Date gone bad

He could be embarrased too
I agree telling him hi and suggesting coffee again would diffuse the situation

Quite a lot of men of a certain age cannot discuss intimate problems with out getting embarressed,they are not as open to discussion like the younger generation.
He is probably embarressed by his lack of knowledge if he has not been in a relationship for a long while.
Meet up with him and have a coffee & chat and try and take things from there.

Do you know whether he has an active sex life? Maybe he's out of practice too, and was as desperate as you for it to work. It's all very well saying that a mature man should be able to discuss things with you but there are many, many men and women who wouldn't be able to have that sort of discussion on a first encounter. It's a whole other kettle of fish having that discussion with someone you've been with for a long time. Possibly he blames himself and, as others have said, he's embarrassed. No reason for you to feel humiliated though. If you bump into him you could smile brightly and just say 'I'm so pleased to see you. I miss our chats over coffee' then just leave it at that. He may just be a creep interested in nothing but sex. On the other hand he may just be a human being with some flaws, like most of us.

I am indebted to you all for the time and thought you have taken to give me such good advice.
It’s good to have such support and I am truly grateful.
I intend to embrace the Japanese ethos of Wabi Sabi, the art of appreciating beauty that is imperfect. It will help to repair my dented self esteem.
I shall also congratulate myself on a lucky escape!
Thank you.

Shinamae me too….. cobwebs

Drawinggran I feel for you so much. It definitely wasn't your fault, it's just how our female bodies change as we get older. Lots of good advice above to which I won't add; I just wanted to
send empathy and support.

Please don’t let this one incident dent your self esteem. Breathe deeply, put it down to one of life’s ups and downs and carry on with your good life.
I agree with ExDancer, carry on your routines and who knows what will transpire in the future.
Look at yourself in the mirror and say I’m a strong independent woman and I will get through this. Treat yourself to something nice to lift your spirits.
All the luck in the world going forward.

He’s probably more embarrassed than you are.
And you did nothing wrong by the way, You wanted to have sex so you did. It just didn’t quite go to plan, but how was you to know?

Give it time & hopefully you can be friends again.

I haven’t had sex for nearly thirty years……must be like Fort Knox down there.Having said that l never have enjoyed sex so celibacy suits me just fine. ?
I agree with other posters and think he is embarrassed and humiliated…

I second Aveline.

A lot of women find sex painful after a longish pause or post-menopause.

Telling yourself to relax and enjoy it doesn't often help and never will unless the man has sufficient maturity and understanding to try to help.

Give yourself time to recover from this disappointment, and if or when you feel like trying again, remember that you are a strong independant woman and that unfortunately that frightens a great many men.

Look for one who likes strong independant women and be honest with him about your temporary difficulties re sex.

It should be possible to solve these if you both want to.

I think the poor man is blaming himself when if fact it was your body letting you down. He's probably highly embarrassed and doesn't know what to do, so he's avoiding you.
I wouldn't push it for a month or so, don't purposely go looking for him, but at the same time stick to your routines with your walks and coffee breaks. Hopefully, with time, he'll pluck up courage to come looking for you to start again.
I admire your pluck, no experience is ever wasted. Good luck.

You know this man better than any of us.. could his reaction be down to embarrassment?
In any case, the problem is one of mechanics... dryness or whatever... please address that problem via your gp... then trust your instincts, you have done nothing wrong, he might not be the one for you, but that doesnt mean you wont meet someone else in the future... and next time you will be prepared.
Have courage, be proud of yourself... head up!!

Don't feel humiliated. This man is an idiot. He should have been able to talk with you about your problem and reassure you. If sex mattered to the extent that he ended the friendship so abruptly and rudely, he's not worth worrying about. It's just sad that you invested so much time. But don't let it put you off having another relationship, if you want to.

Maybe he’s embarrassed that it didn’t work out, too? I do understand how you feel. It was a long time ago now but after my marriage ended I met someone else and was devastated when that relationship didn’t work out as I put so much effort into it. We are still friends, though although we did have a period of time when we didn’t communicate. Then one day I phoned him for a chat and we resumed our friendship but just platonically as we were both with other people by then.Maybe, after a while your friend will become your friend again. I do hope so.

Thank you for your support and encouragement, it means a lot right now.

What a shame. It was brave of you to try again and you must feel so let down. However, if sex is all that matters to him and all the friendly companionship hasn't made him feel that you are worth persevering with and gently helping then it's his loss.
Silly man. Try to put this behind you although I know that's difficult. At least you tried. Now give yourself a pat on the back and think up a nice treat for yourself.