95yr old frail stubborn mother

Please keep a detailed diary, get to a lawyer a.s.a.p, contact the care home, doctors and anyone else you can think of to put in place the truth and be insistent. I have heard of several cases, men falling for younger women, where the children have been totally excluded because of favours etc. Please check out the laws on elder coercion as time is of the essence. You need to act now, with determination. At the end of the day it is not about the inheritance, it is about defending your mother's right to free will. This person is a stranger.

So sorry to hear. Of your situation. I have elderly mother of 91 so I can certainly sympathise. You def need to see your solicitor. I’m setting up LPA currently and it takes at least 4 months to set up but your mother has to sign it with witnesses.
You are still her daughter, I had constant battles with my mother but she will still need you, she’s just confused now with this woman pushing herself forward. I’ve heard of this happening before to someone I know . Good luck

This sounds truly stressful! You have my sympathy and I hope it can be sorted out.

It does sound like the neighbour has been opportunist, to say the least.

'' "she's quite a forthright person it's her way or no way".''

there is however nothing illegal about this. If she is compos mentis, it is her right to be so. And a solicitor would have weighed this when witnessing the will.

In some countries, it is not possible to change will so that next of kin/close family do not inherit. In the UK, it is. But yes, you need to seek legal advice asap.

If your mother's second will was drawn up by a solicitor paininthearse it would be extremely difficult to contest it on the grounds that your mum was not of sound mind, as it will be presumed that the solicitor was certain she was, before drawing up the new will.

Does the home now have you registered as next of kin? You do need to arrange to see a solicitor asap, and preferably one with expertise in this field .

I agree Norah. A solicitor’s advice is needed. Please don’t feel worried or intimidated pita. I’m a retired solicitor. We are approachable. This will sounds rather dodgy to me but the only person who can tell you is a solicitor.

contacting Age UK first wish me luck

I'm not "wishing" you luck.

I'm "telling" you, please go to a solicitor, as soon this very moment.

GO to a solicitor, now.

I really do think you should show this will to a solicitor. If you as a layperson think it’s badly written it very probably is. Who are the witnesses to Mum’s signature?

When the Will was made last Oct mum would not tell me what she had done but I now know she told this person she was getting the house. To add insult to injury she made me executor so now I would have to hand over her property. I have seen the will as executor in my opinion it is very poorly written. She has given my grandson who is 12yrs old money but the solicitor has not made any mention of his money being put into trust till he is 18. It is very amateurish no letter heading or address about the solicitor. I am taking the advise and contacting Age UK first wish me luck and thanks again.

All of you have been so helpful....brilliant info too. Pink cosmos hit it on the head. My mum only sees a good friend no matter what I say she will deny she's been taken advantage of? Difficult but I must try to do something now. Citizens advice never answer the phone but I will try Age UK . Wish me luck.

I have a slightly similar experience with my late fil .who was in his late 80s We lived an hours drive away and an estranged cousin popped out of the woodwork very suddenly. He and his wife lived nearby my fil and were there all the time, visiting and taking him to his club and shopping . When my fil needed to go into a care home they wanted to get involved. However when they found out my fil didn’t own his home and had minimal savings , suddenly we didn’t see them again until the funeral two years later . 🤷‍♀️

pita’s mum has been groomed, pure and simple.

I am sure this could be considered financial abuse.

Quote below from NHS Safeguarding Adults leaflet

www.england.nhs.uk/wp-content/uploads/2017/02/adult-pocket-guide.pdf

Financial or material abuse –
including theft, fraud, exploitation,
coercion in relation to an adult’s
financial affairs or arrangements,
including in connection with wills,
property, inheritance or financial
transactions, or the misuse or
misappropriation of property,
possessions or benefits.

Citizens Advice

GSM gives good sound advice. If you can’t afford a solicitor you could try talking to Cotizens Advice or Age UK.

An elderly neighbour we helped over the years had fallen out with all the neighbours and had no family other than a distant niece on her husband’s side. Her mattiage hadn’t been happy.

She said she wanted us to inherit her house and she planned to change her will. We felt awkward as the help we had willingly given was done without ever expecting anything other than to help, awkward though she could be.

She died, we heard nothing and the niece moved into her house. Do you know fir sure the Will has actually been changed? Silly question but thought I would ask.

Contesting the will after Mum has died would be hugely costly pita. My advice is to see a solicitor now. The sooner you do that, the better equipped you will be to stop the abuse and protect your Mum and yourself. You may be advised to contact social services or even the police. This woman may have cultivated vulnerable people in this way before. It had happened before in a case I was told about. Maybe Mum doesn’t fully understand what she’s doing? The new will may be invalid because it was made under duress or because Mum didn’t understand her actions. You need advice now, not after Mum has gone. The solicitor can make enquiries of the firm which prepared the new will. Please go to a solicitor who specialises in dealing with the elderly as soon as you can. Good luck.

Thanks GSM I doubt mum will change her Will but how would a solicitor help now. Maybe after she's gone I can contest the
Will that's all I have. This neighbour has got her just where she wants her. My mother has been hateful to my son and her 12yr old great grandson. Someone has been poisoning her mind more than ever this year. The family stand to lose £400,000.00 to this woman it would have helped my son and grandson in the future. The woman already has property abroad. My mother has told her she has cut her grandson out of the Will and she is getting the house. If she was decent she would try and make her see sense. I wouldn't mind mum leaving her just some money but she is also getting some money too.

You need to consult a solicitor straight away. Your mother may have been acting under duress when she made the new will. You cannot set up a power of attorney without your mother’s consent and she has to be able to understand what she’s doing.

Unfortunately there are people who prey on vulnerable elderly people in this way. I have seen it happen.

Don’t delay.

I would set up Power of Attorney now
It can all be done online.

www.gov.uk/power-of-attorney/make-lasting-power

Thank you for your genuine advice as for Welbeck my mother refused a care package in hospital so was sent home without one. My mother and I had got on well over the years as for disparaging terms this is how it is. She has become bitter turned against her family other neighbours and friends over the years. Manager in the temp care home said tonight "she's quite a forthright person it's her way or no way". That's after four days. She weighed her up fast. So thanks for all those of you who really understands the situation and your kind remarks. Have tried to suggest POA last year just incase this happened but guess who told her she didn't need one.

Lawyer asap

Oh yes Casdon - you are sharp 😂

It can be very frustrating when you are looking after an elderly parent whose cognitive abilities are on the wane - and that is what this sounds like. I'm not saying dementia, I'm empathising as my own 90+ mother has been seeing things differently recently, after I have spent the last 20 years looking out for her (I say that advisedly- I haven't "looked after" her, but have helped with finances, hoping, hospital appointments etc etc). Suddenly I am persona non grata, and I do feel hurt. I also think it is a bit of "familiarity breeds contempt" - they take a huff for whatever reason, and look for someone else to step in. See a solicitor or at least Citizens Advice before it's too late. Really, we do not need this at our age! BTW I do not agree with @welbeck that you sound disparaging, but I can sense you are frustrated by it all.

Is this a genuine post - the OP name seems strange to me, and has never posted before?