He's ageing well, I'm not and he can't understand

He's not gloating over his good health. When he showed me his feet earlier it was more in the spirit of 'But look, I haven't got visible veins, so why have you?'

I've said to him we're different, we're ageing differently. I've pointed out that I've gone through the menopause and he hasn't and he's just asked why I didn't have HRT then. (I asked for it when I was menopausal, but in those days the fact that I had breast cancer in my family ruled it out).

He's not normally a stupid or particularly insensitive man. And I'm not usually this touchy. But I know I'm not ageing as well as some of the women we know (many of them on HRT) and it's not always easy to accept.

That sounds like a friend of mine and her husband. She has had a number of health issues over the years and is overweight. He is skinny and used to run. He had a major heart attack a few months ago, completely out of the blue and was clinically dead until the cpr worked. Everyone is different and I would point that out to him. Repeatedly

I realise that. Much of the time he's lovely. He just doesn't know what it's like to live in an ordinary body. He spends the day in the garden hedge-trimming and digging veg beds and the next day I ask him if he's stiff — and no. I don't know how he does it.

He doesn't put any effort into the way he looks, he's just been exceptionally lucky with his physique and his high metabolism. I think he assumes that I should be the same.

If DH behaved like your DH, I would firmly but surely tell him how it is and tell him to thank his lucky stars that he has aged so well, but also tell him that something like this can change overnight.

I knew someone like him (without the nasty streak). At 68 he was diagnosed with cancer and at 70 he was dead. His wife whose health had always been a bit dicey is still going strong at nearly 80.

I certainly wouldn't accept a partner, essentially gloating ove his health and pointing out my failings, especially that often a lot of these different outcomes are genetic and there is nothing you can do.

I have nothing helpful to say except how very annoying for you, Margot, but I'd also say that pride comes before a fall, and he's been a very lucky man so far but who knows how long it may last?

he sounds a peach.