Why do I feel like BF has taken advantage or is it just DH overreacting?

woodenspoon

Ask your friend to have it back. Say DH finds it uncomfortable and he needs/ doesn’t need a recliner.
If she won’t, then you’ve learned something about her.
Then, try to sell it on Facebook marketplace, eBay or gumtree.
Then, you and DH start again and buy one you both like.

Buyers of second hand sofas want these from a smoke fee home.

ftm420

Allira: DS27 = Dear Son, aged 27
CrazyH: BF = Best Friend!

😁
Well, I was getting worried, thinking you had a lot of children!

I agree with the general feeling to just let it go & not buy from friends again.

She does have bit of form - we've been out recently for lunch. I paid for food, she bought 2 cokes! She and her family have a tendency to borrow things and break them too. DH won't lend to them any more.

He's learned. It's taking me a bit longer.

Allira: DS27 = Dear Son, aged 27
CrazyH: BF = Best Friend!

If it’s comfy just get a throw to cover up the marks whilst you and dh save up for a new one.

Buyer beware even if buying from a friend. I think you need to chalk this one up to experience ftm420 and move on. Perhaps your husband should do the same.

Ask your friend to have it back. Say DH finds it uncomfortable and he needs/ doesn’t need a recliner.
If she won’t, then you’ve learned something about her.
Then, try to sell it on Facebook marketplace, eBay or gumtree.
Then, you and DH start again and buy one you both like.

mumofmadboys

Now you have bought the sofa let it go. It's done. You can't really go back on it. Make the best of it and don't dwell on it anymore and ask your DH not to mention it again.

I agree. Second hand sofas don’t fetch much money but your friend may not have known that. Can you put a nice throw on it?

Your husband and son collected the sofa and brought it home - so they surely have some responsibility here? If it’s in bad enough condition for DH to “have a go at you” about it perhaps they shouldn’t have brought it home!

There’s not much you can do about it now though as you paid your friend upfront rather than “cash on collection” . If you like the sofa and it’s comfortable and in good “used” condition apart from the scuffs then buy a nice throw / blanket to cover the damage.

If you were happy with it in the first place I would concentrate on that. Budgets vary, and although it was inevitable that someone would start going on about how they paid so much more for their sofa (this is GN after all ) the point is that you got a sofa you liked for a price you are happy with, and it is an improvement on the one you had.

You say the scuffs are barely noticeable, so it doesn’t sound as though the sofa is ‘skanky’. What is it made of? If leather, you can get cleaner that might remove them, and coloured cream that could cover scuffs. (Cobblers often sell these products). If fabric, you can get upholstery cleaner (in a bottle with a sponge on the top) that is very good with marks, (supermarkets or Home Bargains) and if the scuffs are on wood you can get sets of what are basically felt tips in wood colours that you mix and match to cover scratches and chips. (Amazon or possibly Yorkshire Trading).

You will have known that it belonged to a smoker before you bought it, so I assume any smell doesn’t bother you, but maybe a good clean will get rid of some of it if you are a non-smoking household.

Honestly - ignore the naysayers (including your husband!) and enjoy your new sofa. It’s a done deal now, anyway.

Chalk it up to experience ftm or, as my dad used to say: "Take it in your stride." And tell your DH to stop moaning.

I think you can only blame yourself for not thoroughly examining the sofa before handing over £175, which is too much to pay for a damaged, second-hand piece of furniture. Charities, these days, do not accept items like these, especially without the fire safety label. If it has caused a rift between you and your husband, maybe consider buying another one, which you choose together?

Also seen the bit re the fire safety label - and I got rid of a small sofa I had previously (maybe would be around £500 new???) and it was a problem to get rid of and in the end I just gave it away to a local charity - and they made sure it had a fire safety label on it before they came and fetched it. If it hadn't had that safety label then not even a charity would have taken it.

Barleyfields

If it would cost £350 brand new I wouldn’t describe it as a good quality make. I think your friend has taken advantage of you. Perhaps she had something draped over the marks when you saw it? Anyway, too late now but I’m not surprised at your husband’s reaction.

Maybe there's a missing "0" at the end of the price?

But yep....I was thinking that my sofas were respectively £2,500 (sofabed) and £700 (small sofa) and I regard them as reasonable (mid-price range) quality.

....and I agree that she's charged you too much for this sofa. Say £350 brand new would maybe be £100 secondhand? and then knock some off that for the marks.

Did she point out the marks to you - or say nowt and hope you wouldn't notice until too late? She was defo due to say "BTW - there are the following marks at such and such point on it" and doing anything other than commenting on it would get interpreted by me as "She knew and deliberately said nothing....!!!"

Your friend has ripped you off OP, she saw you coming.

Chances are even local charities didn’t want it because of the skanky condition you describe.
It’s not worth a light.
So, did she see you coming? Yes.

Friendship is worth nore than the sofa or the money. Don't go back on the deal. I agree with others . Don't buy from friends. Cut your losses and live with the sofa or buy another one that both of you see before you buy.

I would have only offered £50, £75 tops for a sofa that was £350 new, considering it has scuff and scorch marks also. Doubt anyone else would have bought it for much more. So yes, I think she has taken advantage.

I hope your DH isn’t giving you to much grief over this OP?
These things happen and I’m sure you’ll have learned a valuable lesson.

You could ask your BF to take it back, but I doubt you’d be successful there. I think you’ll have to make do for a couple of years, then maybe explore SCS or DFS who sell decent sofas with 4 years interest free credit.

Don’t let this get you down.

Now you have bought the sofa let it go. It's done. You can't really go back on it. Make the best of it and don't dwell on it anymore and ask your DH not to mention it again.

Unless it was really good condition, I think half new price is a lot to pay for a second hand sofa.

Should have offered £50, and perhaps compromised on £75.

Plus your DH fetched it, she didn’t have to deliver it.

And she was a smoker!

Yes, you’ve been ‘done’.

She has taken advantage of you, sorry.

Does this settee have a (visible) a Fire Safety label?
If not, you could tell her that your family aren't happy with the potential risk it could cause and that you wish to return it.

DS27

Assuming that is a typo! 😁
Unless you're the old woman who lives in a shoe, which I'm sure you're not!

How old is this sofa?
If more than 2 years old then she has vastly over-charged you. It has obviously been well used. How did it get scorch marks on the arm? Is she a careless smoker? Does it smell of smoke?

I'd not be best pleased if I was your DH either.