my sexual preferences are wholly heterosexual. I think the OP may be confusing very outdated gender stereotypes with sexuality.

It’s more likely that the OP is looking for a chap who has the characteristics she associates with maleness, hence lack of attraction.

Gay men make excellent friends. He’s a keeper - as a friend.

I’d carry in seeing him as a friend if you really like his company, but be honest with him and say he’s not really your type ( intimately). Online dating is known for bluntness so he won’t be that bothered.
Also, I agree with a pp about straight men using online apps. They usually want much younger women as they’re looking for sexual relationships - so the fact that he’s gone for an older woman is a bit unusual - are you rich?
Seriously, just enjoy his company for what it is & carry on looking for George Clooney.

You’ve had one date ? Hardly cause to get so worked up about it.
Find something else to do, date other people, or don’t.

I’m feeling very old, I didn’t know what pansexual was, never heard of it, so looked it up, it means attracted to all different genders, so non the wiser, but if you want a man and he doesn’t want a woman I can’t see the point in seeing him. That’s very simplistic I know, I would only want a man if he just wanted me, couldn’t cope with anything more complicated than that. I wonder what dating site you are on it seems strange to me, perhaps you have your wires crossed, but good luck.

So he’s great company but there’s no chemistry. He’s a keeper… as a friend. Many people would love a friend like this. He could be just sensitive and shy.

Why on earth would a gay man go on a dating site looking for a woman it would be his worse nightmare I would think
I think your gaydar is out of kilter

Some men do have feminine likes, just like some girls are tomboys and interested in mending cars and weight lifting or boxing but are still feminine sexually

If you’re so sure, or that worried…..talk about it with him

Better than dating a serial killer

You are clearly not a good match.

Why dont you tell him it is not working out for you?

He follows gossip, fashion, cooking, baking, home décor you name it.

So did my dad!
?

Whether he's gay or not, there is no chemistry here. Would he make a good friend? Maybe then let him know you'd like to be friends and not worry about what his orientation may or may not be.

He was on a dating app looking for a woman and I would assume he knows what he wants better than you.

Why wouldn’t a man be interested in the subjects you list?

If you have made sexy flirty comments and he hasn’t responded maybe he is seeing you as a friend.

Carry on dating! Tell him you like him but not romantically. (that's OK isn't it?)
If the chemistry isn't there now it never will be.

Kandinsky Sun 18-Jul-21 21:06:50
Why do you think he’s gay?
Is it because he packed a perfect picnic?

He is probably more feminine than me and I am pretty feminine. He follows gossip, fashion, cooking, baking, home décor you name it. And when I have said sexually flirty comments it's like I get a best friends response not a hetero man's response. Basically it hits a brick wall ):

Why do you think he’s gay?
Is it because he packed a perfect picnic?

well what did he say he was looking for in his profile.
maybe he is pansexual.
why don't you ask him something like, ideally how would he see himself situated in say a year's time.
has he not mentioned anything about his previous relationships.
just another thought; are you sure he is sincere. you may be picking up something out of kilter. has he discussed or asked about money, or career.
are you sure this is not a financially predatory situation; it is so common, esp towards women over 50.
most men seem to pitch themselves at women 20 years younger for romantic purposes, seeing themselves as irresistible ! just beware.

Ask him.

At least then you will know, the problem is if he says No, will you believe him? and will the Chemistry still be at 0?

Does he just want you as a friend? I think that you have to have ‘the talk’.