How would you deal with this?

I have had a terrible row with my eldest grandson (14) whilst I was childminding him and his 2 brothers. He's very disrespectful of me and very aggressive towards the other 2. I walked out and told my daughter I'd had enough. I feel bad but this boy is not good for my mental health. My daughter says he's just a child but I'm really fed up with him.

Adda, you need to start a new thread for your problem. Go to Forums, select a topic and click on Start new thread.

I'm sad and worried because 37 yr old my son doesn't know how to handle his anger issues with his children and wife. I blame myself for this because of how I wasnt able to deal him on his struggles as a child. He is my second child of 3 and my relationship with their father was not so good. And I don't know how to help him now more than ever. I just want to fix things so he can be a happy and loving dad to his kids.

Aren't there other people in the group whom you would like to get to know? Surely they aren't all in the one big clique. See if you can walk beside someone else and have a sensible conversation, or else walk in companionable silence which would have been my choice.

Do you like being part of this group, with its nosey clique? It doesn’t sound very enjoyable. Do you actually get something positive out of it or do you just dread what intrusive questions will be asked next time? I would ponder that very seriously.

Juwels I think it wouldn’t be suitable to use the lovely cradle , it should be kept as an heirloom
I also think it would be better to start a new thread to get answers

Yoginimeisje

Get a dog and walk with her/him. You will chat to many people but it will be just a light hearted quick exchange and move on.

Wise advice ..

I find it difficult dealing with nosy people too. Some of these tips are great

This is why I don’t join a walking group. I prefer to go for a walk by myself with my thoughts, without being interrupted. Mind you, I guess if you are part of a group, you won’t slack. Today for instance, is a beautiful day, but I haven’t stepped out of the door 😂

We have a baby cradle that has been in the family for generations (still in very good condition) I would like my son & DIL to use it for their 1st baby. I asked my son if they would want to use it and he said probably not. Should I take that as a no? It would really mean a lot to me if they did. Am I just being over sensitive that more than likely they won’t use it.

Thank you all so much for your very kind and helpful suggestions which I will put in action in my future walks with that particular individual. I now feel prepared to politely divert her attention onto something else. A huge thank you to you all. It is so appreciated.

I like the “Oh, don’t ask” response. Or you could go for, “Gosh, you ask a lot of questions”, and quickly start discussing something you notice as you walk…. “I see the primroses are out. They look so beautiful. I just love to focus on what I see when I’m out walking”.

A good friend of mine always answers people’s nosy questions with ‘oh don’t ask’ with a wry smile on her face.

I have experienced this in the past with a particular person ever time I met her, even when I went to the library where she worked. I decided to turn it around by asking her questions back which she couldn't fathom at first and it certainly worked. It's worth a try.

Turn up beaming with joy and when she asks, tell her you've had a jolly decent win on the lottery/premium bonds! She’s the sort that will be so green with envy she’ll go and bother some other poor soul!

Sympathies with you Flower it’s heartbreaking enough without people like her. In the same situation as you and I would just say, I don’t discuss my personal situation, , failing that say sorry I don’t discuss my family, then leave it at that, she’ll probably stomp off but so what.. I wouldn't want her as a friend anyway, just t stick with it for the walk and others will speak if you’re friendly and smile.

Get a dog and walk with her/him. You will chat to many people but it will be just a light hearted quick exchange and move on.

Could you say 'I don't want to think of family right now. ' Then ask her if she has done such and such walk or something else? Good luck.

I’m with some of the other posters on this, Flower21.
I dealt with a similar person in the same way as biglouis. My answer took the wind out of her sails and she’s done everything to avoid me, even leaving our book group. Job done!

You shouldn't have to find a new walking group to avoid this nosey person who clearly has no interest in the group but uses it as a means to 'get the gossip' and intrude in peoples lives

The next time she questions you stop walking, look her directly in the face and say "My family, My business"..........say nothing else. Then continue with your walk.

Hopefully, she, and all those in her clique who are intent on learning every one else's business will move on and go bother some one else.

Enjoy your walking activities and the peace it brings you

I am another one who joined a walking group because I thought it was safer than walking alone. I also found that people want to know all about your personal life.
Another thing that bothered me was that the walks always ended up with a visit to a pub, and I don't drink.
I quickly left the group as there was little pleasure in it. I now do my walking alone.

Just tell her you don’t wish to discuss personal things and you are here for a quiet walk, then walk away.

Don’t enable her.

"I dont mind you asking me rude personal questions so long as you dont mind my not answering them!"

I used to say variations of this to my nosy neighbour and then walk away.

There is also the good old Mumsnet standby-

"Do you mean to be so rude or is it a special effort for my benefit?!

I'm sorry about your problems with your daughter.
Many of us on here have had similar difficulties, and if you wanted to read about others stories, or join in discussions at any time, look for the Estrangement threads. You may find it helpful.

As for your nosey walking companion, have you told her anything about yourself? Is this why she keeps coming back for further installments?
If not or even if you have, can you say sorry I prefer to walk and take in the surroundings as I do so. Or this is my time to relax so I don't like gossiping.

If this is too intimidating for you perhaps you should think about another walking group.
This time is important for your self esteem, and you deserve it.
Best of luck

Flower21 you seem to be such a kind soul. I am sorry to hear that this lady is ruining what should be a peaceful walk in nature. I think I would gently make it clear to her that you are having a walk for health and enjoyment and you would like to move on to a different subject. Peace be with you !