Petition: Give legal right of contact between grandchildren and grandparents

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SingcoTime

Yes, GSM it does sound obsessive that you think I need to prove to you why I know about public things posted on a public forum.

You think I need proof?

DiamondLily

I’d like to have the time to sit scrolling through old forum posts looking for something to bash posters with. How odd.😗

Yet you have time to be here every single day. All posts we click on are choices. If the days I choose to log on to gransnet I click on an old thread vs a new, what does it matter one way or another? No one actually needs to spend any time on any thread. It's all voluntary. My point was that people who have actually been disciplined for bullying, and the proof is on gransnet, shouldn't causally accuse others when their behaviour has been much more egregious. It's odd that anyone thinks there are certain obligations in terms of which threads should and shouldn't be read.

MissAdventure

I expect that's why nobody here has signed it.

😂😂😂

Always succinct MissAdventure 👍

eddiecat78

Ok, SingcoTime if your "cause" is not to persuade others to your way of thinking exactly what are you doing here? 99.9% of people - including several who are estranged - have said they don't agree with the petition - and yet you still see fit to go on the attack

Choose to disengage if you have a problem. You're not compelled to respond to everything you read. You do realize that, right?

I’d like to have the time to sit scrolling through old forum posts looking for something to bash posters with. How odd.😗

Yes, GSM it does sound obsessive that you think I need to prove to you why I know about public things posted on a public forum.

I learnt a long time ago here, there is no point in arguing with people who enjoy it

Ok, SingcoTime if your "cause" is not to persuade others to your way of thinking exactly what are you doing here? 99.9% of people - including several who are estranged - have said they don't agree with the petition - and yet you still see fit to go on the attack

sounds a bit obsessive to me GSM.

Norah

DiamondLily

Family Courts are supposed to abide by the Children Act and ensure that the needs of the child are paramount.

The rights of children should outstrip any rights of parents or grandparents.🙂

This. Children own the rights, as they should.

I suspect estrangement is logical to the person estranging. I doubt GPs are abusive in most instances. More a conflict over what is acceptable raising children - times change. People don't always raise children as in times past, nor do they want their children treated as they were. Simple, really. Not abuse.

True. But it is this conflict that often leads to parental alienation and undermining when the grandparent refuses to accept the reduced role in rearing children that do not belong to them. My MIL was not abusive per se, but she was undermining and critical of us in front of them. She thought she knew better about everything, and when that arrogance lead to an incident, we decided she wasn't trustworthy to be left alone with our children ever. She of course went several steps further and was estranged after threatening us.

I agree fully that not everything is about direct abuse to the children. Sometimes it's the secondary harm of having conflicting "authority" figures confusing the children that is the issue.

A very sensible contribution to the discussion Norah.

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Germanshepherdsmum

Even if a deleted post could be read, that would not tell the reader that the poster had been suspended or banned.

No, the conversations across the various threads will...

Absolutely. It’s not about parental control or GP control. It’s about the child.

Most families aren’t abusive.🙂

Thank you GSM I do think that posts posting untruths about another poster say an awful lot about those making them don't you.

I think SingcoTime must have you mixed up with someone else DL "passive aggressive"; "sometimes downright catty"; not that is most definitely not you.

TBH SingcoTime I'm not seeing much if any self awareness in any of your posts.

Like you Shropshirelass I prefer to let things be. I've often said I wouldn't our GS's turning up on our door step one day because as you say it would be very unsettling, and it's been hard enough living with their loss without having them suddenly there in your life, a stark reminder of all that you missed out on.

DiamondLily

Family Courts are supposed to abide by the Children Act and ensure that the needs of the child are paramount.

The rights of children should outstrip any rights of parents or grandparents.🙂

This. Children own the rights, as they should.

I suspect estrangement is logical to the person estranging. I doubt GPs are abusive in most instances. More a conflict over what is acceptable raising children - times change. People don't always raise children as in times past, nor do they want their children treated as they were. Simple, really. Not abuse.

Even if a deleted post could be read, that would not tell the reader that the poster had been suspended or banned.

Germanshepherdsmum

You seem familiar with those who have been suspended or banned.

You're going to be shocked at this. On the internet, particularly on discussion forums, you can actually click on any previous link and read. They aren't deleted by the websites. Many people who use the internet do not find it difficult to simply click on old threads and read. Now, this may be far from your personal activities, but other people read threads whether there are recent comments or not. Believe it or not, things don't just disappear from the internet simply because they aren't top of mind to an individual. I hope that clears it up for you!

SingcoTime

DiamondLily

I honestly don’t know why you are arguing so aggressively.

All of the regular posters on here agreed that petitions weren’t the way to go, whatever the relationships status.

But, we are allowed an opinion, much based on life and work experience, to express what we think, and that parents don’t always have the best interests of their children at heart.

Most do, just as most GPs are happy, loving supports and not toxic maniacs wanting control of all things.

This is a forum.

You perceive it as aggressive. That doesn't mean it is. That's simply your opinion. Mine differs. Opinions and feelings aren't facts.

You do realize that you are in no way shape or form compelled to read and/or respond, right? Wouldn't that be the more sensible approach than trying to dictate to someone else how to posts? I find the majority of your posts across many threads to be passive aggressive and sometimes downright catty but I don't sit around discussing it with you. I either address it or don't. Amazing, this whole free-will thing.

Ok. Whatever you say.🙄. Have a fun day.

I think it is very sad when grandparents no longer see their grandchildren when they have been part of their lives, however, I won’t sign as I have never met mine, I didn’t even know of their existence until a little bird told me, they are now teenagers and live on the other side of the world. If I suddenly appeared it would be very unsettling so I prefer to leave things be. Maybe one day they might be curious we will wait and see.

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