i think my husband is rude

What are you really annoyed about OP?

Your DH is an adult, your mum is an adult and you are an adult.

It seems to me that you think both your mum and dh are children, and you’re somehow the one in charge?

What’s really annoying you?

Teabags55 you haven’t commented. Are you ok?

Just a thought - we don’t have all the facts but from what you write it’s unbelievable discourteous. Your Mother will have noticed and perhaps silently perturbed. This needs addressing ASAP otherwise it’s abuse.
Please give an update.

This is rude behaviour regardless of who is at home, but your Mother! Well I’m sure I’d not have allowed this to go unchallenged. When you were young your mother did her best for you (hopefully) it’s NOW your turn to have your Mothers back! Why did you let this go? What a rude man!

Yes extremely rude. At her age he should show a little more kindness and empathy. You are his wife but she is your Mother and at her age deserves respect.

I think I would have been rather concerned if my husband didn’t greet my mother on Christmas Day. Certainly would not have left it 2 hours without asking him why.

Sounds rude, on the information given, but maybe he just does not 'get' it? I would have got him after a few minutes and asked him to sort out drinks for you both.

I assume you told him what you thought of him at the time.
Is there more anybody can add?

We have a large kitchen/diner/living room. So we can all chat whilst cooking or prepping, and no one gets left out . My mother sits in a wing chair which is higher than our sofas or we pile cushions on another chair .
In the op situation I would have moved the higher chair into the living room. And yes I think your dh was rude .

You obviously thought he was rude. Not sure why you would need confirmation from us lot. Speak to him??

Depends how long you been married to him if couple of weeks I would be having words if you been married years I’d say you must know what he’s like by now and I’d still be having words with him lol

Ziplok

It’s unkind to pull posters up over their grammar. I’m guessing you understood what was being said, so why the unpleasant remark? Totally unnecessary.

Yes, that was bloody rude, bad form, and unpleasant.

I do wonder what your mum thought. Even at 95 my mum had views about how things should be done and made sure people knew it. If she expected someone to include her and they didn't she made sure they knew about it.

I’m afraid I’d have put him in the kitchen preferably preparing the meal
😁

We used to bring a dining chair into the lounge so our relative could be both comfortable and part of the gathering. I’m afraid I’d have put him in the kitchen preferably preparing the meal

No you are not wrong, in my opinion, but what happens in other peoples families is not my business and I would not wish to pass judgement on something which does not concern me.

I agree with everything that has been said. Unfortunately these things happen. My first husband was an absolute pig and my mam hated him and he hated her. How is your husband with your mam normally? My 2nd husband loved my mam, probably more than me. Then my 3rd husband was great with my mam until she sadly died, aged 99 years back in 2009. We only get one mam and believe me, husbands come ten a penny, I’ve now got husband number 3! He is better trained and usually makes the christmas dinner with my help. This year my son and his partner made it. Boot him out!

BlueBelle

Why not ask him these questions I don’t see at all how anyone here could possibly read your husbands mind to know why he didn’t go to speak to her in 2 hours ?? A mystery only he can answer and his answer will probably be ‘oh did you need me to I thought you were looking after her’

Precisely.

Who knows how a man's mind works?

shut him in a room and ignore him and see what his response is

Gwyllt

May I be so bold as to ask how well your husband usually get on with your mum.
Did your mum pass any comment
Do you think she had a problem

I was thinking that as well. My DH would vanish fishing when either mother visited, my mum did not mind as my father had been a fisherman as well.
My MIL did and took it out on me for many years until I told her it was her son and to tell him. Where I come from the saying is, "I don't know who brought you up?"I could hear it in the kitchen and DH turned and told her she did and if his father was still alive maybe he would not have to disappear.
You don't know your husband's motives.

It’s unkind to pull posters up over their grammar. I’m guessing you understood what was being said, so why the unpleasant remark? Totally unnecessary.

Apologies,I realise most of my points have already been made!!!

Sorry but I need more information before I can comment! Who else was in your house and did they greet your Mother? Why did you not simply say to your husband “ mums here, she has to sit in the kitchen - go and say hello”. Why did you not take the higher chair your mother needed into the room where your husband/other company was so she was not isolated (assuming she was?) What is your husbands usual attitude towards your Mother? Is he usually a rude person by habit? Could it be he was totally unaware she was there? Sorry, but I cannot help feeling there must be an explanation for his behaviour!

I'm more concerned that you used 'of' instead of 'have'

Millie22

At 92 she's a bit old for a high chair.

Brilliant 😂