Knowing who your friends are.

I have a lovely friend who has been wonderful to me and mine over many years.
Our friendship deepened when first she showed sounds of severe mental illness and I tried to be as helpful as I could be. Many of her friends melted away, never to return.
Friends stay the course with you: acquaintances do not.

I have one friend who has been with me through fair and foul weather….through my health scare, separation, divorce etc. We go back nearly 50 years. I was there for her, driving way past midnight to pick her up, when there was a ‘glitch’ in her marriage and brought her back to stay with me for a couple of days. Fortunately, her marriage survived.
She has moved to live nearer her son, so I don’t see her as often as Iid like. She is a good friend, not just to me, but to everyone who is privileged to call her a friend.
Btw she will be so embarssed if she reads this - she is not on GN

Indigo8. I also discovered that I was very convenient as I had a car.

I think there is a huge difference between someone offering to help rather than me having to ask which I would never do. A lot of people are only out to gain brownie points!

Sorry may have got confused,
thinking schadenfreude meant fate!
Sorry idiot moment! 🤣

I have one proven true friend & sometimes I cannot stand him & him me! Despite arguing like cat & dog for 40yrs, I know that he would go to the ends of the earth for his children, myself and his old dog. In that way I am very lucky. Yet, oddly, I knew that I was going to marry him the moment I met him. Even though I didn't particularly like him at all!!!
Very strange. Is this schadenfreude,🤔

I too have had friends of the "Ask not what I can do for you, ask what you can do for me" variety. They often make the right noises about "being there for you" etc. but when it comes to it there is always a reason why they can't.

When I decided not to drive anymore and sold my car my friendship group dwindled quite rapidly.

I was also have had what I call foul weather friends who seem to delight in mine and the misfortunes of others. I believe the Germans call it schadenfreude.

I have written a comment on another thread too.

Since my DH went into the care home I have found out who my friends are. It was good when we, especially him, were doing favours, but now most people do not even bother to ask after him or check if I am alive.

I am both disappointed and disgusted.

After an accident I found those who would run to my aid from wherever they were. I, too, had lots of cards and 'let me know if I can help' messages after DH died but many of those people never got in touch again.
I am lucky to still have those who I can rely on.