Manfriend

"I made a decision based on your answers"

It doesn't matter what it may be considered normal or not nowadays

This is about the standards you are willing to put up with

He isn't a good friend, no way he would make a good partner.

Please discontinue this relationship and find people who value you. Make one of the people who values you yourself

He is boring and depressing ME already.....
You can't really want this in your life surely..?

Well, I have not met him since my 20s. It's all phone calls from him. I decided to block as I was feeling uneasy. Although he was a family friend back then. I am not easily swayed. Been alone and happy for decades.. someone mutual gave him my number. Changing it tomoz. I find it sad how he turned out. I was being supportive due to his ill health. Havent dated him or anyone else for long time so was unsure if his comments re, girlfriends was the norm now. Clearly not, thank you for your comments. I made a decision based on your answers.

Think of the film 'Dirty Dancing' and don't let anyone put you in a corner.

LTB

User7777, if you start anything with this man you may well find you become Used7777!

If he wants to talk, meet him in a cafe & cut off any mention of his exploits with girlfriends. Tell him you want a platonic friendship. Can’t he talk about anything else? Books, films, paintings, gardening, politics - the list is endless! Go for walks?

I’m amazed you’re still seeing this person. Even if he had any good points what you’ve said would outweigh all of them. For heaven’s sake, of course he wants a relationship - and an emotional crutch. Do yourself a favour and block his number.

Does he drink, by the way?
All this weepy at night nonsense; sounds as if he's tanked up and self pitying.
Bloody man!

He sounds horribly manipulative.
Please don't allow him to draw you into his mind games.
You're worth better.

I think I you already know the solution to your dilemma very clearly.

User7777

The question is - why do you entertain such a trainwreck?

He is a series of red flags, yet he is not the issue here - you are.

Aren't your instincts screaming run?

Please do not entertain any kind of relationship till your instincts are back to protect you.

Then do yourself a favour USER777 and get out of the corner! Stop offering him support and find someone who likes you for who you are and wants to spend time with you. You deserve better than this.

Do not entertain such a relationship , it will be just another notch he has on his bedpost , keep him at arms length or the outside of the door ! You are worth more !

I have not said I want a relationship with him. In our 20s we all loved him as a person. Meaning my entire family. I feel very slow to reciprocate but he is very keen for a full on relationship whereas my initial intention was to be supportive. But he is very weepy, especially at night. On the phone of course. I have had a blow by blow account of previous girlfriends antics in his bedroom. Very off putting , even asking what I would do in bedroom. I feel cornered

Unless, there are some hidden characteristics or elements that you haven't mentioned, then the man seems to be just a jerk.

So, why on earth would you want a relationship with him?

As you have only listed the negatives it sounds as though you don't even like him so why is he still a friend?

You don’t seem to like him very much after 3 months of friendship so my thoughts are that you should call it a day and stop seeing him.

No! Nothing about him sounds good.

Do you REALLY need advice sounds fairly obvious

I thought that as well Doodledog not a single positive comment from User777
Says it all really.

It's interesting that when you describe him these are the things you think to tell us.

Is there anything positive that you have to say about him? If so, do the positives outweigh the negatives?

Lose his number today.

If this is his best behaviour as he wants a relationship with you, what can be his worst?

May I ask why you are consulting with us?Don't you feel you are worth more than this?

What could possibly go wrong ? mmm, let me think.

He will never change his ways from those which benefit him. Listen to what he is telling you and this is before a relationship is established!

Surely you deserve better than such a self centred man to share your life with. ? ??