Desperate for advice please ..

He's making you feel very uncomfortable, yet you seem to be making him very comfortable - making him meals, not allowing him to help with the washing up. Why? I'd be seething at the gills. Next time he calls, unexpectedly, answer the door with your coat on and say that you are going out and it is an inconvenient time. That's just for starters. I like ExDancers reply saying to him "I value my independence too much" to get involved further. Marrying him? No........hang on a mo. Get a divorce.........I think you know deep down you already know what you have to do.

Up front and honest works every time. Well done Deede. It was only a 6 week relationship so no real harm done. I'm sure he'll be moving on to the next one. You'll know the signs next time.

Isn't it funny when anonymous people try to tell other anonymous people what they can and can't do on an anonymous forum where we can all have the freedom of speech to do and say whatever we want as long as it's not unkind or breaking any rules.

It amuses me. I don't ever let anyone shut me down if I want to speak. They can hide the thread if they want to.

YUP RUN a Mile :-)

Well done Deede for having an honest conversation.

I'm not a fan of ghosting or head games, so respect for doing this head on

Thanks Aldom

Callistemon21

*IT'S SORTED* 🙂

This is not shouting. Just in bold in order to make the post noticeable.
It's accompanied by a smile, indicating good humour.

Callistemon21 - To quote Violetsky who succinctly put - OK, I don't agree with you though -

The subtle difference between shouting and using a loud hailer are lost when writing in capitals. It is common knowledge that writing in caps is akin to shouting.

I am not getting drawn in any further, othewise poor Deede's thread will be in danger of being deleted.

Hopefully Deede you have a good night's sleep tonight and an even better day tomorrow

Not shouting at them, Jaylou

I put it in CAPITALS AND BOLD to alert posters to the fact that the problem has been solved.

There is a difference between shouting at people and using a loud hailer so that they can hear.

WELL DONE DEEDE! 👏👏👏

OK, I don't agree with you though so... there's that

violetsky I don’t need your advice to press buttons thanks
I just want people to read what Deedee has subsequently written and congratulate her instead of plowing on with their own agenda That’s the rude part

Callistemon21

It's just that posters might be wasting their breath time when DeeDe might have left the thread, or might feel obliged to keep answering kind posters.
We're only trying to help, no need to be rude.

If you know it is finished, there is no reason to continue reading the thread surely?
It just keeps popping up top of my "I'm On" list.
I will do as I'm told and ignore it now. 😁

But yes, VS, it could help someone else.

Not sure who you are accusing of being rude, but I guess it's me.
Seems we may have different definitions of being rude, you say it's me for defending people who continue to post and having a go at shouty posts, while you shout at them. Hmm

Press the little arrow in a red circle, top right, then press "hide thread"

Or it will die off without help after a while

I wouldn't let it bother you

It annoys me that people don’t read the subsequent posts
and just keep on keeping on delving in further and further.
It would be fine to say
Great that you ve solved it that’s what I would have done or you could have done a b c but to just completely ignore
Deedees great news is plain uncaring because it’s not acknowledging her achievement

It's just that posters might be wasting their breath time when DeeDe might have left the thread, or might feel obliged to keep answering kind posters.
We're only trying to help, no need to be rude.

If you know it is finished, there is no reason to continue reading the thread surely?
It just keeps popping up top of my "I'm On" list.
I will do as I'm told and ignore it now. 😁

But yes, VS, it could help someone else.

VioletSky

jaylou

It's a bit:

MERE MORTALS, THY GODS HAVE SPOKEN! SHUTETH UP!

Lol

I'd rather be a mortal than a God.
Someone with a similar problem may gain help from the later posts, they are doing no harm

Speaking for myself, red flags in a relationship is a useful thread to keep current

jaylou

It's a bit:

MERE MORTALS, THY GODS HAVE SPOKEN! SHUTETH UP!

Lol

Well done DeeDe a weight off your mind.
Not sure why some people are getting angry and writing shouty posts about the problem being resolved, when people are only trying to help, maybe they are in a rush and haven't time to read them all. If you know it is finished, there is no reason to continue reading the thread surely?

Well done DeeDe diplomatic and firm honesty is always the best.

For crying out loud the lady has sorted the problem
READ THE MORE RECENT POSTS PEOPLE PLEASE

I can see that you are a kind person, but he doesn’t seem to be right for you, and I can appreciate that you need to let him down gently - but firmly.
Love, despite our age, should still be looking forward to seeing him and not wanting him to go. It should still be doing things together and laughing. If you don’t have that, you might not even have a friendship.
Go and visit someone, if you can, and just not be there to open the door, after telling him, of course.
Value yourself. We need to be treated well. Age doesn’t come into it.

IT'S SORTED 🙂

Big girl knickers on here. Meet him for coffee and say it’s not working out - least said soonest mended, don’t hurt him more than you need to. Good luck!