Boys' holidays?

My DH doesn’t play golf but he’s been on fishing and clay pigeon shooting trips and I’m happy for him to go . I’ve been on girls holidays and trips with my DD .
It sounds like you don’t trust him .

Years ago, recently widowed i went with a friend to Spain, very nice hotel. After tge evening meal we went to the bar for a drink, a group of middle aged, well dressed golfers were staying there. They were a right pain, the drink flowed and they soon had ladies around them, buying drinks, arms round each other. We went iff to bed and left them to it. The next day after breakfast we were walking to the pool when out of the bushes came one of the golfers with a very young girl close behind, i don't think any golf was played that day although he was dressed for it, his clothes were a crumpled mess,

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My husband regularly goes on golf trips to Spain with his golfing friends. He's 70 .... most of the others are older! He's been doing this for years

Oh yes. He doesn't want to do anything these days except play on his phone and computer, watch sport and talk about his ailments and of course play golf which always comes first and which he manages to do even with all his health problems. Sleeps a lot too. I do my own thing now and love it.

I bet you felt like putting his golf cub to a new, novel use!
Do you think he'll stick to his guns about not going away as a couple, still?

We have not been abroad for over ten years as he has had DVTs and a pulmonary embolism and said he didn't want to fly. Last November he said he needed to renew his passport. When i asked why his reply was that he knew it wasn't very fair on me, but he was going to Portugal to play golf.
My reply was unprintable and I did suggest that he should stay there. It hasn't been spoken about at all since that day even though he still went!

Arrange a girls own holiday at the same time. It can be at home or abroad. What will a bunch of girls get up to while on holiday?

Alegria56

Is it ok for a 62 year old man to still want holidays “ golf” abroad with his mates? I’m really uncomfortable with this and can’t help thinking guys get up to all sorts.

Unless you have reason to be suspicious (past behaviour of him or his mates) what on earth reason is there for you to be 'thinking guys get up to all sorts.'

DH and I have at various times throughout our married lives gone on separate holidays so that we could follow our other intersts and the thought going through your mind has never occurred to either of us.

The question is, why are you thinking it?

He is still my sunshine. 🌞

That's lovely 🥰

Ha ha V3ra
I rarely tell him things - and if I did he would probably laugh and "pointedly" ignore me!

The nicest complement I think was when my adult daughter stayed the night unexpectedly and was (apparently) woken early in the morning by the peals of laughter from us.
She said she felt that "all was right in the world".

I suppose we are very lucky that we are still each other's best friend in spite of the fact that we do get cross/exasperated (!) with each other and fed up now and then.

There is nobody I'd rather spend time with than him... especially on holiday.
He is still my sunshine. 🌞
I am happy to be joined at the hip to this remarkable man.
Still feel very blessed.

NotSpaghetti

We are pretty much "joined at the hip" V3ra but I'd still be happy to have my lovely husband go away with friends if he wanted to.

Tell him everyone's doing it these days, and it's for his own good 😅

My Dad wouldn't have been allowed to.

I am not in your position regarding holidays my DH health isn’t great so going on a trip even here in UK can be hard work.

I would enjoy the break from routine if my DH went away with friends but that isn’t going to happen.

Stock up on treats and some nice wines or tipple of choice sit back do what you want. Maybe enjoy the company of friends and relish the YOU time I know I would!

We are pretty much "joined at the hip" V3ra but I'd still be happy to have my lovely husband go away with friends if he wanted to.

Sounds like it's you that has the problem very insecure. Wish mine would go on holiday lol x

Iam64

My husband died almost two years ago. We’d always had happy holidays together as well as separately with friends. Thst has helped me a little in adjusting to the knowledge I live alone

One of my widowed friends said if I didn't take her on holiday, she wouldn't go anywhere.
My husband and I agree that it's important to maintain a social life apart from each other, because there will come a time when one or the other of us will be left alone.
My parents were joined at the hip and when Mum died, Dad was completely lost. He'd never had any friends. He went to pieces.

Well Alegra hasn’t been back so make of that what you will either she didn’t like the answers or it was not a real problem in the first case

Hes 62 not 22! I assume his mates are same age? Don't you trust him??? My SIL goes Golfing holidays abroad as does his dad. Golf and 18th hole repeat....

My husband died almost two years ago. We’d always had happy holidays together as well as separately with friends. Thst has helped me a little in adjusting to the knowledge I live alone

My LH went away every year with a group of his army friends visiting different battlefields, every two years he flew out to the far east to stay with a friend plus he was often away at weekends due to his work. Would never have crossed my mind to question what he was up to. If he had wanted to stray he would have done so. Think it is healthy to spend time apart. Just wish he was still here.

Its fine to have boys holidays. Excellent that he is able to enjoy friendships with other men. You are lucky. You get some time to yourself to engage perhaps in a girls day - make up session, sorting your wardrobe, seeing friends he doesn't particularly like etc. Enjoy your 'me' time. Tomorrow I take mine to the station to join a walking holiday abroad for 2 weeks. How lovely to have the house to myself! Get up when I want, eat when I want, sit around reading, chatting to friends etc. No one else to thing about. Just lovely. Enjoy your husband's absence. Look forward to his return. We are having a lovely wine and dine at home night tonight. All very romantic.

If a partner strays - it can happen anywhere, no need to go abroad.

I'm a widow now but we occasionally had separate holidays. I think we appreciated eachother more afterwards.

Obviously a trust issue here, do you have reason to worry about your husband going away with his friends Alegria56
I think it's healthy for retired people to have some separate interests, we don't need to be joined at the hip 24/7.

That's a sad generalisation flappergirlto say no man is trustworthy. I'm sorry if you have had bad experiences.

I hope and trust the man in question is not your husband!

If he is, either you have grounds for questioning his truthfulness and have put up with it for years, or otherwise you for some reason do not trust him.

A sad state of affairs.

How about letting him go off golfing, and find some hobby you can go off on your own to do at times?