30th Wedding Anniversary dilemma.

We have just celebrated our 40th recently. We have booked a week away, went out for a lovely meal and I have booked a photo studio to have both formal and informal pics of us both and one with our best friend, our pet dog. Our AC are not interested and didn’t both sending cards or even texts, hence our pet is our mutually loyal family.

Went to the Big (red) Apple for 40th. As anniversary was near Christmas wanted to see New York at that time and the red symbol kind of represented the ruby colour of the anniversary.

The 30th wedding anniversary is pearl and I have posted here that received a beautifully wrapped gift of.... a bag of pearl barley! Mr C thought it hysterically funny. Me, rather less so.........

I hope you do better!

My DH and I have been together for 55 years but married 50 years (I think). He hates remembering his birthday and doesn't like to be reminded. One year I forgot and we didn't realise until a day or so later that it had passed by, unnoticed.

Neither of us are big on presents for birthdays although if we saw something the other would like we'd buy it as a present, regardless of the date.

I do celebrate my own birthday - had a lovely 60th with a friend the same age as me and our DHs. We went to Giorgio Locatelli's for lunch which was divine. For my birthday, just before covid hit we saw the Cirque du Soleil. Expensive but magical.

I'm the one that organises - I always have done, ever since I was at school and booked concert tickets for my friends and I - Tamla Motown Roadshow and Bob Dylan (solo) at the Albert Hall. I don't remember how I managed to pay - being still at school I didn't have a bank account. Those were the days - small venues and easy to get tickets, unlike today.

I had a friend in Suffolk who used to say that she would like her DH to take her on holiday or to buy such and such for her birthday. I don't know why she didn't organise the former or buy herself the latter since she had plenty of money.

The moral is - organise your celebration yourself and your DH will enjoy whatever you've planned.

Dcba

It’s our 60th anniversary next May…..and coincides with graduation from Uni of our eldest grandchild so we’ve decided to combine the two events in one trip - a true family celebration linking two generations.! And quite honestly I’m more excited about watching her graduate than our anniversary, even though we do realize ours is quite momentous!

I hope someone will organise a message from the King for your diamond wedding anniversary - here's how to apply: www.gov.uk/get-birthday-anniversary-message-from-king

It was my Sapphire wedding anniversary today. Given up on my husband organising anything. So I booked a table at a restaurant for the two of us bought myself a pair of sapphire earrings and we went out and enjoyed ourselves also bought my husband some commemorative coins as he collects them.
He did get me an orchid which is very unusual for him. October 2026is still along way off but if you want to celebrate tehn organise it

My DH was up for celebrations but not for organising them. I used to ring-fence a sum of money and give him a choice of two: a special trip or a party.
It was always a party! We did nothing for our 25th (too poor, children at uni) but 30th, 40th, 50th, pushed the boat out. We seemed to feel that staying in touch with friends, including being invited to their celebrations, was important. Now a widow, with friends in many places, I'm glad we did that.

if your husband is really not worried about what you do, perhaps you could either think of something that you have wanted to do for some time and not felt able to do for whatever reason. Then you would be glad to have tried something and he would be happy to go along with you Or you might think of something slightly offbeat that you both would try out for a first time such as hot air ballooning , or trying a dry ski slope for the first time. Just trying something new and feeling you are still after all these years able to try something new . Hope you enjoy whatever you decide to do .

It’s our 60th anniversary next May…..and coincides with graduation from Uni of our eldest grandchild so we’ve decided to combine the two events in one trip - a true family celebration linking two generations.! And quite honestly I’m more excited about watching her graduate than our anniversary, even though we do realize ours is quite momentous!

We did make a big deal of our 50th but otherwise a meal out or few days away have always been enough for us

NannaandPea

I have to fess up, I had a craft moment, we will have been married 40 years not 30 duh!
For our 25th we had a party (don’t want to do that again). For our 30th we went to Niagara Falls, For our 35th we went to Alaska in 2022 due to 2021 cruises being cancelled because of covid. We have spent the best part of our lives raising our 4 lads and still have 2 at home so getting away together is pretty special for us.

😂😂 I’d forgotten about’ craft moments’, I have them daily now!
We never did anything other than a trip to Paris for big anniversaries, with dinner on top of the Eiffel Tower ( organised by me, of course) on our 40th. I’m sure that if the Bodach had lived we’d have done the same for 50!
Unless you really want to have a big family do, I’d go for an extra special trip away.

Where would you like to go?

Yes just like other ladies on here I do all the organizing, don't actually think we would do anything if I left holidays, special birthdays, anniversaries, children, grandchildrens special occasions Christmas etc etc up to hubby.
It wouldn't even enter his head to organize anything.
Christmas and birthdays follow suit as far as I am concerned, never have a card or present without our daughter as mentioned it to him.
I remember one Christmas when my mother was alive and she said to me he's not bought you a present. I hadn't realized until mum mentioned it and I was so upset.

Why wait another 3 years to celebrate, start this year book a meal or a night away then build up to the big one in 3 years time. I always think a wedding Anniversary is for the 2 of you we usually do a meal at least. I have always been the instigator in doing something my hubby will remember and buy me a card/flowers but I am the make the arrangements.

Callistemon21

Planning three years in advance is not something I'd do either.

What did you do for your Silver Wedding Anniversary, NannaandPea?

Thinking about it, three years in advance is way too early, who knows the situation to money or health issues by then?
As it’s a Pearl Anniversary ask for a pearl ring or pendant.
The year before book either a cruise or a luxury coach holiday in places you really want to go? Or a really lovely hotel in UK for a few days?

You have been married for 40 years so you know your husband is not going to organise something for your anniversary, which is important to you if not to him.

You will feel upset if you don't celebrate, so why waste energy on hopes and dreams that won't be fulfilled? Use it to plan something special for just the two of you instead.

crazyH

Nannandpea - I feel excited for you. It’s so sweet - you’ve got 3 years of planning and saving. Yes, it is an achievement. Well done ! And I hope you have a wonderful time. My marriage fell apart at the 25th hurdle, although it had been limping for a few years before that. I have such admiration for couples who enjoy long marriages ❤️

Thank you for your warm wishes crazyH. I’m sorry that yours didn’t work out, I do hope that you have found peace and happiness since. Sending ❤️

I agree with many others. We never plan, it just happens that we may remember- then we go on a small week holiday. Nothing to do with other people, imo Anniversaries are personal.

I have to fess up, I had a craft moment, we will have been married 40 years not 30 duh!
For our 25th we had a party (don’t want to do that again). For our 30th we went to Niagara Falls, For our 35th we went to Alaska in 2022 due to 2021 cruises being cancelled because of covid. We have spent the best part of our lives raising our 4 lads and still have 2 at home so getting away together is pretty special for us.

I do understand, If I didn’t arrange everything we would go nowhere and do nothing, it’s tedious but at least we get to choose what we want to do.. well that’s what my dd told me.
Anniversary greetings

Nannandpea - I feel excited for you. It’s so sweet - you’ve got 3 years of planning and saving. Yes, it is an achievement. Well done ! And I hope you have a wonderful time. My marriage fell apart at the 25th hurdle, although it had been limping for a few years before that. I have such admiration for couples who enjoy long marriages ❤️

Planning three years in advance is not something I'd do either.

What did you do for your Silver Wedding Anniversary, NannaandPea?

Spot on, Meryl.

We never celebrate anniversaries and actually didn’t realise it was our 25th until we did the maths on the day - not that it would have made any difference. We have never been party or big celebrations people and don’t do ‘fuss’. Every day is important and we are never guaranteed tomorrow. I couldn’t imagine planning for anything three years hence but each to their own.

It is the Pearl Anniversary.
If you don't want to go too far you could go to Jersey and visit Jersey Pearl - perhaps your husband will treat you to a memento. 🙂

The Battle of Flowers is usually in August, not October but worth a thought.
There could be a Food Festival in the October.

Thoughts 🤔
It all depends on your budget. That could range from a meal at your local Indian ( others are available) to a trip on the Orient Express.