Gransnet forums

Relationships

Page 2 of 2 | First | Previous | Next | Last
| Flip | Customise |

Freeloading nephew

(31 Posts)
Add comment | Report
BlueBelle Sun 04-Sept-22 06:09:27

People behave as they have always behaved unless they are told or asked to act differently

You have laid down the boundaries over the years by never asking for any contribution from him now you expect him to be a mind reader

So instead of holding resentment you need to be clear
“John we love to see you and Mary at christmas but this year we are all chipping in £20 each (or whatever amount you feel right) towards the food

Add comment | Report
nanna8 Sun 04-Sept-22 04:57:14

Just tell him. Otherwise resentment will build and you might say something you regret later. Perhaps he has never even thought about it, some people are like that.

Add comment | Report
Summerlove Sun 04-Sept-22 03:09:41

I’m very confused on why you paid for him on holiday after he pushed his way in

Add comment | Report
Summerlove Sun 04-Sept-22 03:08:44

Stop inviting him

Add comment | Report
Spice101 Sun 04-Sept-22 02:48:38

Why not just say "we are all chipping in for this, your share will be x"

Add comment | Report
Greyleader Sun 04-Sept-22 00:52:08

Have a 46 year old nephew who visits at Christmas. We have always welcomed him even though housing is tight. At retirement we moved into a 3 bead room townhome and with our children, this makes 12 people. Since our retirement, our children take turns paying for dinner at least once per 7 day visit. Our nephew has never offered.

Recently, we paid for a bucket list vacation for our children. One child mentioned our trip to nephew who managed to be in the same area at the same time and included himself for each meal without any reciprocation. This increased our expenses quite a bit more than what we planned on.

How do we handle this? He and his wife have good jobs and would seem to have the means to contribute.

Page 2 of 2 | First | Previous | Next | Last
| Flip | Customise |