New thread (ex thread, retirement problems)

So sorry it has come to this for you Clio. A better life on the other side of this does await though.

Did you keep any documentation about the amount you put into the house?

I would get myself off to a solicitor quickly. Hopefully he'll keep burying his head in the sand while you get a swift start.

Yes Clio, get all your documentation in order and see a solicitor. Do you have joint bank accounts, can you rent a place while getting a solicitor to sort things out. Also talk to your adult son, you never know he might have some ideas. Whatever happens you are taking a very brave step, well over due. And hopefully you will find a better life.

I am scared as I suffer anxiety, I think adrenaline is keeping me going at the moment till it hits me

but i know it will never change
He’s exactly like his dad was, and his mum left him. Know I understand why.
20 yrs off living together and I feel as if I just handed him a pot off money that he would off invested in renting a house instead off buying with me.

All the documents are in order, I have a deed of trust and we are tenants in common. Albeit the deed being written wrong at the time, I could if things got nasty(and he knows this) get my written amount and half the house, but I don’t know if I could do this as he as been paying his 50% half in mortgage .

The money I’ve got saved would easily get swollowed up in renting somewhere, they’ve sky rocketed over £1000 mth. Airbnb is just as expensive if not more as you pay by the night.
I’m hoping sister can get into Australia , her kids live there before Xmas so I can stay at her house for a few weeks.

He’s gone and bought our usual tea for Tuesday lamb chops
I know it sounds petty but I don’t wanna do HIS tea with mine & ds, but he said it’s silly putting 2 lots of gas on at different times and it is really. I’m still reluctant thou.
Even sleeping in the same bed, there’s NO chance he will go in spare room. It’s single bed not comfy, no carpet his f.... indoor exercise bike! So it means I go, while he sleeps in king size, lovely decoratored(I paid for) but I don’t wanna share bed as that’s playing his game off burying my head in the sand

How the hell do I live in the same house, not cook,sleep in bed with him and pretend, when I’m reeling he puts my life up in the air for his f.... bike (I need a secure place for my bike) his words. Nothing about ME

It's unfortunate but if he won't move, you'll have to. It's not silly to buy and cook your own food either. You are going to need steel nerves I fear. Like others, my suggestion is contact a lawyer as soon as possible. I hope you find happiness. Good luck.

He’s off his head, he just came down and sat in the lounge whilst I was preparing tea thinking I’d be doing his.
I’m going to have to get a new menu together so we don’t have usual on certain days.

I’ve already been to a solicitor yrs ago so know exactly where I stand regarding things.
Never thought at 64 I’d be in this position!! Should off stayed in my own house and just dated.

It’s going to be a hard bumpy road.

Why not, without telling him, buy 2 single beds and put the double in the other room. Doesn’t matter where it goes in the room just plonk it in.

Yes it will be a hard bumpy road but that will pass... you are 64... so the alternative is another 20 years of...this??
You know what you need to do.. you are strong enough to do it... and to be blunt.. your adult son is exactly that.. an adult.. so speak to him as one.. I am pretty sure he is aware of the atmosphere.
And a trip to another solicitor would bring you up to date with you rights too.