Gifts - are there 'age limits'?

18

I've been giving a small monetary gift to my neighbours child for the past few years. She's 12 now. Didn't get acknowledgement of thank you this time. I think that's the last

I would love it if someone would answer this for me. When my children were teenagers their paternal grandmother decided to stop presents at 18. That Christmas my two sons received the usual presents from their Nana but my daughter aged just 18 got nothing. She was quietly very hurt and I was hurt on her behalf. I've never forgotten that so can't bear to do that for my grandchildren. Whereas I see the principle I can't bring myself to do it. How do others manage this?

One of my four grandsons aged 25 visited me with his partner and baby son. I gave them a substantial sum of money in an envelope and a bag full of gifts for my great grandson. I did not get a thank you and neither did they open the gifts or the envelope.
During the visit he humiliated me, and then went on to ask how much will I gey for my home when I die!! H
e will no long receive a birthday or Christmas gift, he will receive a card and baby will have birthday and Christmas gifts.

I've always stopped at 18 or 21. My nephew and neice who are still under that age both live abroad so sending gifts has become increasingly expensive. The last ones I sent were not acknowledged and as they are not blood relatives of mine - I'm divorced from their father's brother - I decided not to continue this year. Their parents are separated and they live in different countries one with each parent. I haven't seen either of them since my son's wedding 8 years ago which they attended. The nephew was only a baby so I don't know him at all. The niece used to message me with thanks but didn't last time. I don't know if the gifts even arrived!

I just don't see the point of giving to people, even if they are relatives, if you never see them or receive no acknowledgment of the gift

You have to let them go and give your appreciation to those who you do see and care for you.

Otherwise you are beating yourself up totally unnecessarily.

We never quit giving, but that is our choice.

In my biological father's eyes, it was at 13 as that is when they became a man according to his religion...which he'd never followed in any other way in his life. He was just so tight, he squeaked. We never expected presents from him, he wouldn't even give my Mum the Court Ordered maintenance!

I stopped giving my niece and nephew anything when they stopped responding to messages/cards/phone calls. We didn't fall out but they just don't consider it important to keep in touch. It wasn't just me, it was all my mother's side of the family.

Yes. I would stop. Tell them though.

I only have one grandchild and she is 9. She will probably get presents until I'm gone!

My three nieces and one nephew all live in Australia. I sent Christmas presents and birthday presents until they were 18. Then again for their 30th birthday.

I now have two great nieces and a great nephew, all living in Australia. They all had presents when they were born and Christmas and birthday presents.

From what I remember, the neices and nephew always sent a 'thank you' and the parents of the great nieces and great nephew sent a 'thank you'.

I send b'day and Christmas gifts to one nephew and now he's married with a child I also send gifts for the child. Seen the child just once and the nephew once in probably 20 yrs. Never had a thank you or more importantly hear whether gifts have actually arrived in the post but continue to send for the sake of my brother who is the nephew's father and sends gifts to my offspring - who always send thank you notes. Often wonder if anybody would get in touch if any gifts didn't arrive?!

I'd say 18 is the cut-off point when they reach adulthood. An extra special present for their eighteenth then no more.

Norah

We never quit giving, but that is our choice.

Great nieces and great nephews too, then great-great nieces and nephews etc?

If I did that, I'd need a bank loan. I already have many great nieces and nephews and at least seven great-greats!

My cut off is starting secondary school

I give money to mine, when they visit near their birthday. i will post a card but not a cheque or money. If it wasn't acknowledged, which ut always is, it would stop, that applies to everyone.
Mahon, I feel do upset for you. Don't leave him anything, he needs to learn respect and manners. No excuse.

My friend has great-great grandchildren, including them, she has over 65 just in her family alone. If she was to gift nieces and nephews, well you do the math. I asked how can you afford to gift? She only gifts to relatives that visit her, or distance ones that phone regularly.
Myself, however, excepting my daughters, I gift until 18 years, then a 21st birthday present. Stops at grandchildren, and maybe great grandchildren, if there is any eventually.

I have one nephew and my intention is to stop birthday and Christmas gifts/money when he finishes university and has the opportunity to earn his own money.

My OH's GC have never thanked him for money sent to them for birthdays and they're all adults in their 20s now with children of their own. A while ago their mother left us a list of all the GGCs birthdays to 'remind' us when they were. We have sent cards and money to three of them so far and not a thank you from any of the GC as before.
What has happened to good manners and a bit of gratitude these days? What time does it take to send a few words in a text?
Mabon I feel so sad for you, what an obnoxious pair, I'd have been so angry I'd certainly make sure they'd get nothing more

Still hoping to see a response to my post as its a problem that I don't know how to solve.

Nanny27 - I know a couple of people who stop giving gifts, once the child reaches 18. This rule when applied to chikdren of friends is quite understandable, but when it comes to your own children and grand children, there should be no age limit. That’s my opinion.
I have 3 AC, 2 ds.i.l. (DD is divorced), 2 grown-up GC and 4 little GC. My total spending for Christmas and Birthdays is a
little over the ‘gift limit’ for tax purposes.
It might seem extravagant but I enjoy giving. I certainly can’t take it with me.
Nanny27 - I hope that answers your question.

Yes, I agree with CrazyH.

crazyH thanks for your reply. I agree with you and couldn't leave any of my grandchildren out whatever their age.

I make cards and gift bags/boxes, I love messing about with paper and card, I make my grt nieces and nephews a card for their birthdays and also make a gift box with a bar of Galaxy or Dairy Milk chocolate in for their birthdays. The eldest grt niece is 21 this year and I will buy something special for her 21st birthday but next year it will be a card only as I send cards to my nieces for their birthdays. I also make a little gift box each for Christmas and Easter with a few choccies in, it's become a sort of tradition and I don't mind doing it.
I don't think I will cut off our own grandchildren at 21 as we only have the two and are only ever likely to have two.

jusnoneed

We went to 18 for niece and nephews and then stopped.
I never started giving to great nephews/nieces, we rarely see anything of them.
We were cut off from grandkids before they reached that age and not seen them since, eldest now in her 30's.

Take heed of no need.
18 seems like a good age.

However, Some people may still make it a big deal of their children reaching 21.

When a cash gift might be just the job.
Sure no it t would be very welcome.