I have left

Your new home looks great! Enjoy your new life!

I am so happy for you Deedee. Well done xx

Your new home looks lovely DeeDee your own private and peaceful haven. Enjoy it.

deedee I hope you can now relax and enjoy life without the worry of having accusations and blame thrown at you constantly.

I expect it will be scary and difficult at first but I feel sure that in the long run you will feel much happier. Good luck.

A lovely home for you DeeDee, it looks great.

Your house looks lovely DeeDee many happy times ahead for you.

Well done you... and baby steps in to your new chapter. Healthy boundaries and self worth are paramount. Can I recommend two books if your a reader .

The monk who sold his Ferrari and the power of now

All the best and I hope something lovely happens for you.

Just a piece of advice. Keep a diary. Keep dates of everything that is said and done especially with regards to the house sale. We have been involved in a couple of disputes re cars, house renovations etc and have always regretted not being absolutely sure of dates. It really helps in any disputes.

Well done Deedee! You have done so well & are an inspiration for all those Grans who are scared to take the plunge & get out of bad marriages/partnerships. I’m really pleased for you & your little home looks fabulous.

Deedee your home is beautiful and it was so heartwarming to hear your update. This is YOUR time now. Enjoy your wonderful bungalow and please do keep in touch - I've loved reading this thread and it always cheers me up

What a lovely home Deedee, it must be like a dream come true. I'm sure your story will help others. Very happy for you.

Lovely photos, it's all really pretty.
You sound so happy ?

Brilliant update! Wish I could pop round for some cake.?
The only way is up now.

Well done Deedee! You should be really proud of yourself

You have a beautiful home, Deedee! It looks so welcoming and cosy.

Well done, you should be proud of yourself. Maybe when you’re more settled you should consider sharing your exerpeince with others going through the same thing, Women’s Aid or something like that. You have such a positive story to tell.

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Good morning all....I'm settling in nicely now. I have started baking again and my sisters, brother, dad, best friend and whoever else fancies dropping in ? come to mine on a Friday for a cuppa and cake and I love it!!! They've requested carrot cake this week ?.
On a practical note I contacted my council about single person 25% discount on council tax and he asked if I'd also applied for Council Tax Reduction (I hadn't because I thought they were the same thing). I applied online and had to send proof of id, national insurance number and benefits summary and all I have to pay is £11 a month. Brill. So if you are on a low income it's definitely worth a try even if you only get a small reduction it all counts. My housing benefit was also sorted and all my rent is being paid apart from £5 per week which I have to pay so another plus. I did find that speaking to the relevant authorities on the phone initially rather than email was really helpful in pointing me in the right direction to what support you can get. Don't struggle pick up the phone and ask. Be brutally honest about your situation.
If anyone is in the same situation I was in and think that they can't afford to leave so have no other option but to stay in a toxic relationship there is help out there if you ask for it. No it's not easy to begin with. Yes you will go through a thousand different emotions. Yes you have a lot of processes, paperwork, phonecalls to deal with but it is so worth all the effort to have peace in your own home where you make all the decisions. You decide who you see, where you go and there is noone waiting to interrogate you about where you went, who you spoke to, when you get back!! You can do it. Speak to friends and family and get their help and support with somewhere safe to stay (I stayed at my daughters but I also pinched my sisters houses when they went on holiday). Don't let anyone tell you you can't do it because you really are stronger than you think ❤

So pleased to read your update. Enjoy your holiday and hope you settle into your new life soon.

Deedee you have done brilliantly, I am so happy for you. Everyone reading your posts is behind you, and you are an inspiration. ?

It sounds lovely deedee. Enjoy your holiday with your sister

You have done amazingly well deedee relax now and enjoy time in your new home and with all your friends and family who clearly care about you a great deal.

Such wonderful news DeeDee, love that your family and friends have all helped you. Well done, I do admire you. Enjoy your fun family weekend away. So happy for you.

Wel I'm in...It's been a very busy and emotional week. I'm not going to pretent that being on your own after 40yrs of being married and raising children is easy because it's really not. I have had wobbles a few times because it would be so much easier to have stayed and I suppose you have to grieve to move on. Yesterday was a really bad day for me but I shook it off and today has been better. I have pottered around the garden and tidied it up a bit. My new home looks lovely. I have had some lovely furniture donated by friends and family. My children bought me a sofa and my friend gave me her washer/dryer because she has replaced it for a bigger one. My daughter fetched my memory cabinet (things from my children/grandchildren over the years). I got my cooker,bed and freezer from Very on buy now pay in 12 months. I got a gorgeous wardrobe and drawers from a local hospice charity and my son made me a desk from a cut off piece of oak worktop and I got some lovely stools from british heart foundation. The only big cost was the carpets and my dad paid half towards them bless him.
I'll just take things one day at a time and I know there will be good and bad days but eventually more good than bad I hope.
My sister has booked a caravan in Cleethorpes this weekend for my Dads birthday and I am going too and I can't bloomin wait!!! So ready for a break and i know it will be full of laughter and probably a few tears or maybe both ?

I missed your update I hope the carpets are in soon xx

A failure?? You must be joking…you are obviously very, very strong, both to put up with it for so long and then to walk away and start to build a new life. Good luck to you and stay as strong as you obviously are (however it feels).

You've done so well DeeDee. If you ever get wobbles, look back at this thread to see how far you've come and how we all were with you every step of the way. Best of luck for the future.