My DIL will not allow my grandchildren to see my Daughter.

I am confused now.
Daughter fell out with her brother and his fiancé and there is also another son?
My son and his wife have a 3 year old and a 2 year old.

If the son with the wife and children had fallen out with your daughter it makes more sense - but it's the son with the fiancée who fell out with the daughter it seems.

Why had the other son got involved? Has your daughter since fallen out with the son with a fiancée too?

I feel that I haven't quite got this.
Sorry.

Either way. Can it be mended?

I also agree with everyone's responses. pascal's right, if they do say your D cannot be in your home when the children are there then tell them they'll have to make other arrangements.

I understand that you're worried that you'll be stopped from seeing your GC grannynoonoo but hopefully if you're politely firm, it wont come to that.

I do wish these parents would stop using their children to punish others with by withholding contact with no thought about how this could impact on them.

You've said your GD's adore their aunt so why effectively punish them when there's no need.

I hope you can find a workable solution and wish you luck.

I have a bad feeling about this. Was the falling out over something serious or do you feel DIL over reacted? My (now ex) DIL created a rift between herself and my DD - and having stopped DS having a relationship with his sister decided she didn't want us in their life either. Tread carefully

Tell your son to sort things out with his sister or you will not be able to have the children at your house, speak to your ex-husband and ask if he would do the same.

another set of parents thinking they can control their parents' living spaces.. don't let them.. if you choose to look after your daughter when she needs you, then just tell them they can find another solution to their childminding.. maybe then they'll grow up.. it's such entitled behaviour

You say that things have bobbed along albeit uncomfortable when they meet at my house or their dads house so I think there's no reason for them not to "bob along" in future.

They have not told you that you can't have the children when your daughter is there. I expect they will get over it if they want help with childcare!

If your daughter is living with you they will have to put up with it I think.

It's unreasonable to be made to choose between your child and your grandchildren! If they are awkward about it I'd remind them of this.

Can the fall-out be mended I wonder?

This should be : daughter-in-law will not allow her children to see their aunt. The incident took place at your ex-husband's home.
Wait until your daughter in law tells you what she wants, then deal with it accordingly.

We have a farm and my daughter is here most days as she has horses here so even when she is at her fathers or at her home previously she came before and after work.

I do not want to have to be in the position where i have to tell any of my family to stay away from my home. I have my granddaughters on a Tuesday and Saturday. Currently my daughter works on those days but when she has the baby she will be here on Saturdays. I also don't want my DIL to say I can't see my grandaughters.

Anpther who agrees with Lathyrus. If your daughter would normally be at your home when your son's children are there then he has to accept it or find someone else to look after them on that day.

I agree Lathyrus.

If it’s a day when she is normally living with you I don’t think it’s for them to say she can’t be there. On those days it is her home.

If the days when you look after the children are days when she would normally be at her fathers I think it would be wrong to have her over when you know the parents don’t wish that.