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Advice needed please..Difficult daughter at Christmas

(34 Posts)
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Redhead56 Thu 22-Dec-22 16:07:18

She sounds like an attention seeking child maybe don't invite her. She might then realise how tiresome her behaviour is to the family.

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Casdon Thu 22-Dec-22 16:06:30

If she was my daughter I wouldn’t ban her, but neither would I speak to her about it, and I’d advise your son not to either. She’s looking for attention I think, and the less attention you pay the quicker she’ll get the message. I wouldn’t ask her if she’s going to your son or your other daughter for Christmas either, I’d leave her to stew. As your granddaughter is 15 she’s old enough to have an explanation, she’ll understand I’m sure.

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Madgran77 Thu 22-Dec-22 16:04:51

Either just assume she is coming and then ALL of you completely ignore her behaviour and flatly refuse to be drawn into an argument OR her brother tells her she is not invited because her behaviour ruins it for everyone and he will not have that happen in his house!! . As soon as an argument potential is brewing everyone involved says they will not discuss it further and chat to each other. I actually think she is acting like a child and needs to be treated rather like one ...ignore bad behaviour, be positive when behaviour is appropriate!!

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Poppyred Thu 22-Dec-22 15:59:48

I would tell her to rein her neck in and behave herself or spend Christmas by herself. Very childish behaviour for a 40 year old!

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eazybee Thu 22-Dec-22 15:47:43

Ban her.
This is ridiculous behaviour from a woman in her forties, refusing to sit down and eat, deliberately spoiling a family gathering and upsetting younger members of her family. You have tolerated it far too long.

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Grandmabatty Thu 22-Dec-22 15:10:29

Why are you going to talk to her? It's an issue for her brother to deal with I would have thought. Keep out of sibling rivalry but speak to her if she's rude to you.

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Sago Thu 22-Dec-22 15:06:55

Hull???? Gremlins at work!

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Sago Thu 22-Dec-22 15:06:15

Just tell her you love her but not her behaviour.
Ask her to end it so the family can be strong again. Hull

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nannycake Thu 22-Dec-22 14:18:16

I know this must happen to a lot of families at this time of year
but I’m so tired of the trouble she causes. I have three children in their 40s two are married with families and my troubled daughter is single and would like to have the same. She’s got a career and a good life. Every Christmas she picks arguments with me or her brother then stops talking to one of us….this year it’s her brother. She comes to the meals but often stands up and won’t eat and is sulky. This year her brother is bearing the brunt and his daughter, she’s 15 has expressed her unhappiness that my daughter might not come to her house at Christmas but will go to her sisters. Sorry this is potted version. I might add that my children and grandchildren do all usually get on. I’m a single mum and the children were really close growing up. If I try to talk to my daughter about this (which I’m going to) she gets really angry, swears and spits feathers blaming everyone else so she won’t take any responsibility for her behaviour. At the moment we think she won’t come to my sons but is refusing to commit. If anyone has any advice I’d love to hear it otherwise I’m greatfull for a listening ear.

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