30th Wedding Anniversary dilemma.

As your husband is not bothered it is up to you to arrange something that you want to do, only you know what you would like to do and it sounds as though your husband will just go along with it.

I think of 25, (Silver) 40 (Ruby) and 50 (Golden) as the “biggies” but congratulations on your forthcoming 30th
Why not just arrange for a big lunch (to suit littlies, if there are any) for the whole family ?

My H and I just went out for a nice meal on our 30th.
On our 40th we went again for a really nice meal with our Son and pregnant DiL and with our pregnant D and her H
Such a happy time anticipating our first GC.
Just family times.
Our 50th we took all the family to Spain for two weeks.

We have been married 46 years and my husband sounds just like yours!

He has never organised anything, it’s all down to me.
I book meals, weekends away, trips out, holidays to celebrate certain wedding anniversaries during those years. He always enjoys whatever we do (after a bit of moaning about how busy he is) but I would literally collapse if he organised something special for us.

We have never celebrated our anniversaries in any particular way, other than a card and sometimes a meal out, or a short break for just us. Last October was our 40th, but we had our short break a month earlier- and it was to be our last. Always organised by me, of course. I once challenged DH as to why it always fell to me to organise our holidays and he said, Because you do it so well. There is no answer to that, so if you want something special for your 30th, OP, you know you have to organise it!

If he always enjoys it carry on as usual. No need to upset yourself to try and make a point.

Thoughts 🤔
It all depends on your budget. That could range from a meal at your local Indian ( others are available) to a trip on the Orient Express.

It is the Pearl Anniversary.
If you don't want to go too far you could go to Jersey and visit Jersey Pearl - perhaps your husband will treat you to a memento. 🙂

The Battle of Flowers is usually in August, not October but worth a thought.
There could be a Food Festival in the October.

Spot on, Meryl.

We never celebrate anniversaries and actually didn’t realise it was our 25th until we did the maths on the day - not that it would have made any difference. We have never been party or big celebrations people and don’t do ‘fuss’. Every day is important and we are never guaranteed tomorrow. I couldn’t imagine planning for anything three years hence but each to their own.

Planning three years in advance is not something I'd do either.

What did you do for your Silver Wedding Anniversary, NannaandPea?

Nannandpea - I feel excited for you. It’s so sweet - you’ve got 3 years of planning and saving. Yes, it is an achievement. Well done ! And I hope you have a wonderful time. My marriage fell apart at the 25th hurdle, although it had been limping for a few years before that. I have such admiration for couples who enjoy long marriages ❤️

I do understand, If I didn’t arrange everything we would go nowhere and do nothing, it’s tedious but at least we get to choose what we want to do.. well that’s what my dd told me.
Anniversary greetings

I have to fess up, I had a craft moment, we will have been married 40 years not 30 duh!
For our 25th we had a party (don’t want to do that again). For our 30th we went to Niagara Falls, For our 35th we went to Alaska in 2022 due to 2021 cruises being cancelled because of covid. We have spent the best part of our lives raising our 4 lads and still have 2 at home so getting away together is pretty special for us.

I agree with many others. We never plan, it just happens that we may remember- then we go on a small week holiday. Nothing to do with other people, imo Anniversaries are personal.

crazyH

Nannandpea - I feel excited for you. It’s so sweet - you’ve got 3 years of planning and saving. Yes, it is an achievement. Well done ! And I hope you have a wonderful time. My marriage fell apart at the 25th hurdle, although it had been limping for a few years before that. I have such admiration for couples who enjoy long marriages ❤️

Thank you for your warm wishes crazyH. I’m sorry that yours didn’t work out, I do hope that you have found peace and happiness since. Sending ❤️

You have been married for 40 years so you know your husband is not going to organise something for your anniversary, which is important to you if not to him.

You will feel upset if you don't celebrate, so why waste energy on hopes and dreams that won't be fulfilled? Use it to plan something special for just the two of you instead.

Callistemon21

Planning three years in advance is not something I'd do either.

What did you do for your Silver Wedding Anniversary, NannaandPea?

Thinking about it, three years in advance is way too early, who knows the situation to money or health issues by then?
As it’s a Pearl Anniversary ask for a pearl ring or pendant.
The year before book either a cruise or a luxury coach holiday in places you really want to go? Or a really lovely hotel in UK for a few days?

Why wait another 3 years to celebrate, start this year book a meal or a night away then build up to the big one in 3 years time. I always think a wedding Anniversary is for the 2 of you we usually do a meal at least. I have always been the instigator in doing something my hubby will remember and buy me a card/flowers but I am the make the arrangements.

Yes just like other ladies on here I do all the organizing, don't actually think we would do anything if I left holidays, special birthdays, anniversaries, children, grandchildrens special occasions Christmas etc etc up to hubby.
It wouldn't even enter his head to organize anything.
Christmas and birthdays follow suit as far as I am concerned, never have a card or present without our daughter as mentioned it to him.
I remember one Christmas when my mother was alive and she said to me he's not bought you a present. I hadn't realized until mum mentioned it and I was so upset.

Where would you like to go?

NannaandPea

I have to fess up, I had a craft moment, we will have been married 40 years not 30 duh!
For our 25th we had a party (don’t want to do that again). For our 30th we went to Niagara Falls, For our 35th we went to Alaska in 2022 due to 2021 cruises being cancelled because of covid. We have spent the best part of our lives raising our 4 lads and still have 2 at home so getting away together is pretty special for us.

😂😂 I’d forgotten about’ craft moments’, I have them daily now!
We never did anything other than a trip to Paris for big anniversaries, with dinner on top of the Eiffel Tower ( organised by me, of course) on our 40th. I’m sure that if the Bodach had lived we’d have done the same for 50!
Unless you really want to have a big family do, I’d go for an extra special trip away.

We did make a big deal of our 50th but otherwise a meal out or few days away have always been enough for us

It’s our 60th anniversary next May…..and coincides with graduation from Uni of our eldest grandchild so we’ve decided to combine the two events in one trip - a true family celebration linking two generations.! And quite honestly I’m more excited about watching her graduate than our anniversary, even though we do realize ours is quite momentous!

if your husband is really not worried about what you do, perhaps you could either think of something that you have wanted to do for some time and not felt able to do for whatever reason. Then you would be glad to have tried something and he would be happy to go along with you Or you might think of something slightly offbeat that you both would try out for a first time such as hot air ballooning , or trying a dry ski slope for the first time. Just trying something new and feeling you are still after all these years able to try something new . Hope you enjoy whatever you decide to do .